Originally Posted by sadieandziggy
I DO NOT agree with spanking a child. It teaches children to solve things with violence, starting with the odd slap and ending with a punch and a kick, and much worse. If spanking is a part of everyday life because the child will not behave, that child will eventually hit back.
I was spanked as a child. I didn't LIKE it. But it did NOT teach me that violence is the way to solve things, not by any means. In fact, I am one of the more non-violent people I know. TALKING solves things.
However, sometimes a child will push and push and push and if there are no real limits, no SERIOUS consequences, then physical discipline used a a last resort DOES WORK.
My daughter is 23 now. I spanked her when she needed it. I NEVER crossed the line - if I was that
angry, I would hit her mattress instead, so she could see
how angry I was about whatever it was that she had done wrong. And that was only when she had done something SERIOUSLY wrong, like playing on a main street when she knew darned well that was forbidden.
My daughter was once in a "fight" as a teenager. She came home with a black eye. I asked if she had fought back, and she said no, because that wasn't the right way to solve things. I was really proud of her.
So really, in general, you cannot say that spanking teaches violence. What it does teach is LIMITS.
If parents are abusive, then yes, the children may grow up to think violence is the answer. But if parents are caring and communicative, and provide proper discipline, then children grow up knowing that there are actions to conseqences and boundaries are clearly defined. Right and wrong is CLEARLY defined.
THe parents that I see now that do not discipline their children have children that walk ALL OVER them. They are raising BRATS that have zero respect for their elders or anyone else.
Go ahead. Spare the rod. But keep in mind that what you'll be raising is a spoiled human product. And keep your (the general "your," not aimed at anyone directly) ill-behaved children the heck away from me.