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Keep the claws to yourself. Advice please?

post #1 of 10
Thread Starter 
My little girl Kisa is madly in love with my husband. She is definitly his cat well more like she has claimed owner ship of him lol

When he isn't home she will cry. Whenever he starts getting ready for work she runs into the kitchen and lays infront of the door trying to block it so he can't leave. So cute yet sad lol

She also is very much a lap cat. She would probably love nothing more then to sleep on my husband and only get up to eat/drink and use the litterbox lol

He has trained her alittle bit not to jump up on him when he is sitting and instead only when he is laying down. Though she still tries sometimes.

She is one of the most stubburn cats I have ever met. She acts like she doesn't understand and that the word no means nothing lol Saying no, putting her on the floor, using a water bottle, etc.. this cat will ignore you and keep trying thinking she is being sneaky- moving very slowly lol or coming from a different direction.

Anyways (took me forever to get to this lol) the real problem we have with her is that she digs her claws into you if you are holding her or if she is laying on you. This happens everytime. To the point that she has hurt us and where it is getting hard for my husband to tolerate holding her.

It isn't quite kneeding or holding on. I can't really discribe it well. I have had lots of cats that love to kneed and while it can hurt it isn't like this.

It feels like she is just trying to be super close and hold you, but with her claws out!

She is very antsy. Will not just stay still. Always trying to get right in your face, kiss you and get 150% of your attention. Which I think might be part of the reason for the claws being out that she just gets kindof love excitedness.

I am at a loss of what to do? We don't want her to stop loving to snuggle just not so much with her claws. I would never ever declaw my cats. We can't afford to get her claws trimmed from a groomer/vet all the time. And while we have trimmed her nails was just a bit too hard for us.
post #2 of 10
She probably doesn't know that she's hurting you. Cats have to learn that people don't have fur and can't tolerate their claws. The only way they have to learn that their claws hurt is for you to react appropriately -- like it hurts. Do whatever comes naturally when you get hurt -- yell, jump, jerk away, let go of her. Most cats will learn to sheath their claws when touching your skin. Hopefully she'll learn that, too.
post #3 of 10
Originally Posted by coaster View Post
She probably doesn't know that she's hurting you. Cats have to learn that people don't have fur and can't tolerate their claws. The only way they have to learn that their claws hurt is for you to react appropriately -- like it hurts. Do whatever comes naturally when you get hurt -- yell, jump, jerk away, let go of her. Most cats will learn to sheath their claws when touching your skin. Hopefully she'll learn that, too.
To add to that, do what comes naturally... but overdo it.

She sounds pretty well-adjusted, and this method isn't fantastic for say a feral or something. But when she hurts you, freak out. Cry, scream in agony, hold onto where she hurt you, act like you were shot where her claws were.

When cats are kittens, they play with their littermates, and in growing up, they learn exactly what the limits of 'roughhousing' are. Some cats don't learn, for whatever reason. And since none of us are about to fight back with our cat, the best way to let them know they've crossed the line is to act like it.

I know cat owners have a tendency to grin and bear it, which is good when it is an accident, but not so good when it's like this.

Also--- lose the water bottle. It's not going to help, if anything, it will make everything worse. Cats do not respond to punishment, at all, ever. If you don't want her to be so affectionate (which... may I ask why on earth you want your cat to be less affectionate?) simply set her down or whatever until she stops. It might take 500 times, but eventually she'll get it.

My sister's cat is the same way with her husband, I'm not sure there is much can be done about it. But, have you considered maybe getting another cat for her to play with? She sounds like she needs TONS of interaction, and another cat could make everyone happier and fulfill that need.
post #4 of 10
Thread Starter 
Thank you for the replies

First we have 3 cats. Another girl and a boy Keeba. Her and Keeba are close and sometimes sleep together and play together often. She loves us all but nothing compares to my husband by far apparently lol.

