help-- is my cat depressed?

i am really new to this site.. and i apologize if this entry is a little long

my fiance and i have 2 cats.. maddy & dexter.... we got maddy last february from a shelter, and had a rough time with her at first.. she was very sick with several viral infections, and visited the emergency vet 3 times the first week.. after lots of medicine (and bills!) she became healthy and happy.. she has had all her shots and has been spayed.

my fiance brought dexter home on thanksgiving... he was only about 4 weeks old (a stray who's mother was hit by a car). we took him to the vet and fed him formula, now he is potty trained and eating regular kitty food.

when we first brought dexter home, maddy was very upset.. hissing, growling, swatting, and just being mean. it took some time, a lot of coaxing and love, and now she seems fine with him. they have seperate kitty beds, seperate food dishes, and lots of toys to play with. he is very curious and will constantly go after her tail (she's a mainecoon so very fluffy) and she will run after him and "babysit"...watching while keeping a distance.

lately though, she has been very lazy.. sleeping a lot, and just keeping to herself. she will still be lovey with me, letting me hold her and pet her, and she is still eating/drinking normally and no problems with using the bathroom. (thankfully no spraying!)

i am a little worried that she is depressed with the new kitten, although we have had him for over a month now. i know it takes time, i just dont know if this is something to worry over, visit the vet, or just let it be.

any advice is greatly appreciated.... my fiance thinks im just overreacting since she seems perfectly healthy... and he thinks that possibly she is just exhausted from running after the little one all day (&night!)....maybe he is right? she still will purr when i pet her, eat her "treats" and lay with me occasionally....but just seems to be sleeping a lot more... am i overreacting? help!

I wouldn't get overly worried about the situation. Cats are creatures of habit and when their "territory" is changed, they take time to adjust as well. As long as she's still eating, playing, going in the litter box, etc, I really don't think you have much to worry about. Just give it time, before long she'll probably be playing with the little one and sleeping with him.

thank you... i think im just an overly worried "mom" and know that she will be fine (just like my fiance says) but it's nice to hear it from other cat owners too...

I recently( 11/10) got a new kitty. My 6.5 year old female seems a little more quiet too but I think it's because kitties have so much energy. The contrast is more apparent than when you have 2 grown kitties at the same time. Dontcha think?

it is true...dexter is a little crazy ball of energy.. and maddy's just a fluffy puff... even though she isn't very old, it seems so long since she was a tiny little thing...thanks for the insight... im just a worrier at heart

Originally Posted by chryssie21

it is true...dexter is a little crazy ball of energy.. and maddy's just a fluffy puff... even though she isn't very old, it seems so long since she was a tiny little thing...thanks for the insight... im just a worrier at heart

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Its funny because I'm not a worrier in general, but when it comes to my cats, I'm crazy. Why isn't Ernie playing? Is he sick? Does Santo feel well? Etc etc. My friends tell me that I'm insane when it comes to worrying about my cats, but I can't help it. They are so darn cute and so loyal, I just can't help myself. So I empathize with you in that you worry too much about your cats, I do the same thing. I'll have to say that in all the worrying I've done in the 8 months I've had them, everything I've worried about has turned out to be a "nothing."

Another thing to keep in mind - cats will very often (if not always) take a back seat to new ones - they first try to fend them off, as yours did, but then accept them and back off, almost as if they're following an instinct that says the new one's now in charge, so respect it! My new little (male) sweetie has completely bamboozled my big, strong, beautiful guy into thinking he's in charge (the new one, that is), yet when the older one was a baby, another male we had accepted him instantly, they became best friends, and neither tried to dominate... so go figure!

One other thing...has she recently had vaccinations? I've got a couple that sleep a lot after vaccines.

I have one that got really depressed after losing his buddy! He was lost without him and would scream histerically! I would think this would be nothing to worry about just as long as she is eating normal amounts of food, going to the bathroom properly and still is loving! Sometimes you can accidently give the new kitten way more attention that you do the other one and then the other one feels left out! I would think that the new kitten is just keeping her busy though!! She'll be a busy mommy in no time!! Good luck to ya! Keep us posted!

P.S. when all else failed I took my 7 y/o to the vet and got him an anti anxiety, which go figure, worked right away!

I wouldn't necessarily conclude that Maddy is depressed or lazy, though it is possible. Bear in mind that, in general, females are more territorial than males, and tend to take longer to accept a newcomer, which might be why she was upset in the beginning. Also, I know that you said that she's "not very old," but maybe she's transitioning out of the crazy kitten stage into a more sedate adulthood?

thank you to all that responded... i did end up taking both kitties to the vets recently... and maddy had some sort of allergic reaction which ended up with small scabs all over her and a possible attitude change.. she is on medicine now, and doing MUCH better... they are wonderful playmates, and have started to somewhat sleep near each other (about a foot apart versus different rooms)

life is getting back to normal (somewhat, lol) but i wanted to say thanks again for all your help!

Kitty might be a little ticked off..but otherwise she sounds fine. I have a foster mom cat that i take care of..she had post-partum depression after her babies were weaned. She stopped eating and got very thin. she refused to play and just layed around..sometimes in the same spot for a whole day..i did not understand what was wrong and I thought she was sick..here the vet said she was depressed. Alot of extra loving and she is comming around slowly. She is eating and just started some playing.
It is going to take time for your kitty to adjust to the new family member. Sometimes its takes months. It depends on your cats personality. But i think your cat is fine. I am glad to read that your kitties are doing much better...Good Luck

I'm glad they're getting better and things are settling down for you a bit
and that Maddy's feeling better.....were you able to find out what she had an allergic reaction to?