Loosing patience with my kitten

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freezebyte

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Well, this has been a entertaining/learning/fustrating past week with my first kitten/cat ever. I introduced myself earlier here http://www.thecatsite.com/forums/sho...d.php?t=148092and it looks like this is a very nice community. Maybe you guys can send some encouregment, knowledge or what not.

Like I said, I never had a cat before in my life, my girlfriend was raised with them however so its a big adjustment for me. I've thought about getting a cat for a number of years and more recently with the girlfriend. I decided to take the plunge last week and got Shadow at Petsmart.

Being somewhat of a lone wolf my whole life, up until meeting my current girlfriend *In case you wondering, we BOTH have decided no children in our lives* im used to having everything under control and and in order on my terms. Well, with this kitten now, i'm finding it very fustrating to the point where I wish I never got the cat.

At times he can be so wonderful and cute, but other times his "cat" behavior just aggravates me. The fact of having cat poo and hair in my home is still something i'm trying to get used to. He's already had several "accidents" with the litter box and I had to clean it and him up and nearly vomited from the smell. Not a plus in my book.

His random "kitten bursts" of energy really annoy when im trying to work on the computer or play video games or just want some time out. He starts chewing on my wiring at random times which results in a severe water blast from my water bottle which he tends to ignore half the time. His constant mewing whenever im in the kitchen or even in a different room was cute at first, but now its just....aggravating. Im really dreading when he starts to claw/shred stuff even though I have a scratch pad on standbye.

And just earlier while I was trying to enjoy a bath he kept mewing and trying to climb into the tub which somehow he did and fell right into it. Now i've got wet kitten litter in my clean tub/bathroom and a wet cat running around the house, up late past my bedtime trying to dry him and keep him from making a wet mess in my bed which he HAS to sleep in with me. I can't help but feel i've made a poor decision even though I researched and thought about this for some time. The reality is that im 50/50 of either very amused or very annoyed with him.

My girlfriend is understanding and says to just be patient for him to grow out of his "kitten" phase and he'll be calmer and less demanding. I hate to just give up after all this thought/time and money but at the same time I wonder if I should just call it quits while I have the chance and give him to a better home while he's young.

As I write this he's pathetically sitting in my lap with his very sad eyes and mewing softly, looking so innocent and helpless. I haven't felt so torn in my life......
 

catnip

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What you're describing is normal kitten behaviour. If you find his energy or crying too distracting then maybe spend more time playing with him therefore tiring him out. He sounds like he might be a bit lonely if he follows you into the bathroom.

I love it when they're at this age. When cats get older they tend to start sleeping way more and they're not as much fun so you should enjoy it while you can.

BTW no-one finds cat poo pleasant. I have had to clean up some horrific things but again you need to decide whether you're willing to do that in exchange for the joys cats bring into your life.
 
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freezebyte

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Originally Posted by Catnip

What you're describing is normal kitten behaviour. If you find his energy or crying too distracting then maybe spend more time playing with him therefore tiring him out. He sounds like he might be a bit lonely if he follows you into the bathroom.
Yeah, he's pretty demanding. If I so much as disappear from the room he'll whine and cry for me until I talk or he eventually finds me.
 

siggav

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I think maybe adopting an adult cat would have been better for you. Then the personality of the cat is known so you can select a laidback cat and you don't have to go through the kitten stage.

The kitten is behaving completely normally for a kitten, they can be mad balls of energy and that is not their fault. He's basically a baby now and will be getting into everything and acting like a, well the healthy young little predator he is.

With the litterbox usually cat poo doesn't smell that bad if the cat is healthy, cat diarreah and loose stools really stink but if you're feeding quality foods and the kitten has settled (kittens often get loose stools and some tummy problems when they move to their new homes, just the shock of the new environment is enough + they often get different foods there as well) it shouldn't be gag inducing.

If you can you could try to use the fact that you now have the kitten to loosen up a bit. I.e you can't have your environment 100% under control when you're living with a cat. I enjoy that, I mean it can be frustrating but it's also good to learn to be more flexible.

