Tell us about the dumbest person you ever went out with!

calico2222

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The "I won't date.." thread got me thinking about some mistakes I've made and the dumb guys I've dated.

The worst has to be this guy I dated for about 4 months. Now, I knew he wasn't the sharpest knife in the drawer but he was cute and fun in the beginning. One night we drove to the top of a mountain and were just looking at the stars (honestly!). I made a comment about how bright they looked from up there. He said, in his very annoying know-it-all voice "well, that's because we're closer to them up here". I explained that it probably has more to do with no city lights around and being in pitch blackness, but he insisted it was because we were closer. And he was completely serious! Ok...the mountain is 800ft above sealevel....the stars are millions of light years away. Yeah, those 800ft make all the difference in the world!


So, what are your stories?
 

esrgirl

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I had just moved to a new city and dated a guy that was really into vampires. He sat up in a tree and jumped down, trying to scare me and a friend. My friend and I laughed so hard and I broke up with him soon after. I was like 14 or 15 and I never admitted to anyone else that I had dated that guy.
 

rubsluts'mommy

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Most of mine were pretty dumb, but none of them really stand out as the worst in the dumb category (although one of my exes was pretty d*** stupid)... now DULL.... heh heh heh... I got one for ya.

Back in Chicago, I was a member of a singles adventure group... at the halloween party one year I met this guy... looked halfway decent (although he was wearing a rented cow suit, so no decent way to gauge his intellect there), we chatted and decided to go for coffee the next week.

I met him for coffee on a Sunday in downtown (which is pretty desolate, except for the shopping area, which we weren't in). We talked about what we each did for a living (he worked for his family business, blue collar). Then I told him about my hobbies (numerous) and asked him about his. These were his exact words:

"I buy and sell things on eBay"

He stopped with that and the silence was deafening. We were the only ones in the coffee shop, except the Barrista. The rest of the conversation was pretty much like that. I kept trying to pull things out of him... nothing. Of course, he was kind of a few bricks shy of a full load.

a few years later, he still stands out as the dullest. Because of him, I make sure any guy i date now (not like it's happening much) has hobbies!!!

Amanda
 

lillekat

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A lot of the guys I've dated have been completely dumb.... not stupid, funny dumb.... jsut plain snot-dumb. I'm not even going to go into details because just the thought of how dumb one of them was makes me furious!
 

sweets

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I once dated a lawyer. Now you would think this guy would be pretty smart...NOPE! We went out for dinner, our first date. And he soon regaled me with the facts that food that grows in the ground is not good for your digestion because the dirt gets inside the food and pushes out the minerals. So he won't eat anything that is green.


I think it was realizing I was having sexual fantasies about the waiter in the middle of dinner that made me understand this guy was no Mr Right.
 

EnzoLeya

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I have two!!!! Well, a lot more than two, but only two really good ones!!!

The first would be a guy I only went out on one date with. I was 18 and he was 21. The date was going well until my questions started to get a little more personal. He wasn't very bright at all....really slow and no common sence. But anyway, I'm asking questions and all the sudden I find out he has a kid! I'm thinking....oh my a kid....I'm a kid! I'm not sure if I can handle this. Then I ask him where is kid lives and where the mom is. Oh! She still lives in the apartment with him! They have been "broke up" for almost a year but she still lives with him!?!?! I never called him back....... (military guy)

Then the next guy I dated that was just plain aweful was this funny childish guy who dated me for a month and then left me to be a ski lift opperater in Colorado!
Of course a few months later he ended up back home in his parents house
I can't belive I dated such a looser!
 
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calico2222

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Originally Posted by Sweets

I once dated a lawyer. Now you would think this guy would be pretty smart...NOPE! We went out for dinner, our first date. And he soon regaled me with the facts that food that grows in the ground is not good for your digestion because the dirt gets inside the food and pushes out the minerals. So he won't eat anything that is green.


I think it was realizing I was having sexual fantasies about the waiter in the middle of dinner that made me understand this guy was no Mr Right.
Ok, I think this beats my "stars are closer" story. He was a lawyer???? Ok, another reason to NOT date a lawyer.
 
