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Another update

post #1 of 27
Thread Starter 
Hey guys, just thought I'd drop in and give another update.

Physically, I'm doing ok. I'm healing and am moving much better, but some swelling has come up around one side of my incision and it's quite sore so need to go back to the obstetrician tomorrow to get it checked.

Emotionally, we're doing ok as well. It didn't all really sink in until the weekend what had happened. I guess everything happening in the hospital and the constant stream of visitors and doctors kept me occupied. Since we've been home though, we've had to pack away all the baby stuff, which was horrible. I had to put away the special outfit I'd picked out for Joshua to come home from hospital in as well as other special outfits we'd specially bought. We went back up to the hospital to properly say good-bye to him - the 2 times I saw him I was doped out from the drugs, then the second time we had other people in the room. After that we signed the cremation paperwork, and chose an urn (which is a wooden box with a teddy bear on it, and will have an engraved plaque). Nobody should ever have to go to a mortuary to choose a baby sized urn. It was so horrible.

We've also since had to deal with baby stuff arriving that we'd ordered, and relatives had sent from Australia before they found out about Joshua. Today we got something in the mail addressed to "The parents of Joshua Lawrence P". As well as that, I had a lady in my complex ask today if I'd had the baby yet and when was he due. We've had to explain what happened a few times to people and it doesn't get any easier.

Every day gets a little better though, and we'll never forget our baby, but we'll always remember him. I've actually managed to write all this without crying which is a big step...

To top it all off my cardiologist is talking about repairing my aortic aneurysm before we have another child, and we'll know more next week when we see him again, but I may be looking at open heart surgery early next year.

I don't think I'll be posting much any time in the near future. My life at the moment is revolving around healing, both physically and emotionally and there's nothing else I get excited about that I can share. I will be lurking though, and wanted to let everyone know that I really appreciate the support.

to you all
post #2 of 27
Take care of yourself, Sarah. We will miss you but will understand.
post #3 of 27
Really sorry about what you have to go through. I am glad you are doing better. Best wishes and take care as always.
post #4 of 27

Please know we are all here for you! I totally understand you taking time away....totally understandable!

Please take care and know I am thinking of you.
post #5 of 27
feel better soon Okay!
post #6 of 27
Originally Posted by katachtig View Post
Take care of yourself, Sarah. We will miss you but will understand.
I'm only a Pm away if you need an ear or a hug! Just take care of yourself and know you will stay in my thoughts and prayers!
post #7 of 27
Pop in from time to time with little updates if you can!
post #8 of 27
Many prayers for you and your DH, Sarah
post #9 of 27
*hugs* i'm glad to hear you're doing a little bit better Sarah. There's no pressure for you to hang around here, just take the time you need for yourself and hubby *hugs*
post #10 of 27
You are in my prayers hon
post #11 of 27
Your priority just now is to take care of you, and tend your healing, both physical and emotional. I'm glad to hear that you're doing reasonably well, all things considered. Take your time, and know that there are many people here holding you in our thoughts. Visit when it feels right, and when it's time for you to be back among us more regularly, you'll know, and we'll be delighted to see you. Meanwhile, be gentle with yourself.

post #12 of 27
Take all the time you need for yourself. Know that I'm thinking of you and if you need to talk you know how to reach me. *hugs*
post #13 of 27
Sarah we fully understand that you need to take some time away with what your going through.

Like i say to the members in the bridge, just take it one day at a time.

I'm pleased you've popped in to see us, and hope we see you on again soon, because remember were all here to support you
post #14 of 27
You and your husband are number one in your life, so address that. We'll miss you, but we totally understand
post #15 of 27
We all understand Sarah...take as much time as you need, and we will be thinking of you
post #16 of 27
Take as much time as you need sweetie. We'll be here for you when you come back.

and to you.

You are in my thoughts and prayers.
post #17 of 27
Originally Posted by sarahp View Post
I don't think I'll be posting much any time in the near future. My life at the moment is revolving around healing, both physically and emotionally and there's nothing else I get excited about that I can share. I will be lurking though, and wanted to let everyone know that I really appreciate the support.

to you all
We all understand. your physical and emotional health is far more important.

Take care.
post #18 of 27
Take care of yourself-thats important now.
post #19 of 27
Thanks so much for checking in, Sarah, I've been thinking about, I'm sure we all have. I'm glad you're doing ok, and like Susan said take one day at a time. I'm look forward to seeing pics of your gorgeous kitties soon!
post #20 of 27
Sarah, I can only imagine how difficult it has been, I know it took a lot
to check in with everyone! You are strong, always remember that, I'm glad you have your husband by your side, and vise versa. This will bring you closier
together, I don't know how we all survive any death? except for the grace
of God. He will bless you all... I know he will!!!! And you deserve his blessings!
Take care, and something that helped me so much, was to keep a journal,
write down all your feelings, happy, sad, mad, I have stayed up nights on end writing page after page. It really helps in every way possible! If I were mad one day, I wrote really BIG, and so on! It was good therapy!
we all care so much!
When I lost Marvin, in total confusion, someone said to me,"You know Monique, God doesn't just need old people in Heaven". It brought a smile to my face, I never thought of it like that, so I thought about how special he was, God chose him early, and how special that really was!"
You know maybe Joshua is there with Marvin, and I can promise you this, he was a fantastic
dad the few short yrs. with Jace! Marvin is probably hanging real close, and getting ready to teach Josh some baseball! Awww, that makes me feel really good!
post #21 of 27
It's lovely to hear from you again. It's so tough for you right now...TCS really isn't your first priority no matter how much we like having you here. Take care of matters in your real life first.

You're in all of our thoughts, I'm sure. Feel much better soon!
post #22 of 27
It is good to see an update from you and I am glad to hear you are healing. You have been and will continue to be in my thoughts and prayers. Take your time, we will be here when you are ready. Sending lots of love and hugs to you and your family.
post #23 of 27
Sarah, you and your family are still in my thoughts and prayers.
post #24 of 27
I`m going to miss you but you need to concentrate on recovering. I hope you will start to find things a little easier now and start to look to the future. Hope you will come back eventually.

Take care
post #25 of 27
Sarah - I think about you a lot.
post #26 of 27
Sarah- I hope you pop in from time to time, I'll keep you in my thoughts & prayers
post #27 of 27
Sarah, we will all be thinking of you. Oscar sends you lots of headbutts and Trav and I send you lots of hugs. We are here for you
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