As for the scratching post don't have it on stand by start now with trying to get your kitten to use it (playing with toys on it usually helps to get them the idea) you want the kitten perferably to never start scratching furniture.

All cats need to scratch, it's a part of their nature to mark territory that way and stretch properly and get the sheathes off their claws. I would also start now learning how to trim the claws on the kitten. Snipping the razor tips off doesn't hurt the cat at all but will help you quite a bit. If you start when the kitten is young they'll usually learn to accept it and it wont become a problem when the cat is older.

I always cut the nails on my cat when she's sleepy, she's used to me fondling her paws so I just get it over with and she barely wakes up.

If you want to keep things more under control, play more with the cat. I.e the cat will run around like mad and you shouldn't try to stop that but you can try to control a little when he's at the most active by playing with him when you want him to be active. If you tire him out enough he'll be out like a light when you're done. That might take quite a while though.

Also especially if your cat is an indoor one (and he should be that, atleast for now while he's a kitten) that your house is now a zoo enclosure. Your cats entire world is you and your girlfriend and your house and just like zoo animals can get "cabin fever" and go somewhat insane if not given enough interaction and a suitable environment that can happen to your cat as well.

You're sharing your live with a small furry predator now, which is a priviledge and a great experience. You'll get to see him grow up and his personality come out even more and if you spend time on the bond between you the trust and relationship that can develop is amazing.

ETA: Also how old is the kitten? He sounds quite young. There is one thing you might consider as well. Getting a second kitten. Yep, might sound mad but if you have two kittens they'll be able to play with each other and spend time together so they're not as hugely dependent on you. Doesn't mean they won't want to be around you or play with you, just the demand isn't quite as relentless.
 

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Originally Posted by Catnip

What you're describing is normal kitten behaviour. If you find his energy or crying too distracting then maybe spend more time playing with him therefore tiring him out. He sounds like he might be a bit lonely if he follows you into the bathroom.

I love it when they're at this age. When cats get older they tend to start sleeping way more and they're not as much fun so you should enjoy it while you can.

BTW no-one finds cat poo pleasant. I have had to clean up some horrific things but again you need to decide whether you're willing to do that in exchange for the joys cats bring into your life.
yea he is being a kitten,at that age. i dont think you can tire them out.
a cat is a living breathing thing. that has its own mind. he is still learning his world.

I have not found that age stops the cat from wanting to be with you.
just this morning, i had all 4 sitting in the bathroom with me( like i needed there help) he is following you cause he wants to be with you.

i would suggest you take tin can, put some coins in it and bang that. when he is getting into things he is not supposed to , like the wires. much better then the water(as that can cause infection if it gets in the ears), and i know it sounds dumb, but learn to hiss like a cat it works

he has lots of learning to do, and the teaching process takes time and effort.
and just cause you have the stuff for him to claw on does not mean he knows that is what is there for..it took me several months to teach eazy what he can claw on and what he cant. it can be a long process.

and what are going to do when he gets sick? and he fights you over giving him a pill? or the fights over teaching him its of for you to trim his claws?

as for the video games, really what is more important a living breathing animals that wants your attention or somethign you wont care about in a few months? i had my cats step on and switch off my computer in a 40 man raid in world of warcraft.. man was i mad then, but now it funny.
just last weekend http://thecatsite.com/forums/showthread.php?t=147978 and they are no longer kittens.

having a pet and doing your job as a owner can be alot of work sometimes.
lol sometimes i wish the wife would go , and just leave the cats, they listen better
 
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freezebyte

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Whats fustrating is that I took him to the vet my parents recommended to have him checked over yesterday, especially his kitten cold and the vet told me he was younger then I thought he was. The adoptions papers stated he was born around Sep 7, which put him at around 9-10 weeks. But when the vet weighed him, he was at 1.5 pounds and the vet says he more like like 6-7. Well damnit! I learned earlier on that you shouldn't adopt a kitten before 8 weeks at minimum. Plus he stated that because he's so young, I shouldn't clip his fingernails until he's older AND he stated that even though he had his first shots, because he is so young that we'll have to start ALL OVER again on the shots.

