Well I've been debating this post all evening, and now here I am. I'm not going into all the details, but it's about my 'new job.'
This may be a little long, but I'll be as brief as I can.
I started today. I went in at 11 and by 3 something I was fighting tears. I bawled all the way home and for quite a while afterward. DH didn't call that he was on his way home like usual, so he caught me crying. I hoped to be better by the time he got home. But even when he did I couldn't fight them enough.
In short, the job is not what I wanted. It's an office position, but includes some manual labor. Manual labor does not agree with my back. Heck I'm in pain after sitting. I also felt very out of place. The people were nice enough, but I did not fit in. And it wasn't the kind of out of place where it goes away with time.
I just don't know what to do. I'm scheduled tomorrow and Saturday. Part of me says give it another day (the logical part) while the emotional part says what more proof do I need that this isn't the right place?
I'm so tired of job searching. I'm frustrated and very disappointed. DH said it was up to me to either give it a few days or to call them in the morning and just say thank you, but I don't feel I fit this position well; which is the truth. I wish it was just an uncomfortable fit; where I could keep working till I get something better. But I just don't see it. I've never in my life had an experience like today. I've had days that sent me into the bathroom for a little cry and then I got through it. This was not like that. Mom always told our clients that not every person fits every job. I never realized how true that is until today. I don't want to let DH down or put any more on him. He says we will be fine and he knows I appreciate him.
Please say a few prayers for me for guidance and peace. I sorely need them. I think now what I need is to go rest my aching head and laugh; so I will go put in a Golden Girls DVD and see if an answer comes.
I started today. I went in at 11 and by 3 something I was fighting tears. I bawled all the way home and for quite a while afterward. DH didn't call that he was on his way home like usual, so he caught me crying. I hoped to be better by the time he got home. But even when he did I couldn't fight them enough.
In short, the job is not what I wanted. It's an office position, but includes some manual labor. Manual labor does not agree with my back. Heck I'm in pain after sitting. I also felt very out of place. The people were nice enough, but I did not fit in. And it wasn't the kind of out of place where it goes away with time.
I just don't know what to do. I'm scheduled tomorrow and Saturday. Part of me says give it another day (the logical part) while the emotional part says what more proof do I need that this isn't the right place?
I'm so tired of job searching. I'm frustrated and very disappointed. DH said it was up to me to either give it a few days or to call them in the morning and just say thank you, but I don't feel I fit this position well; which is the truth. I wish it was just an uncomfortable fit; where I could keep working till I get something better. But I just don't see it. I've never in my life had an experience like today. I've had days that sent me into the bathroom for a little cry and then I got through it. This was not like that. Mom always told our clients that not every person fits every job. I never realized how true that is until today. I don't want to let DH down or put any more on him. He says we will be fine and he knows I appreciate him.
Please say a few prayers for me for guidance and peace. I sorely need them. I think now what I need is to go rest my aching head and laugh; so I will go put in a Golden Girls DVD and see if an answer comes.