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Update

post #1 of 19
Thread Starter 
Well its been a hard month or so since Thanksgiving. The wekkedned of I tried to kill myslef and was put in the hospital for 48 hours.

After getting out of there I did so so for a few weeks then tried again and went back to the hospital for about a little less then a week.

Sunday I cut my wrist and went back in until x-mas morning.

So as you can see im still strugling but feeling a little better yesterday and today, I will be starting partial Hopspitalizastion (sp) on Monday 2 days a week.

I am just going day by day. Telling myself I can make it through today.

I thank you all for all the support that you have giving me it means so much to me to know im ok and not alone.
post #2 of 19
Quote:
Originally Posted by april31 View Post
Well its been a hard month or so since Thanksgiving. The wekkedned of I tried to kill myslef and was put in the hospital for 48 hours.

After getting out of there I did so so for a few weeks then tried again and went back to the hospital for about a little less then a week.

Sunday I cut my wrist and went back in until x-mas morning.

So as you can see im still strugling but feeling a little better yesterday and today, I will be starting partial Hopspitalizastion (sp) on Monday 2 days a week.

I am just going day by day. Telling myself I can make it through today.

I thank you all for all the support that you have giving me it means so much to me to know im ok and not alone.

Oh, I'm so sorry to hear all this. I don't even know what to say, except you can always talk to us...
post #3 of 19
There is always someone here you can talk to. Please do not give up. We are here for you.
post #4 of 19
I am sorry sweetie!! Please know you can always count on us!!
post #5 of 19
As someone who has been very close to attempting suicide, I know how bad I felt. I can never know what your going through or how bad you feel, but I do know that you would be missed. I know it is hard for you to see right now, but trust me there is at least one person in your life that would be devistated to lose you. I hope that you have some good counseling, and that you are on some type of medication. The thing that was most important for me was to learn the early signs. To get help before you feel as bad as you do right now. I think one day at a time is a good idea.
I will be thinking of you and sending vibes & prayers that you are feeling better!
post #6 of 19
You are never alone here at TCS, whatever you need, we will help you!
Hang in there! We are all here for you! If you need anything at all - never hesitate to ask!

Here are some pictures to hopefully make you smile

post #7 of 19
Thread Starter 
Aw you all are great and yes the pictures made me smile. I just hope the meds get working soon although im feeling pretty good today. Hugs to all of you!!!
post #8 of 19
I don't know the story but to me nothing is worth killing yourself over. I hope you get the help you need and feel better soon.
post #9 of 19
I hope things will start looking better for you. And that you get the proper help. Will keep you in our prayers
post #10 of 19
Please PM me if you ever need to talk!! Your life is work living!!!
post #11 of 19
Oh, April. I'm so sorry. What does your counselor say about all this? What does she want you to do?

I know your children are your top priority, but it's like they say on airplanes -- you have to put the oxygen mask over your own face first, then worry about getting masks on those around you. If you don't save yourself, you can't save anyone else.

Can your husband or another family member care for your children a little while? It would be so good if you could go into an inpatient center for a few weeks, free of all distractions, free of all demands, and just concentrate on finding your balance again. Would you like to do that?

It breaks my heart to know you're so hurt and hopeless that you can even think of suicide. Please, if your counselor wants you to go to inpatient care, go! Just go... it's the most important thing you can possibly do right now, the best thing for you and for your children.

You need more than just medication and weekly counseling. For awhile, at least, you need a whole support system, 24 hours a day, from people you can count on to understand... people whose only interest is your well-being. Please give yourself that gift if you possibly can.

And darlin, if the thought of hurting yourself crosses your mind again, please, please stop and call 911. Tell the operator how feel and ask if someone can come and talk to you. Police and paramedics are trained in these things, and they'll understand, and they'll help you regain control.

Nobody deserves to feel this way. You have a God-given right to stand up and live your life with joy! And there are lots of caring, professional people ready and able to help you do that. Please let them do their jobs... and please let us be here for you too. Come see us here every day and let us know how things are going... okay? There are so many of us here, and we've all been through a lot of stuff... nothing you can say will shock us, I promise. We're with you.
post #12 of 19
Nothing in this world is worth your life! Not boys not stress not school not the way others see you. . . NOTHING! Suicide is the most selfish thing anyone could do. Whether you know it or not there are MANY people that care about you, and would be devastated if you did something like that. . .

I too was once where you are. I know what it is like to hurt so bad on the inside that the pain you feel when cutting your wrists or hurting yourself any other way feels better, or good, but its not the answer. . . You are better than that to let it get the best of you. Keep your chin up. Life getts better, if you let it.

Please keep us updated on how you are feeling. There are so many people on here who care about you!
post #13 of 19
I have been wondering how you are doing. So glad you are here Girl, you come here and post any time .... lots of people here care about you even if we don't always say it the right way

Nothing at all shocks me so don't be afraid to lay it out there if you have to. Off to find a pic for you .... be right back!
post #14 of 19
Sometimes, you just gotta say what you feel!
post #15 of 19
Thread Starter 
lol how cute is that. Yup still around i go see my councelor tomorrow and also checking out this partial hop thingy. So ill let you know how it goes.
post #16 of 19
Wonderful! We're all here pulling for you Please keep us updated

here's another for a smile
post #17 of 19
That's great news -- I'm thinking of you and sending you all kinds of light...
post #18 of 19
April 31, you will be in my thoughts and prayers that you soon receive the healing that you need. You are very courageous to go through with your counseling and therapy I know this is the internet, and many people "visit" TCS, and who knows how many dispairing people will read your posts and be encouraged to take action to get help themselves - TCS is here for you
post #19 of 19
Sending that way. You can also PM me anytime you need to talk.
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