What's the Most Stupid Thing You've Ever Heard At Work??

pookie-poo · Jan 27, 2008

I'm sure this probably won't make too much sense to people...but here goes:

Last Friday, I was scrubbed in on a ruptured abdominal aortic aneurysm. The doctor was sewing in the graft, and I was following the suture (holding it, so it doesn't get caught on clamps and stuff between stitches.) The circulating nurse taps me on my shoulder to get my attention. "Kelli, can you look at this real quick?" I turn my head, and she's pointing at the preference card. "You need to change this on the card, so that it comes up on the computer...blah, blah, blah..." I was flabbergasted!!! Hello! Can you not see that I"m a little busy here??!!!??? There's a time and place for something like that....and right then was neither the time, nor the place!!! Talk about stupid.

butzie · Jan 27, 2008

I was on call for a software vendor that made millon dollar (plus or minus, mostly plus) systems. I get paged at 5 am my time, 8 am eastern time, by a frantic payroll supervisor. "Help," she says, "The payroll program didn't work and we have to pay 10,000 persons today!" My first thought is that there should have been someone on IT night shift who noticed that the program stopped.

However, I asked in what step the program stopped and what was the error message. She said that it stopped in the pre-processor program with so and so a message. I told that we didn't sell a pre-processor program and did the company hire consultants to write one? "Oh, yes, but you support it too, right?" she asked. I said that no we didn't support it. But you sold us the software! Yes, but the consultants wrote the pre-proceessor. But you support it, right. No.

Do you know how much we paid for this software? Yes, I do. Do you know how much we spent on support? Yes I do. Then you have to support it. No the consultants do (and I had a pretty good idea what they cost

).
What am I supposed to do? she asked. I was tempted to tell her to get those consultants to help her cut 10,000 manual checks, but I told her to page the consultants instead. And they were in her same time zone!

catlover19 · Jan 27, 2008

I hear a lot of stupid things at work. I work in a store that has a restaurant in it. Last week, one of the ladies picked up the phone and paged "restaurant call......(paused) 371 please." We all just stood there like...what? The restaurants extension is 371 and she was calling from the restaurant. A minute later she picked up the phone and said "ok let me re-phrase that, cash supervisor call 371"

At least a few times a day, I see customers just standing at random tills putting their stuff on the counter and I have to walk over and say "I'm sorry, but nobody is working at this till right now."

I answer really stupid phone calls too when I am working at the customer service desk. We answer the phone saying "Thank you for calling Zellers, how may I direct your call" and people will say...."Zellers? Why am I calling Zellers?" I really don't know why you are calling Zellers. One day I had a man call and ask me how to spell grocery store. It took me about 5 minutes to tell him how to spell it because he kept saying different letters than I was telling him.

I have sooo many more but I just can't think of any right now.

catkiki · Jan 27, 2008

Originally Posted by Pookie-poo

I'm sure this probably won't make too much sense to people...but here goes:

Last Friday, I was scrubbed in on a ruptured abdominal aortic aneurysm. The doctor was sewing in the graft, and I was following the suture (holding it, so it doesn't get caught on clamps and stuff between stitches.) The circulating nurse taps me on my shoulder to get my attention. "Kelli, can you look at this real quick?" I turn my head, and she's pointing at the preference card. "You need to change this on the card, so that it comes up on the computer...blah, blah, blah..." I was flabbergasted!!! Hello! Can you not see that I"m a little busy here??!!!??? There's a time and place for something like that....and right then was neither the time, nor the place!!! Talk about stupid.

I read this to my husband, who used to work in surgery. He totally understood what you were talking about! That nurse must have had rocks in her head! An aneurysm as with any surgery needed your undivided attention. What did the surgeon say?

pookie-poo · Jan 27, 2008

Originally Posted by Catkiki

I read this to my husband, who used to work in surgery. He totally understood what you were talking about! That nurse must have had rocks in her head! An aneurysm as with any surgery needed your undivided attention. What did the surgeon say?