My vet also highly recommended getting him declawed after a few months. I stated that ALOT of people have issues with that and cats seem not to fair well. He shrugged and said it makes cats more "homely" especially aggressive ones. He said people are 50/50 on the issue. My girlfriend had both clawed and declawed cats and she said had good luck with declawed cuts. Im not sure after reading all the horror stories on the web about it.

I may just go ahead and start giving him light trims right now, just to spare my poor skin cause hes having a hard time understanding NO for climbing on our legs.
 

theimp98

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Originally Posted by Freezebyte

Whats fustrating is that I took him to the vet my parents recommended to have him checked over yesterday, especially his kitten cold and the vet told me he was younger then I thought he was. The adoptions papers stated he was born around Sep 7, which put him at around 9-10 weeks. But when the vet weighed him, he was at 1.5 pounds and the vet says he more like like 6-7. Well damnit! I learned earlier on that you shouldn't adopt a kitten before 8 weeks at minimum. Plus he stated that because he's so young, I shouldn't clip his fingernails until he's older AND he stated that even though he had his first shots, because he is so young that we'll have to start ALL OVER again on the shots.

My vet also highly recommended getting him declawed after a few months. I stated that ALOT of people have issues with that and cats seem not to fair well. He shrugged and said it makes cats more "homely" especially aggressive ones. He said people are 50/50 on the issue. My girlfriend had both clawed and declawed cats and she said had good luck with declawed cuts. Im not sure after reading all the horror stories on the web about it.

I may just go ahead and start giving him light trims right now, just to spare my poor skin cause hes having a hard time understanding NO for climbing on our legs.
lol just play with his paws now,and let him get used to it. buy the time you need to trim them he wont fight much(at least he should not) just read up on how to do it first. Most people here are VERY anti declaw, it takes a little effort to teach them, But its been months and months since any of mine clawed anything beyond what they are supposed to .

oh yea, new kitten =blood, i think its a demand from the cat god(ok kidding about that part) but yea, i have had more then a few marks left..

one word, for the next few months., blue jeans well ok maybe that is 2 words.
blue jeans=armour


he will grow out of this, which is really to bad, they are fun to watch at that age.
 

siggav

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Please don't declaw the cat, if you've read the horror stories online I won't have to go into what can happen, but yeah training and claw trimming should be more than enough.

I would actually not really trust that vet if he recommends declawing, he's obviously not thinking about what's best for the cat. Declawing is actually a criminal offence where I live (UK) and is classified as animal abuse over here.

He is very young since he's 6-7 weeks. The period from around 6-12 weeks is crucial in the cat learning how to get along with others. That's also when they learn to control their bites and claws when playing. It's by far easiest to have them learn that from other kittens and their mum which is why it's recommended that they stay with their littermates and mother until 12 weeks.

Him crying to be with you at all times is completely normal then, he is a baby and wants to be with you, he'll grow out of the very extreme clingyness most likely but for now you probably have to indulge him.

btw my cat doesn't really understand No! but she understands hissing very well so next time he does something wrong, try hissing at him. It may even surprise you how he reacts, i.e he'll probably take it as a real sign that you're very upset.
 