She wasn't a feral or anything. We got her from a cat rescue. She was alittle under a year when we got her. Lots and lots of kitties and dogs and people at the rescuse, it was out of a womans home. And she was given to the rescue from like the moment she was old enough to be weened I do believe.

She is almost 3 years old now. It has always been a problem but has just been getting worst.

Making sure she knows we are hurt was suggested to me before over this. We both and most definitly me let her know it hurts the moment she does it. She rarely lays on me because I just won't let her because of her claws. I am a huge baby about pain lol Though her and I have issues with my feet. She will lay in front of me and just lay her paw on my foot and do the claw thing too.

When she does it I yell out ouch no. Very dramatic and such everytime even when. My husband isn't quite as dramatic lol but he does let her know it hurts in a big enough way that I think it would be enough. Even more so the times when she has hurt him badly doing it. And he always puts her on the floor after she starts doing it.

I mentioned she is stubburn lol I have had cats my entire life and none were like her. She just doesn't respond well to like no and such. Which might be why she doesn't respond to us being hurt? She just doesn't seem to understand or get it.

Like my other cat Keeba sometimes plays alittle rough and if he hurts me he does react to me being hurt and stops. Usually loves me up too lol

And no we don't want her to stop being affectionate at all She can be a bit needy towards my husband but he adores her and wanted a lap cat for sure It just is hard to have a snuggle kitty when she hurts you everytime
post #5 of 10
Just a thought - if the training doesn't seem to be working, and you and your husband can't deal with the clawing anymore you can try Soft Claws.

I don't think she's meaning to hurt you at all, or not understanding. Some kitties are just a little rougher than others.

In the meantime, how often are you trimming her claws? It would really help keep them duller if you check and trim at least once a week.

My Sho likes to poke my husband when he's sitting at his computer. While he's not meaning to hurt anyone, occasionally if I've missed a trim, Sho will accidentally poke a claw into DH's arm.
post #6 of 10
Thread Starter 
I haven't tried soft claws though I have checked out their website. idk I feel alittle unsure of them. It makes me feel like they might bother the kitty?

We have only tried trimming her claws a few times. It was very difficult to get her to sit still. And I was terribly nervous that we would hurt her.

I guess since nothing else does seem to work I can try trimming them again and maybe try those soft claws.
post #7 of 10
If you do a routine nail clipping (once a week) it will get easier. Or put on those nail caps for protection.

When clipping have one person hold the cat, even wrap in a towel, and the other should cut the nails.
post #8 of 10
Definitely do the nail clipping. We do our kitties about every 10 days. In fact Bijou got his dew claw caught on my hubbies speaker cabinet last night and we had a heck of a time getting it unstuck. I immediately clipped his nails and he held very still - I think he was smart enough to realize I was trying to help him.

The best time to try to clip a lot of nervous kitties is while they are sleeping or not yet fully awake. It may take a couple days to get all the claws, but keep the clippers handy and do one at a time if need be. You'll be doing both you and the kitty a favour by keeping her nails trimmed.
post #9 of 10
I have a blanket close-by for when my kitties hurt me (they just knead vigourously though) and put it under the area where they are doing it. And it hurts A LOT less on the skin when the nails are trimmed. It's a nightmare trying to cut my cats' nails too - they squirm all over the place and bite (thank goodness they have learned to muffle their bite). It helps to just keep the clippers nearby and cut a few at a time (and stop when they get too unruly) pressure to get all the claws at once!
post #10 of 10
My poor Fred had a birth defect that kept him from being able to retract his claws fully. His claws would not shed and would get thick from layers of claws not shedding. We finally just had to learn to clip his nails no matter how much he hated it, for his own good as well as ours. He never learned to behave while we did it, screamed like we were killing him, but was a much happier cat after we finally got it done. The thick layers would peel away after clipping as well.
We did manage to teach him to "fold paws" or get down. We would put him down, and he would come back and fold his paws. There is a solution for you, you just may have not found it yet.
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