Playing or Fighting

Bingley (approx. 2-3 years old) adopted me last January and we both adopted Pippin (6 months old) in August. They seem to get along just fine but when they "fight" I can't tell if they are playing or fighting. They seem kind of rough with each other, but they don't appear to be using their claws, I rarely hear sounds out of them, and although they bite/nip at each other neither appear to have ever been hurt. At first Pippin did all the "attacking" but now Bingley seems to be doing his fair share of starting things. They are both neutered males. Am I being a helicopter mom? Should I just let them "battle" it out or should I step in?

Any advice/experience would be helpful.

Well, I just adopted a cat, 11 mos. in Sept. My older cat did not like him at first and they DON'T play, but fight. They hiss, growl and go at each other letting out screams, so they're not playing. I would say, compared to how my cats behave, your cats are just playing. They can be a little rough sometimes, but I think, as long as fur isn't flying, no claws and they're not hissing and growling, I wouldn't worry! Let em' play.

I think the main rule is that if you have any doubt, then they're playing.

Cats fighting for real can't be mistaken really, fur flies, there is hissing and screaming and it looks very serious.

It sounds like their playing to me?.

If Rosie and Jack are wrestling and Rosie's had enough she get's up and walks away, but if Jack keeps pouncing on her she tells him she's had enough by giving him a quick hiss and he backs off

If they're not hurting each other then they're not fighting - if they wanted to make each other bleed, they would!

My 2 look as if they're being really horrible to each other fairly frequently - a lot of smacking, pinning down and biting the neck, and nipping each other on the leg or back. Sonic can also be pretty vocal about it, growling and screaming sometimes - he's not the sort of cat to keep his opinion to himself. But claws are always retracted. Actually I'm not sure that Radar has ever realised that his claws are able to be extended at all, he's a gentle creature.

What I see and what you are seeing is fairly normal dominance/play behaviour. There is a bit of seriousness to it in that one cat is usually telling the other 'I'm in charge' or 'this is my chair', but the intention is not to cause one another injury.

Originally Posted by Rosiemac

It sounds like their playing to me?.

If Rosie and Jack are wrestling and Rosie's had enough she get's up and walks away, but if Jack keeps pouncing on her she tells him she's had enough by giving him a quick hiss and he backs off

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you know i always wonder, heyu hiss at eazy all the time,
but there does seem to be different hmm tone of a hiss that once she does that eazy runs off.

like when he goes to get next to her on the chair, or he wants her spot on my bed

If only we knew what those hisses were really saying?

Originally Posted by Siggav

I think the main rule is that if you have any doubt, then they're playing.

Cats fighting for real can't be mistaken really, fur flies, there is hissing and screaming and it looks very serious.

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That sounds true. When I've heard/seen other cats fighting, you are right that there is no doubt they are fighting.

When my boys go at each other they tumble all over the place (a lamp has been knocked over so many times that it has had to be moved), so they are very mobile, but there are never any injuries.

Thank you everyone! I feel a lot more relaxed about it. I've been so nervous about making sure they will live well together. I think it is time to just relax and enjoy them.