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calico2222

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Originally Posted by EnzoLeya

But anyway, I'm asking questions and all the sudden I find out he has a kid! I'm thinking....oh my a kid....I'm a kid! I'm not sure if I can handle this. Then I ask him where is kid lives and where the mom is. Oh! She still lives in the apartment with him! They have been "broke up" for almost a year but she still lives with him!?!?! I never called him back.......
Yeah, definitely run the other way!! That is a Jerry Springer show in the making!
 
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calico2222

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Originally Posted by RubSluts'Mommy

Then I told him about my hobbies (numerous) and asked him about his. These were his exact words:

"I buy and sell things on eBay"

Amanda
Ummm...at least his hobby was profitable? Did you ever find out what he bought and sold on ebay? Hopefully it wasn't knives andstun guns and whatnot. Hey, maybe he was into antiques?
 

arlyn

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I went out once with a guy I met on AOL.
I was living at my parents' house in Seattle and this guy had been newly transplanted from NYC.
He worked at Microsoft.

We made arrangements and he picked me up at home.
He had a nice company car, he was impeccably dressed and had on some rather impressive investment type jewelry (my mom's observation).
He was a gentleman.

He confessed on the way to the restaurant that, being from NYC he'd never really driven much, and didn't own a car.
It was pretty obvious by his driving.

Things went downhill as we were at dinner.
He was loud, very demanding of our waitress, stole a menu, and didn't even leave the poor girl a tip.
We went to a movie, he chose Dumb and Dumber

Again, he was loud and annoying during the whole movie (which he loved).

We went back to his condo for coffee afterwards, he was a total gentleman, but just oh so childish and annoying.

I thankfully, never heard from him again
 

rubsluts'mommy

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Originally Posted by calico2222

Ummm...at least his hobby was profitable? Did you ever find out what he bought and sold on ebay? Hopefully it wasn't knives andstun guns and whatnot. Hey, maybe he was into antiques?
I tried asking him what he sold... he just said 'stuff' ... never specified... knowing the friends I know now out there, I would suspect it was 'stuff' like old p*rno... absolutely no imagination or creativity.

I had more than one date/ex whom still lived at Mom & Dad's house... my first BF did (of course, so did I, but I was still in college).

Another ex was former military (I think I've mentioned this one, as he's the psycho), and what got him booted out of the Navy was a Bonehead move of teaming up with a buddy and scheming some some sort of illegal plan to dupe the navy out of something... well, of course, he was so stupid his 'bosses' found out and he was caught. He turned on his buddy, thus getting an Admin Discharge, instead of a Dishonorable and jail time. Granted, the deal he finagled for no jail time was smart, but he should have known better for getting into the whole thing in the first place.

A.
 

rubsluts'mommy

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Originally Posted by Arlyn

Things went downhill as we were at dinner.
He was loud, very demanding of our waitress, stole a menu, and didn't even leave the poor girl a tip.
We went to a movie, he chose Dumb and Dumber

Again, he was loud and annoying during the whole movie (which he loved).

We went back to his condo for coffee afterwards, he was a total gentleman, but just oh so childish and annoying.

I thankfully, never heard from him again
*snort* Sorry... he reminds me of a guy I sort of dated. I went to a Twelfth Night with some Renaissance Faire friends when I was 19. I was with a Scottish Clan, he was with the French. (Yet, not French). We were both in rented outfits... that matched. He acted the perfect gentleman during Twelfth Night... (except the whole unlacing my bodice while we kissed... the kissing being part of the fun of a Twelfth Night) ... So we invited him along to our 'after party' of going to Rocky Horror Pic. Show... I changed into a different outfit (okay, shorter skirt, etc). He'd never been to Rocky, as had I. While I understood the 'etiquette' of a live Rocky show, he did not. He was loud, yelling back at the folks behind us who were JUST doing audience participation. All while I was sitting on his lap... I didn't WANT to sit on his lap... my friends forced me to do it for the first part, becuase they were still in their hoop skirts and needed to sit in the front row (I was considered a Rocky Virgin and was required to sit in the front) until Time Warp.

Needless to say I had my friends distract him while i booked it to the car and went home.

never heard from him again, Thank God!!!

Amanda
 

addiebee

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OK, this doesn't qualify as dumbest, but it does qualify as the most rude guy I ever went on a date with.

I decided to do some singles ads, etc. I don't remember if he answered mine or vice versa. He was a local PR exec. We agreed to meet for lunch. Well, he walked in, took one look at me and I could tell he didn't like what he saw. I certainly didn't mis-represent myself!

