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Cybele and Freya are gone :(

post #1 of 20
Thread Starter 

The breeder's husband called me today... it seems that for a week the babies' condition had worsened despite their best efforts to help them and feed them manually. I was in close contact with the breeder, in fact almost every day.

The infection in the mother was caught too late and it had already traveled in the maternal milk before they could seperate the babies and the moter. Last Saturday, a small one was euthanized. Today the breeder and her husband decided to stop the sufferance of the other babies who have gotten worse and worse since then...

I am in total shock. I know she sort of lied to me because she didn't want to alarm me for nothing had they saved the babies, but I was also angry. I could hear her cry in the background while her husband apologized about 1000 times for the situation and the fact they hid their true condition. He told me she was simply incapable of telling me the truth, as she knew it would destroy me inside and she was herself completely annihilated ... at this point I was both frustrated and incredibly sad.

I've been following both the mother's progress as well as the babies since their Birth, all of that since early June. I've been preparing for their arrival with anticipation and extreme excitement for weeks... as stupid as it sound, it feels like I've lost something important...

How fair is life sometimes Now if you would exscuse me, I'm going to put my fist through a wall. Serves me right for getting crazily attached so fast.
post #2 of 20
Oh how devastating and incredibly sad. I just have no words, but I'm thinking of you.
post #3 of 20
Aw Sweetie I am so very sorry. I know you were looking forward to bringing those babies home. May they all Rest In Peace.

You are not studpid at all to love and you will love and open your heart to some more babies again. Again I am so sorry.
post #4 of 20
I'm sorry you lost the babies, but you must keep in mind that the breeder did what was best, & she's as upset(if not more) than you.
post #5 of 20
Thread Starter 
I wasn't trying to be insensitive, but as a doctor in formation, I admire the quality of someone who is honest upfront about the evolution of someone's health, and I would have appreciated to know the truth. I believe the shock would have been lessened.

It was of course the best thing to do to deliver those poor babies out of their misery, but I feel quite dumb to have attached myself so much to them. I know have that huge Condo and all their toys that I had bought specifically for them... feels like false labor, as crazy as it sounds.

The husband told me the 2nd of their three female gave birth to 6 kitten on September 8th and that they will of course keep two of them for me. It's just that when he used the terms "We have a replacement warranty as you were already aware..". "Replacement Warranty?". I mean , they're not video consoles !

I know I'll open my heart to some other babies, but I feel jynxed... first time I wanted to adopt kitten, I get so atatched, and this happens... does this even happen frequently?
post #6 of 20
Oh you get attached, whether they live with you or not. I'm very very attached to quite a few of the shelter kitties. It's normal for you to get so attached.

I mean, if you were to walk into the local shelter, I guarantee there is at least one kitty you would get attched to, even if you were only there 5 minutes.
post #7 of 20
Well, the husband is probably trying to talk in more business terms because it's so emotionally difficult for them too.

It actually does happen like that with prebreds more often than you would think, but it's not as tragic - sometimes the breeder ends up keeping a cat for their program, accidentally promises it to someone else, or there are problems getting together to either ship or pick up the kitty.
post #8 of 20
I am so sorry on the passing of Cybele and Freya. They were darling little ones and your excitement about adding them to your family was evident in your posts.

Pyometra is extremely dangerous and often fatal. It is one of the biggest risks associated with having a non-spayed female, even without a pregnancy.

As another that values honesty, I understand your anger. No matter how hard the breeders thought it would be, they should have told you the truth. No excuses.

The fact that you got so attached goes to show what a fantastic kitty parent you are going to be! It does hurt when we lose them, but they enrich our lives beyond measure.
post #9 of 20
Thread Starter 
Thanks for all the support... I do appreciate it.

What also didn't help was my friend who's in vet school... when I asked about it, he sugar coated things so I wouldn't worry... I guess both he and the breeder were thinking about my best interests... still, truth > sugarcoat.

