Welcome to full membership!
So, you're not supposed to look in here during school? It's not "educational"? Get that administrator or professor or teacher, or whomever he or she is, over here now!Hey, you!
Per-fesser! Big Boss Man, Woman, or Undecided! That's right, you with the know-it-all look on your face! Now see here, smarty pants, this web site is as "educational" as any you'll find anywhere on the inter-net! You can tell, because of the calm and reasoned tone in every post! All you'll find here are facts, facts and more facts!
Fact number one: If you give Michelle any guff about being logged on to this web site, I'll personally come over there and throw a pie in your face. And have you ever heard of a "blivet"?
Fact number two: Tell the school board or the board of higher education or whatever body of dorks dreamed up these stupid policies that at this very moment a posse comitatus
of feral cats is poised to pour sugar in the fuel tanks of those flee-to-the-suburbs over-priced steel cocoons parked in the six-car garages of those board members' McMansions. They await my signal.
Fact number three: If this "don't look at The Cat Site because it's not 'educational' enough" policy isn't removed by noon tomorrow, I'll stand in front of the school's nearest five-dollar-cup-of-coffee dispensary (the one with all the overstuffed chairs and the Wall Street Journal
) in the nude
! Not a pretty picture, is it?
Fact number four: But wait! There's more! This is only the beginning! Now I'm a reasonable person, as you can tell. We can avoid all these unpleasantries if you'll simply have the administration donate, say, US$5,000 per month to The Cat Site.
Remember: noon tomorrow, or else!