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freezebyte

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Originally Posted by Siggav

btw my cat doesn't really understand No! but she understands hissing very well so next time he does something wrong, try hissing at him. It may even surprise you how he reacts, i.e he'll probably take it as a real sign that you're very upset.
Worth a shot I guess...getting tired of spraying him anyway.
 

theimp98

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Originally Posted by Siggav

btw my cat doesn't really understand No! but she understands hissing very well so next time he does something wrong, try hissing at him. It may even surprise you how he reacts, i.e he'll probably take it as a real sign that you're very upset.
mine do understand NO,but if you hiss at Eazy he run of with tail between his legs,and making some meeping sounds.


see like i said, learn to hiss, it sounds dumb, but it works
 

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I have had problems with the whole clawing thing in the past with my cats. I use Softpaws. They are little caps that glue on to the cat's nails. they are really easy to put on, and they stop any harmful scratching. The cat can still go through the motions so they can stretch and all that but no scratched furniture or legs. But you should also train the kitten what is appropriate and what isn't that way if you run out you aren't in trouble. The softpaws give you the effects of a declawed cat without the cruelty to your baby. Also, as far as energy goes get a laser pointer and be prepared for your sides to hurt you will laugh so much!! A cat really can be a wonderful companion! Just give both of you some time to adjust.
 

dragoriana

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Everything you have described is normal kitten behaviour. And being that you've never had a cat before, getting one at that age is going to be a very big adjustment for you. There isn't alot of advice that can really be given in terms of its behaviour. Kittens claw, chew, climb, poop etc. They grow out of most of it. You have to learn to be patient with your cat. If you are lucky, eventually you will form a bond with it and love it, and never want to let it go, and any problems that arise don't seem so big in the future.

And like others have said, please do not declaw, there are many alternatives. Softpaws, trimming, if kitty is indoor/enclosure get logs/scratching posts to encourage them away from furniture.

Also a big tip is get the kitty used t your touch around its ears, paws and mouth. That is a big help for future vet visits and nail trimming, flea treatments, tablets etc
 

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On the nail trimming you can go ahead and get them use to the trimming young. We started trimming Pong's claws when we first got her (4-5 weeks old rescue). 4 months later I can trim her claws in her sleep without her batting an eye. Ping I did not start trimming his claws till he was closer to a year old and it took longer for him to get used to it. Now tho I can trim his claws in his sleep.

As for all the other stuff you brought up sounds normal to me. And you have only had him a week or so so give it time. You are not used to cats and their behaviors. Give it some more time.
 

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Good luck with the kitten phase. It will pass, but I have to say this is one reason I have always preferred to adopt adults. Also sounds like the little tyke is lonely.

On another note, I just have to say that if any vet suggested declawing to me, I would be finding another vet.
 

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Welcome to the wonderful crazy world of kitties!! It sounds like you're just overwhelmed by it all and need some encouragement, a place to ask questions, and a place to vent. You've come to the right place!!

I haven't owned kitties my whole life; I grew up with dogs and the 2 are quite different. So when my first cat adopted me, I was very overwhelmed with kitty-ness, too! Take a deep breath, count to 10, and laugh at all the craziness. Pick your battles. Decide what's important, love for the kitty and his unconditional love for you. Even being a self described somewhat loner, you can probably appreciate the fact that this little guy has already adopted you. Also, kitties at this age (and some even as they age) have the attention span of a gnat!! The great thing is that they're easily distracted if they're doing something wrong and you need to redirect them!

Not all kitties will scratch and shred things. I adopted a cat at 6 mos of age and she's never once clawed or shredded any piece of furniture or human in our house. We've provided her with several different types of scratching mats and she's used those. You can teach your kitty "NO", but it takes a LONG time, esp. starting with a kitty so young. I use a can filled with dry beans to bang and get my kitty's attention when she's doing something wrong. Then, I usually have to physically move her from where she's doing what she's not supposed to be doing to a more appropriate place. (Ex: She's not to be on the counter. When she jumps up there, I shake the can, tell her in a stern voice {not yelling} "NO! Down, Hannah!" If she doesn't get down, I pick her up {not in anger} and put her on the floor and scoot her out of the kitchen.)

To help with the lonliness, you might get your guy a little stuffed animal with no parts he could chew off. That might help him feel like he has a surrogate friend. Since he's so young, you may want to get a piece of fabric and make like a sling across your body over one shoulder and let him sleep in there. He needs warmth and hearing your heartbeat will help him feel more secure.