I'll move on slowly while making new room for the two hopefully healthy babies I will be getting around November 4th.
post #10 of 20
Oh my goodness, thats so horrible! I am SO sorry, my heart goes out to you and their breeder. I can understand why you would feel foolish caring for them. I broke down when I found out I may not get to keep my kitten. It's amazing how attached you can get just hearing about the babies that are soon to be a huge part of your life....never feel bad for falling in love!

I am so very sorry for your loss. I know it's hard right now but try to find it in yourself to forgive your breeder. I think she was so pained over their state that she couldn't bring herself to tell you. She should have told you the truth, it was wrong of her to hold it back...but I am sure she's hurting so much right now, she probably thought she was doing you a favor by sparing you the worry while she was getting them help. Wrong, I agree, but her intentions weren't bad.

I'm sending you good vibes! ::
post #11 of 20
I am very sorry for your loss. Please don't feel stupid for becoming so attached to them; it just shows that you already loved them very much.

post #12 of 20
As a doctor in formation, I think you will find that one of the most valuable lessons to keep in mind is that honesty is a wonderful thing ... so long as your malpractice premiums are paid to current. *wink*

All kidding aside, the grieving process in humans will sometimes makes us say and do things that aren't always the best things for us to do or say. Forgive her for her seemingly well-intentioned mistake and allow her to be human.

Will you be taking two of the babies from the September 8th litter from the same breeder then or will you be looking elsewhere?
post #13 of 20
Thread Starter 
I've decided to give them a second chance... so we will see from there.

As for malpractice insurance, I'm Canadian and we do not have to deal with the average joe's greed and tendancy to sue for malpractice for just about anything. Although I could make sligtly more money over in the U.S., I'd hate to have to deal with all the stress with idiots wanting to abuse and manipulate the system to make any money they can. I consider those who do sue at the first chance they get only for the money to be the biggest losers in the World.
post #14 of 20
I am so sorry.
post #15 of 20
I'm so sorry for your loss if you hadn't gotten attached to them you wouldn't be human. RIP Cybele & Freya
post #16 of 20

I am so sorry to hear this and very sorry for your loss. I can only imagine how you must be feeling.

Please don't feel foolish for getting attached to those babies. They were beautiful and they were to be yours so it's only natural.

Everything happens for a reason and I'm hoping your new babies will be healthy and everything you could hope for.

post #17 of 20
Am sorry to hear of the loss. I was not right to withhold info from you and send you pictures. She should have been more truthful. Maybe this never happened to her cats before and she was really upset and afraid to tell you as you might think she's a bad person.

I am glad you are sticking with her and getting some new kittens later. I hope things work out a lot better this time around
post #18 of 20
Originally Posted by TigerLord View Post
as stupid as it sound, it feels like I've lost something important...
It doesn't sound stupid; you did lose something important. Don't let it harden your heart though. Make room to welcome the new ones in.
post #19 of 20
Thread Starter 
I received semi good news today. Since the breeder also has a private "kindergarten" at Home, she was able to attend to the kitten. However, Bali had chronic diahrea and cleaning feces over the house 20 times a day was just too much for her. Besides, with the cost of having to put Bali in a specialized hospital for animals under continuous IV and antibiotics would have cost them too much, and they didn't want her to suffer.

However an hour before they set off to the vet a friend of them came over and said he wanted to take Bali home. He's sort of rich, and said he would invest what it would cost and do whatever it takes to save her- fortunately for her, she still has a chance to live a normal life! She will be spayed of course with a radical hysterectomie, but she might still live. That brought a lot of warmth to my heart.

It was too late for the kitten though, no matter what. As you all know, the immune system of kitten is extremely fragile and dependent of maternal milk, which they didn't get in enough quantity, and were on top of that infected. On the other hand, the breeder got a new Siamese female from where they had purchased Bali ... and they named the new one Cybele - they really liked the name. How touching

That's something I guess...
post #20 of 20
I'm so sorry for your loss, they were beautiful babies and I know how excited you were about bringing them home.

I hope that the new kittens will fill your heart as much as Freya and Cybele did.

Sorry for your loss
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