Are the other cats holding him back from liking people?

We have a semi-feral kitten who, after making good progress at first, seem to have hit a wall with his socialization. his brothers have all been tamed and adopted out, but he still doesn't seem to like humans, and i'm beginning to think our other cats are holding him back.

he will accept petting if he's lying around, and will play with cat dancer type toys with us, he'll even take cat treats from our fingers. but he doesn't seem interested in humans (beyond food giving), remaining skittish much of the time, hiding when we get too close. we've had him for 2 months.

now, could the fact that we have 4 resident cats and 2 other kittens in the house be keeping him from bonding with us? The cats all get along and play and sleep together, they groom him and basically mother him constantly. It's been great for his confidence and security, but his taming progress doesn't seem to be going further.

Does it follow that if we separated him from the other cats he would sort of be forced to come around? it sounds a little harsh but i feel if he didn't have all these cats to fall back on, he would learn to see us as affection-givers and playmates like he does his fellow felines. am i getting too Ayn Rand here?



he's in the middle in the photo.

It took close to 6 months before my feral rescue started to come out of his shell and feel more comfortable around us humans.

Now he's a huge baby who wants me to pick him up all the time.

Just give him time and patience. And talk to him as often as possible. Talk to yourself when you know he can hear you. He'll come around when he's ready to.

lmao I've had my semi feral for a year and a half now of which a year she was by herself and she still isn't 100% comfortable. Occasionally when you approach her she will run off. Sometimes she will let you hold her but will complain the entire time. Basically it may just be your cat's naturally personality, or it may be that she just needs more time. Keep trying I'm sure the kitten will get better

Originally Posted by jimmylegs

am i getting too Ayn Rand here?

Click to expand...

That's funny!

I actually use my socialized cats to help tame the feral cats that come into my home. They typically first bond with the other cats, then over time, they realize that their "buddies" are getting something special from the big scary human and they want some of that loving too.

Give him time and he will come around as well as any cat comes around. Some of them take no time at all, and others take months if not years. But my theory is that every cat, regardless of their feral origins, has their own personality and some cats will always be more friendly or more skittish than other cats. I've known a lot of so called "normal" cats that are skittish by nature.

Do NOT separate him from the others to force yourself on him. You will take huge steps backwards if you try to do this. Cats always work on their schedule, not yours. Be happy for any little bit of success you have with him but don't force yourself on him.

The socialization method suggested is good. It's very similar to how Caesar Milan approaches socializing problem dogs. Also, here is another option to consider too. There is a flower essence called Feral Cat Comforter. This page describes any questions you may have regarding the Anaflora flower essences:

http://www.anaflora.com/essences/index.html

This is the specific page you can print out to order:

http://www.anaflora.com/contact-order/order.html

Originally Posted by organikat

The socialization method suggested is good. It's very similar to how Caesar Milan approaches socializing problem dogs.

Click to expand...

I'm not sure if you were referring to my post here, but I do have to say if you were, my techniques have nothing to do with Cesar Milan. I am firmly against his methods. If you want to hear more, PM me please.

Actually, the cats who like you are modeling the behavior you want from your feral boy.

Seeing the other cats get affection will help him come around.

So I'd say don't go all Ayn Rand on him. (This has not worked in other areas...)

We can't force the cat. This is not an area where you should be proactive, except making your presence and attention as appealing as possible.