Needing support, just lost beloved cat

maggie5

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2 days ago I lost my 16 1/2 year old cat, Lyndsey. He had been on heart medicine since May 2007 and I just felt so good about how he had been doing. But then last Saturday he threw up and his breathing was labored. He had maybe 1 or 2 days last week that were good and the doctor increased his medicine. But then 2 days ago, he laid down on the floor and kept meowing really low. He seemed dazed and then he ran to the basement. Once he was down there, he kept meowing and panting. He peed on the floor, which he's never done in 16 years. I took him to the emergency vet and they gave him a pain med (shot). The vet said he seemed like he had pain in his abdomen and fluid around his lungs. We went home and he seemed to get worse with his breathing. His breathing was very fast and it sounded like he was squeaking. My husband and I decided that was enough and we took him to the vet and had him put to sleep. Has anyone experienced this? I feel sick and empty. I can't eat or sleep. Nothing helps and I keep second guessing myself. Has anyone felt like this?
 

brokenheart

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Oh Maggie5, I'm so sorry. There are a lot of people here who know the heartache you're experiencing and unfortunately, it seems like a lot of us are going through it just this week. My cat died on Tuesday night.

I know, too, how wrenching it is when you're optimistic they're getting better and suddenly they're gone.

It's horrible to feel as bad as we do, but I think it's 100% normal. How could we love them and NOT feel this way when we lose them?
 
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maggie5

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I'm so sorry you lost your cat on Tuesday night. I am thankful to know there are people out there who feel the way I do. When Lyndsey got sick last May, I thought I was starting the grief process because he was sick. But then he bounced back for awhile and I was so joyful. Then when he started to go downhill in August, I knew what was going to come and I started thinking about his death and trying to prepare. But NOTHING prepared me for what I would feel every minute of every day.
 

taterbug

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I'm so sorry for your loss! Rest in peace sweet Lyndsey. May your meowmy find comfort knowing you will feel no more pain and are now playing with all of our babies over the bridge, waiting for that happy reunion! Please know you are not alone and that you did the right thing.
 

brokenheart

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Originally Posted by maggie5

But NOTHING prepared me for what I would feel every minute of every day.
I know. Grief is very frightening because it's so huge.
 
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maggie5

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Has anyone experienced crazy thoughts when their cat died? I keep thinking I see him and thinking I just want to hold him one more time.
 

eeeegeeee

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Dear Maggie,
I lost my Edwina 11 days ago; she was 15. I cried horribly the first 5-6 days, especially when I came home and she was not there to greet me. It is so quiet at home. She was in pain and she collapsed the day that I took her to be euthanized. That was such a difficult decision...I wished she died in her sleep...but she is out of pain...as is your dear sweet kitty. Each day I feel a little bit better but I still miss her horribly; I try to think of happy times with her when I feel myself about to cry; that helps me a lot. Please try to think of the happiest times with your kitty. And if you need to cry, cry.
 

xocats

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Originally Posted by maggie5

Has anyone experienced crazy thoughts when their cat died? I keep thinking I see him and thinking I just want to hold him one more time.
Seven years ago, when my beloved Bartholomew died at age 16 of heart failure, my heart was broken.

I kept hearing him meow.
I could feel him, smell him and would have given my life to spend just a few more minutes with him.
I still miss my sweet boy.

We understand how you are feeling.

I am so sorry for your loss.
Rest in peace beloved Lyndsey.
 

rosiemac

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I'm so very sorry for your loss, and your at the right place to get comfort and to talk about things


Play happily at the bridge Lyndsey, but keep looking down on those who love and miss you so much


________________________________________
 

pumpkinsmommie

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Originally Posted by maggie5

Has anyone experienced crazy thoughts when their cat died? I keep thinking I see him and thinking I just want to hold him one more time.
I lost my baby last Monday to cancer. We had to make that horrible decision to put her to sleep. This evening I was laying in bed and my husband was next to me and moved his foot and it felt just like when Pumpkin would jump up on the bed for snuggle time. I just turned my head really quickly thinking Pumpkin was back and then I realized it was just his foot. I started to cry again.

And as I write this I'm crying all over again.

Alison
 

duchess15

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I'm sooo sorry about your kitty. We lost duchess 2 years ago from kidney failure. She was doing so well for months, then within a day she had gone downhill so fast. I didn't even have time to let it sink in because I was at work and my parents (thankfully) were home with her.
Tedi was diagnosed this March with a heart murmur and put on medication in July. He just turned 15 in march and your story just scares me!
It is always hard to lose one and you never can really ever prepare yourself, but if you had any doubts of him being in pain, then I think you did what was best for him. It will take time to heal, but it will. There is no shame in crying over someone you loved.
 

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I'm so very sorry for your loss.
It's not unusual to question whether or not you did the right thing but from what you said about his condition I believe you made the right decision to set him free.

RIP Lyndsey
 

stormy

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I am so sorry for your loss.


I had a similar situation with my RB kitty Roo. She had a inoperable tumor in her sinus and seem to be doing well for about a month, but suddenly she started acting frantic and running around the house, rushed her to the vet and she had to be PTS. It is such a difficult thing to go through but ultimately it is the best and most loving thing we can do for our furkids to let them go when it is time.


RIP sweet angel
 
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maggie5

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I hope no one minds if I keep talking about Lyndsey. It is just so nice to know that there are others going through the heart ache of this grief. It feels unending. I also feel like I would give my life to have a moment back with him. I held him and kissed him and wish I could just see him one more time. I called the vet today because I needed to hear her say that I did the right thing. My mind gets blurry and I needed to hear it. She said he was in pain and it hurt when she touched his belly. I, too, think I hear him or see him. He always loved to go out and roll around in the sun in our driveway. Today it was sunny and I kept thinking about how much he would love it out there. The night time is the worst.
 

xocats

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Originally Posted by maggie5

I hope no one minds if I keep talking about Lyndsey.
Of course no one minds.
You are not alone here.

We understand.
 
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maggie5

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Thank you. I called off work for tomorrow. I just can't fathom the idea that I would have to go a pretend everything is okay. Is that crazy? I was looking at pictures of Lyndsey when he was a kitten. I got him when he was 4 weeks old. The lady who was giving him away told me that he was a girl and he was so tiny and puffy that I didn't know until his first vet visit that she was a he. Thus, his name - Lyndsey. He was such an awesome friend and he was never sick a day in his life until May of this year. The doctor said he could live 6 months to 2 years with his heart disease. All I heard was 2 years. Now my house is too quiet. He always like to sit on the rug in front of the kitchen sink and I keep looking for him.
 

xocats

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Be sure to read the sticky threads at the beginning the The Bridge forum.
You will cry but you will also find understanding.
 
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maggie5

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I can't seem to go anywhere yet I can't stand being at home. I keep wanting to see Lyndsey on the bed, or the kitchen rug in front of the sink. I went out back to visit his grave but somehow that made me feel worse. I feel him more inside my house. The emergency vet sent us a card today. That was so nice but sent me into a crying spell again. I have to go back to work tomorrow. It feels wrong somehow, like I'm moving on by going on with life. It's very hard. Lyndsey used to come hang out with my husband at night. He took to sitting on his chest. John told me today how quiet and lonely he's been the last two nights.
 

mzjazz2u

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I'm so sorry for your loss. I totally understand how you're feeling. I lost Jake a few weeks ago and it was the hardest thing. It still is. But the first couple weeks was unbareable.
 
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