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Future 3rd kitty?

post #1 of 6
Thread Starter 
This is all completely hypothical at this point, so I wasn't really sure where to post it. If it needs to be moved, then that's fine.

I know I eventually want a third kitty. This won't even begin to happen for another couple of years because my apartment complex only allows a maximum of 2 pets. (I can only hope they raise the limit!)

So, my possible problem is Possum. I think Loki would be fine because he seems to just want friends, and he seemed to accept Possum way before Possum stopped hissing at him. Poor guy walked around for a few days looking upset and bewildered like he was thinking, "Why doesn't he want to be friends?" He did back off from me a little bit, but that may have been because a lot of major things happened to him in a short time.

From what I know Possum has lived with multiple cats. He didn't do so well in a cattery-like environment, apparently, but did much better in a foster home. I don't know much about foster pet homes, but it may have been a bit chaotic. He does fantastically here. He absolutely loves Loki. He also absolutely loves me, which is good, but he seems like he has a jealous streak. This streak does seem to have let up a bit concerning Loki. Possum also seems to be a bit needy.

If I adopted another cat it would probably be around Loki's and Possum's then ages; may a little younger, but 2 at the very least. They are 2 and nearly 3 now. I honestly don't have any interest in kittens. I suspect that if I brought another animal Possum would be very upset. Possum very much feels that he's deserves the top position in my life, and he's somewhat clingy.

Is there anything I can do to determine his ability to accept another cat? Possum was originally here on a trial adoption basis in case he and Loki didn't like each other, but I know most places don't do that, and I seriously doubt I'll be living here, where I got Possum, when I'll be ready for another cat.

Am I nuts to wonder about this so early? Also, if I did get a third kitty, what if I suddenly won't "feel complete" until I got four?

post #2 of 6
Thread Starter 
Anyone have an idea?
post #3 of 6
IMO its better to have an even amount of pets so if they pair off, then no one will be left out

So if you adopt in the future, maybe consider getting littermates (and them being spayed/neutered before they join the family).
post #4 of 6
The first step is to figure out what types your present cats are.


It's best not to make too much of a type change with a new cat. If you have a Beta and a Gamma, like I did when I picked out a new kitten, it's best to go with a type which matches one of the present cats. I got a Beta kitten, who is becoming good friends with Mr. Bond. This leaves out my Gamma, but he doesn't care about cat companionship, anyway. Gammas often don't; they are far more people oriented that way.

It sounds like Possum also has insecurity issues, and I don't blame him. However, he did weather another cat already. If the other cat is going to be looking for cat companionship, Loki is available. This will actually take some of the stress off of Possum, so that he doesn't have to accept the new cat right away. The new cat can turn to Loki for that.

Follow proper introductions so that the cats will build their curiosity to overcome their misgivings.

Choosing the right cat will mean getting one who is friendly with Loki, and not upset by Possum's distance. Treat the new cat as a plus, not a potential minus. There will be more toys, more treats, more of whatever the cats enjoy now. If you make sure Possum keeps getting his special attentions that mean so much to him, he will be able to handle another cat.

Or, even more.

I've found that more cats actually makes things easier. If you are interested in my views, I have just written a blog post about it:


There's nothing wrong with wanting more cats! People often have a hard time with the second cat, and worry about adding more, when, in fact, the more cats you have, the easier it is. That means there's another cat when you need them, each with their special gifts.

It also means there's another cat when another cat needs that. We cover all our bases with more cats. If we choose wisely, and handle it properly, it can wind up better for all concerned.
post #5 of 6
Thread Starter 
That's really fascinating, Werebear!

I think I have a Beta (Possum) and and Alpha (Loki) on my hands. Possum does seems to be the dominant one in the relationship, though.

Yeah, Possum does have insecurity issues, but he does know what he wants. He wants me.

Loki is a very sweet boy and seems to have a "mothering"/older brother thing going on with Possum. Even with me. He likes to groom me.

Also, maybe I wasn't clear, but Possum was the added cat. Loki was my first, Possum was my second. Does that change your opinion any? After Possum got comfortable he really latched onto Loki and then me. Apparently, once he decides he likes you and trusts you, then you don't get to not love him.

post #6 of 6
Apparently, once he decides he likes you and trusts you, then you don't get to not love him.
That's great!

The "types" don't have anything to do with dominance. From what I've read about feral cat colonies, and my own observances, cats don't have dominance hierarchies that are as clear cut as as dogs are. In my experience, there are cats who dominate at mealtime, but they don't have to be the cats who claim the highest bookshelf, and they might not be the same cat who monopolizes the toys. It's all about what is most important to them, and what they want to make a fuss over.

The "bossy" behavior you are seeing in Possum can be an outgrowth of a Beta's fondness for supervision. Mr. Bond, my older Beta, has worked out the best ways to do things, and likes to show his Beta kitten, RJ, "the ropes." He's given up on expecting interaction from Puffy, who is a total Gamma.

I worked out the types to help me in placing cats in new homes, which I used to do a lot of, and also in helping people to choose new cats that would fit in with their existing ones. I'm glad you enjoyed it!
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