He was too busy concentrating on sewing in the graft. I took the nurse aside after the surgery, and let her know that she really needs to work on her prioritizing skills!

laureen227 · Jan 27, 2008

Originally Posted by Mom of 4

I work at an elementary school. I could make this thread go 100 pages - all by myself.

i get that - i work in one, too!
i guess the most annoying one i get is this: we have an ARD meeting for a student who has qualified for special ed services. we place him in CM, the least restrictive environment, which is standard procedure, unless the student is severely disabled. i'm talking to the teacher, later, & she's not happy, because she thought he would be in special ed. i explained that he was - CM is special ed. & this student isn't severely disabled [actually, he has mild ADD - really should've just been retained last year, but that's not always done when it should be]. she thought 'special ed' meant Resource.
and altho this happened this year, it's happened to me every year - sometimes more than once!
now, for those of you who don't know - Resource is one of the most restrictive placements. the student is taken off the mainstream curriculum & instructed at his/her current level. we try not to do this unless necessary, as they miss so much in the regular classroom when they leave for a Resource class...

bonnie1965 · Jan 27, 2008

Okay, I remembered some

When people call for a tow, they are usually quite frazzled so I go the extra mile to help. It isn't a fun situation, but it can be funny

Me: Thank you for calling **** how can I help you?
Customer: My car broke down.
Me: Where is the car located?
Customer: On the highway.
Me: On which highway?
Customer: I-5.
Me: Where on I-5? (as far as I know, I5 still runs up through California, Oregon, to the Canadian border in Washington, about 1300 miles)
Me: What state are you in?
Customer: Oregon. (now we're getting somewhere)
Me: Are you northbound or southbound?
Customer: We were headed east.
Me: I-5 only runs north and south.
Customer: Oh. I'm not sure then.
Me: Where are you headed?
Customer: Portland.
Me: Where are you coming from?
Customer: San Francisco.
Me: Okay, you are northbound. Do you remember the last exit you passed?
Customer: No. I wasn't looking at the signs.
Me: What can you see from where you are?
Customer: I see a McDonald's sign. (now we've narrowed it down to about 200 possibilities)
Me: Do you remember anything you saw while driving?

It continues this way for 20 minutes. Then she tells me to nevermind. The tow truck has just shown up! She had forgotten to mention the state police had stopped and called a truck for them. Have mercy. Turns out she was near Portland, by a truck stop which has a big glowing sign. Sheesh.

Wouldn't believe how often people really have no idea where they are. This isn't that unusual.

Back in the days when we still did lockouts, we actually received calls from people who had locked keys in their car. Driver door locked, passenger door unlocked. Or, they locked keys in with older children inside and could not get the kids to open the door.

marie-p · Jan 27, 2008

Ok, I don't remember the exact conversation but it was something like this: (happened a few weeks ago)

Customer: "Can you tell me if I already ordered fabric number 123?"
Me (flipping through my note book): "I don't see an order from it here. When would you have ordered it?"
Customer: "In June" (remember, this call was in December

)
Me: "Hold on a minute, I'll check your file."
A few minutes later...
"No, you never ordered it."
Customer: "Damn! I was so sure I had ordered it! Well, I'm gonna need 4 1/2 yards as soon as possible. When can you get it here?"
Me: "It will take at least 2-3 days."
Then the customer insists that he needs it right away and argues with me that I should send it faster, etc.

Yeah, after knowing for 6 months that you needed that fabric, I'm sure you can't wait 2-3 days now.

I also had customers yell at me because UPS had made a mistake shipping (hey! I don't work for UPS. Call them!!)

But the most irritating so far happened last week. Three of my coworkers were arguing all around me. Worst thing was, I stopped and listened to what they were saying, and they were in agreement. They were just not listening to each other and arguing against what they thought the other person said.
That actually happens a lot. That, and at times I ask them questions, and they begin to answer before I finish - they answer to the question they *think* I'm asking, which is almost always wrong.

laureen227 · Jan 27, 2008

thought of another, from my airline days...
i worked at one of the reservation centers. when you call the airline's 800 number, you can get someone in any area of the country... however, if the airline has a local number, you can also get someone in any area of the country...
we used to get people calling us, wanting us to 'look & see' if their luggage had arrived. had to explain we weren't located at the airport.
we'd also get people who wouldn't tell us where they were! especially if they were in Hawaii. example:
me: thank you for calling Braniff International, this is Lauri.
caller: yeah, i'd like to get a flight to DFW in a couple of weeks.
me: alright, sir, from where to DFW?
caller: well, from here!
me: where are you, sir?
caller: i'm HERE! where are you?
me: sir, i'm in Dallas. where are you?
caller: DALLAS! is this call costing me money? [they almost always asked this... they had usually called a local number.]
me: no, sir. now, from where would you like to leave?
caller: oh, from Honolulu.

catlady2cat · Jan 27, 2008

I used to be a telephone operator and one day a lady called in and wanted someone to come to her house to remove the phone book that had been sent to her houser. She said she was allergic to the phone book!

sweets · Jan 28, 2008

This didn't happen to me, but to a friend of mine. He worked the IT desk for his company. He got a call:

Rick: this is Rick.
Cust: Hi Rick...my computer won't turn on.
Rick: OK, lets check a few things.
He then had them checking wires and buttons. Nothing was happening.
Rick: OK...I'll get someone out to help. Can you give me the serial number?
Cust: No, I can't see it.
Rick: Its on the back of the unit.
Cust: Its too dark in here.
Rick: What do you mean, its too dark.
Cust: We're in the middle of a power outage. There's no electricity to the building, so we have no lights.

saraharizona · Jan 28, 2008

I live in the Washington, D.C. area. One day I was showing a friend around the city, and for fun we took a Tourmobile Ride. As we passed the Washington Monument, I actually heard a lady ask the driver, how do you get all the flags (which encircle the monument) to fly in the same direction?

rockcat · Jan 28, 2008

We have had a customer ask if we could get bleach stains out of her carpet. (Of course we can, with a carpet knife

)

Check out the printing on the bottom of the online order form that we upload to our corporate office: Check here if there is cash with your order.

littleraven7726 · Jan 28, 2008

I think one of the all time dumbest things I've ever heard was when I worked in the programming lab in college (the first time, LOL- I've started working on a second degree this spring). So I was 19 or 20, and there was a guy who I remembered from a class when I was a freshman. He was married and always hitting on girls on campus. Meanwhile he would make disgustingly lovey-dovey calls to his wife from the lab.

One day he decided to hit on me...I was mightily annoyed. He was way older than me and we all knew he was married.

He decided to make small flirty talk with me then hits me with:
"What kind of necklace is that?"
Me: A dragon's tooth.
"Is that a real dragon's tooth?"
Me: Yeah. It's real.

I was wearing a necklace with a ceramic dragon's tooth. Obviously there aren't real dragons dude.

That's still one of the dumbest things I ever heard at work.

theimp98 · Jan 28, 2008

another one that comes to mind, is.
Along time ago well in computer terms. back when they first started putting fax with modem. I got called up to work on someone computer casuse she said it would not fax,,

walk in ask her whats the going on,
i get a 5 min swearing session how she called the computer every name in the book

finally i ask her to show me , so she starts up win fax...........

holds the paper she wants to fax, in front of the monitor.

oh boy

kittkatt · Jan 28, 2008

Originally Posted by Sweets

This didn't happen to me, but to a friend of mine. He worked the IT desk for his company. He got a call:

Rick: this is Rick.
Cust: Hi Rick...my computer won't turn on.
Rick: OK, lets check a few things.
He then had them checking wires and buttons. Nothing was happening.
Rick: OK...I'll get someone out to help. Can you give me the serial number?
Cust: No, I can't see it.
Rick: Its on the back of the unit.
Cust: Its too dark in here.
Rick: What do you mean, its too dark.
Cust: We're in the middle of a power outage. There's no electricity to the building, so we have no lights.

O - M - G!!

Some of these are just way too funny!

~KK~

butzie · Jan 30, 2008

Just talked on the phone to my cousin who works for a large city in the dept. of birth and death certificates (well half the job is joyful). A young man comes in and asks her if she has a birth certificate for John Smith. What year, sir? Oh, about 19 years ago. Smith is a common name, do you have a middle initial or date of birth? How about trying Jose Garcia born on 7/4 he says. She tells him that there are many entries for that name/date. He told her, "Look, lady, I just need a false identity to get a green card." My cousin told him that immigration was 2 doors down on the left and, by the way, that nice looking guy in the uniform at the door will be happy to escort you.

tara g · Jan 30, 2008

There's a lady who works in the lab with me, who actually hasnt spoken to me in a month or so because she got in trouble over a safety issue that involved me (turned off ventilation to a balance enclosure and I got a nice sniff of potassium permanganate - some bad stuff to inhale. I told the boss, she got written up, but I dont feel sorry because it was my freakin' safety!!)

One day, this came out of her mouth while everyone was just babbling about different crap in the lab.

"Black people cannot be racist, only white people."

Are you kidding me?!?!?!?

I think she heard it from another girl who works there, because Rob heard someone else in the lab say it when he worked there too!

What's the Most Stupid Thing You've Ever Heard At Work??

pookie-poo

TCS Member

butzie

TCS Member

catlover19

TCS Member

catkiki

TCS Member

pookie-poo

TCS Member

laureen227

Darksome Duo!

bonnie1965

TCS Member

marie-p

TCS Member

laureen227

Darksome Duo!

catlady2cat

TCS Member

sweets

TCS Member

saraharizona

TCS Member

rockcat

TCS Member

littleraven7726

TCS Member

theimp98

TCS Member

kittkatt

TCS Member

Thread starter

butzie

TCS Member

tara g

TCS Member

Latest Posts

Connect with us