Make sure you have plenty of litter boxes for him. When Hannah was younger, I used disposable aluminum foil trays found in the kitchen utensil aisle at the store. They're cheap and they're disposable! (Or, if you're really tight on money, you can wash them and re-use them.) I used the 9x13 inch size and placed them in every room of the house. I used a plain clay, non-clumping litter. When a kitty has to go potty, they have to go...NOW! They don't have the control of their functions like an adult kitty, so they can't "hold it" until they get to the box. As he grows older, you can gradually decrease the number of trays you need.

Lastly, please don't declaw your kitty. Shame on your vet for even saying that!! I have a cat who came to me declawed. It hasn't necessarily made her more homey, it's made her fearful of people and a scaredy-cat in general. If I'd adopted her as a kitty, I'd not have had her declawed. You just have to keep the nails trimmed. We try to do it about every 2 weeks in my house.

Stephanie
 

gingersmom

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Originally Posted by JellyBella

Good luck with the kitten phase. It will pass, but I have to say this is one reason I have always preferred to adopt adults. Also sounds like the little tyke is lonely.

On another note, I just have to say that if any vet suggested declawing to me, I would be finding another vet.


I'd DEFINITELY look for a new vet.

When I adopted Ginger she was "approximately" 8 weeks old. She was tiny, and crazy for MONTHS. For a long while after I kept thinking, what the heck have I done, adopting a little kitten, am I CRAZY? But I stuck it out, and she did calm down with time, especially after she was spayed, and I love her to pieces and can't imagine not having her in my life.

So please hang in there! And come vent on TCS when you need to!
 

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He's way too young to learn to behave to any real extent - he has no IDEA of what it means to 'stop' being himself, into everything, with no consciousness of danger (or getting yelled at, sprayed, etc). He won't connect punishment with anything he does even 5 seconds after he does it, so you need to make a decision quickly - if you don't want him and the coming next year of 'wildness' (to whatever extent) you maybe need to find a safe home for him now - NOT a shelter or SPCA please!
 

kittieshasme

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I have to admit - I'm jealous. My youngest cat, Elijah, is 10 years old and rarely gets the 'zoomies' anymore. Zoomies are when the kitten races through the livingroom, over the couch, up the curtains, back down and out down the hall (for example). Over the life of a cat the kitten stage is pretty short so enjoy it while you can. Of course, part of the enjoyment is knowing it's temporary and having great memories to look back on.

Learning to hiss is a great idea. It really does work.

A second kitten would keep him - have you said what his name is? - company and they will wear each other out. However, you will still have two kitty commandos and additional litter box, etc. to cope with. I always have multiple cats so this doesn't bother me.

Whenever we chose to share are lives and homes with other creatures there will be compromises on both sides. Good luck with your kitten and remember 10 years from now you'll wonder where the 'zoomies' went.
 

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Welcome to the wonderful world of cats.


Everyone is right - you have a young baby and the growing pains are just starting. It sounds as though he has bonded closely with you which is really wonderful. I also agree he would benefit from having a buddy.


It is important to ensure that he knows what a scratching post is for so early training is good. Cat trees are also great. My hubby built one that has 2 closed "houses" and our two love it.

I've always only ever had one cat at a time until Bijou and Mika - now I wonder why I only had one when 2 are so much better. I have 2 litter boxes (although most folks recommend 3 boxes - one per cat plus a spare since some kitties don't like to pee and poo in the same box). Cleaning 2 litter boxes is no biggie - takes and extra minute each night.

Litter - one poster mentioned using clay litter. I personally will not use clay litter, especially for young kittens. Clay is dusty, they breathe in the dust or sometimes will ingest the clay where it draws moisture from their bodies and forms clumps. If the lumps do not get passed from the digestive system or a clump forms in the lungs, it will require surgery to fix or in the lung can actually cause death.

I was using clay litter when we got Bijou and after hearing him sneezing in the litter box, I immediately changed to Swheat Scoop which I found too dusty still and now use WBCL.
 
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