I am glad it is over.

gailuvscats

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I love getting prepared for Xmas and picking out gifts for everyone, but then I end up eating too much from Halloween till Xmas, and stressed out because our family is emotionally estranged due to my Brother and SIL no longer living together, and being kinda divorced for over a decade, but still interacting a lot because of my niece who we all love since she is the only one (she is 32 now)

Anyway long story short, my SIL dislikes my mother, my brother dotes on my mother (82) My mother was always a mean spirited immature person ( she is trying to be better in her old age, but some people can't change) and my niece now has a boyfriend who is a fat snob, but she loves him, I think he's a jerk, but of course never would say or show that.

Cut to the chase SIL had Xmas eve, and it seemed like we had two factions, her and the kids, and my brother and mom and me.

More to the chase, my feelings were really hurt by her generous gift to me which consisted of gift cards to a mini mart gas station, and a restaurant, both of which are not within a reasonable distance for me to use. I live two hours a way from her, and they are for her local places.
Which of course shows that she took no thought in a gift for me, or my mother who got the same. This really hurts me because I always thought we had a sisterly bond, but I see I was mistaken. I took hours shopping and choosing stuff I thought she would love. I know I should not be ungrateful, and I am not, it's just that I see it as a clear message to me, that she feels about me the same way she feels about my mother, which is not in very high regard.

She put a lot of effort into shopping for my niece and my brother, but for me and mom, it seems as if she just had a bunch of gift cards and put them in an envelope. She gave mom one to a grocery store.

So anyway, I will get over it, but next year I am really tempted to get her a gift card for a store around here that does not exist in her town, but I know I won't, I am not that inconsiderate, and it would just start some crap. Still my feelings are really hurt. I feel so unloved.
 

lillekat

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Aw hun you're not unloved,
but it wasn't particularly nice to have your feelings hurt like that. Like you said, you'll get over it, but that doesn't stop it hurting now when you have put so much effort into her Christmas gift. If you put that kind of work in for someone else, you'd like to hope that they would do the same for you,especially if you are close
I don't think you're being ungrateful, but I do think she was being inconsiderate. Nevermind sweetie, you know just where to put your efforts next year.
 

crittermom

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I firmly think that people like that, are not worth the effort.I would continue to do for her as you have always done.TRY and not let it get to you.
 

katz4life

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Aww don't feel that way! Thats a bummer how your SIL didn't take the time for picking out presents like you did but at least you know you put lots of thought into her gift. Even when she got you a gift card, she could of at least got you a card to one of your favorite stores around your area...

Now you know how she really feels about your relationship. Don't let your SIL make you feel unloved.

Do whatever makes you happy!
 
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