He kept calling by the wrong name, checking his watch, gobbled his food and proceeded to inform me that he had to go up to the state capitol for a meeting and needed to leave. Allrighty then...

I dubbed him, "Mr. 20 minute lunch".
 

theimp98

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person i had been chatting with online, called asked me to meet her for coffee.
told her,hey i had been out all day on the motorcycle,and i need a shower and everthing before meeting someone for a first time.

she said dont care,its just coffee. said, ok, rode down to meet her.Of course she shows up all dressed up,how i was sittting there, some young people that i know road past,they saw my bike, and come in looking for me. They asked if we wanted to go horse back riding, she said yea sure. so we wanted 2 hours for her to go home and change colthes. lol it seemd like everything went well,

i get a email from her saying that she had fun, but i was to immature to date.
and she could not afford to be seen with me again. that i was bad dresser. etc etc etc it was like a 2 page paper.

a month later, she calls me asks me to go out, lol i just laugh hang up on her.
couple of days later, she,call,next day she calls, soon she was calling me every day.

finally i get a court order to stop harassing her

follwed 2 days later with her calling asking me out again,
in this case 1 date= almost a year worth of pain in the butt.
oh yea, her job , a lawyer
 

beck4582

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Oh lord.... before I met my husband I went out with some real winners.... I swear I had a sign on my head that said "Idiot's, please talk to me!"

I went out with this one guy - we met online and I wanted to meet for the first time in public, cause you never know these days. We went to this pub where I was a regular and had a couple of drinks. He got a phone call - didn't answer it - and was suddenly like "I have to go, will you walk me to my car?" My internal alarms went off and I was like "No, it's dark and I'm not walking back alone downtown..." He got really mad and said "I'll call you later". Well, the next day I see his number calling my phone. I pick it up, and to my surprise, it's his WIFE... She told me that they were getting a divorce and I was so shocked and felt so bad for her I told her that if she ever needed any kind of witness to help her get whatever she was asking for in the divorce to call me back and I would help her....
 

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I was set up on a blind date with a friend's friend's grandson. I wasn't crazy about it, but she insisted--she really wanted him to meet me. (I shouldn've know better when she said, "I want him to turn over a new leaf, and meet a nice girl for once." I kinda wondered who/what he was dating before!)

Ok, Sunday afternoon, lunch at a restaurant. I had to hold the door open for him (he had a bit of trouble walking--he had been in a car accident, and had surgery, and was going in for more surgery very soon). We got lunch. Tried to engage him in chat. He sat there, with his arms crossed. I asked about his hobbies--reading? (Remember, I work in a library.) "Reading? I guess could get interested in that some day." Wow--don't put out your back doing that, old boy--you don't want to strain yourself. The rest of the time, he talked about his upcoming surgery a lot, and bragged about his "former" heavy drinking in the Army (and I don't drink). Then I heard all about his near-fatal car accident--he claimed he "slid on wet leaves" (I personally think he was drunk, and driving too fast). The accident is what hurt his leg. I tried to be sympathetic. His near-death car was a Ford Probe. Well, after 20 minutes (I'm serious), he said, nodding at my plate, "You know you can have that wrapped up to go?", looked at his watch, and said he had to do some roofing on his house with friends that afternoon.

We walked out to his car--A DIFFERENT, but same model, FORD PROBE. Now, Probes, even then, were not the most common cars; he had to have gone to a bit of trouble to get the very same model as the "death car". AND, he had REMOVED the seat belt and harness from the driver's side! (Not only illegal, but pretty darned stupid.) I honestly, from the way he talked, and that car, thought he was hoping the next accident would kill him.

We said good-bye; and HE told ME, "Drive safely, now."


Despite all of the above, I did send him a get-well card for his surgery, but needless to say, never heard from him after our "date".
 

persi & alley

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As I reported on KatKwiz today, the percentage of women on this site keeps going up, up, up. MEN! What's the dumbest woman you ever dated? I'll start. The woman who posted a picture of herself on the internet from 20 years earlier and 50 pounds earlier. As if I wasn't going to notice when we finally met!

Oh well, forget it, no men are reading this anyway.
 

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lol nice thread!!

((I think this has more to do with a brake up.. but same thing, as he tried getting back with me))

I dated this Guy about a Yr ago, my Best Friend introduced us while I had a BF. So After I broke up with my BF I went out with him for about 3 days... Worst BF ever!!!
So he was so Clingy.. I thought I was Clingy! no this guy wouldnt let me breath and was saying I Love you on the first date!! So then he was just getting annoying so I broke up with him and he got all POed and started threatening me

I broke up with him the day before I was due to go on a vacation to Northern FL ((I lived in western FL at the time)) and he contacted me the night I went on my VayCay and said sorry and everything ((he messaged me on myspace btw)) so I told him to call me so we could talk about it... Well I kinda sorta gave him the Rejection Hotline Number!!!

Didnt hear from him for months, then one day he message me out of nowhere asking me to date him!! ((by then i had moved to MA... which he knew i was supposed to)) and I told him no... he got mad and said something like "well you know what I hope you kill yourself cuz I was the only one keeping you from killing yourself before"
!!! No! I never tried and never thought of it so I have no clue where he got that from!!
Gosh I hate Teenage Drama!! im kinda Glad I moved when I did cuz he probably would have stalked me or something!!
 

lunasmom

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Originally Posted by theimp98

person i had been chatting with online, called asked me to meet her for coffee.
told her,hey i had been out all day on the motorcycle,and i need a shower and everthing before meeting someone for a first time.

she said dont care,its just coffee. said, ok, rode down to meet her.Of course she shows up all dressed up,how i was sittting there, some young people that i know road past,they saw my bike, and come in looking for me. They asked if we wanted to go horse back riding, she said yea sure. so we wanted 2 hours for her to go home and change colthes. lol it seemd like everything went well,

i get a email from her saying that she had fun, but i was to immature to date.
and she could not afford to be seen with me again. that i was bad dresser. etc etc etc it was like a 2 page paper.

a month later, she calls me asks me to go out, lol i just laugh hang up on her.
couple of days later, she,call,next day she calls, soon she was calling me every day.

finally i get a court order to stop harassing her

follwed 2 days later with her calling asking me out again,
in this case 1 date= almost a year worth of pain in the butt.
oh yea, her job , a lawyer
I would have sent her a court order to keep her crazy side away from you.

Hmmm...I guess the dumbest guy lasted two dates...he actually didn't show his dumb side until the 2nd date. He was a mailman and was telling me that he witnessed magic that day.
He said that he was out delivering mail, walking through a narrow way between 2 townhouses and a piece of mail fell onto the ground. He said that the wind picked up and the letter magically floated onto the roof of one of the townhouses. He said it was the most amazing thing he ever saw.

Umm...honey its called a vacuum...physics. Not magic.

He was also part of some local org that I was involved in and I realised I was lucky to break things off with him. He held a social at his house and out there on his bookshelves was "Dating for Dummies"
 

tigerlord

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Originally Posted by Persi & Alley

As I reported on KatKwiz today, the percentage of women on this site keeps going up, up, up. MEN! What's the dumbest woman you ever dated? I'll start. The woman who posted a picture of herself on the internet from 20 years earlier and 50 pounds earlier. As if I wasn't going to notice when we finally met!

Oh well, forget it, no men are reading this anyway.
You are wrong, I'm totally enjoying this thread


Since I'm relatively young I've never really turned to Internet dating, although one of my good girlfriend used it and had success. In any case, my worst date was a blind date one of my friend set me up with.

I had little expectations, except he kept telling me she was hot. I'm unlike the usual guy I'd say - by that I mean that buttocks and breasts only give someone so much charm in my book, and don't count as much as the eyes, and especially, the smile. I gotta say there is one thing I really can't stand, it's yellow/brown teeth.

Well, when I went to pick her up, she hot alright, until she smiled at me.


She had the biggest horsemouth I had ever seen, and some majorly yellow teeth. Since her daddy was this big executive type, I knew it wasn't a money issue as it can sometimes be, but a major hygiene issue.

At dinner, she had ribs, and I swear to god, her lips disappeared under the sauce that SHE WOULD NOT WASH AWAY FOR THE ENTIRE DINNER!
Ladies, do you like it when we eat like pigs? I kept asking myself how a hot girl like this could be so deprived of self hygiene.

I did my very best the whole night and apparently it never transpired since she never commented about it to my friend. When she asked if I wanted to come in, I was simply too afraid at what I could find down there, so wished her a good night and thanked her for a pleasant evening...
 
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