It was 6 yrs ago yesterday...

carwashcats

TCS Member
Thread starter
Super Cat
Joined
Jul 24, 2005
Messages
895
Purraise
1
Location
Texas
I tried to do this before now, while it was still the 28th. I just couldn't
seem to manage it though. It was 6 yrs. ago yesterday, Marvin (my husband) was killed in a car accident, he was 39. What a shame! "Missed" doesn't even begin to describe the depth of emotions! The mind and the heart can sure
work against each other. I do want to say, I'm not writing this for
sympathy, I'm writing this for all of you who are married, long term relationships, etc.
Please appreciate each other every minute of everyday! Someone so important in every way of your life simply doesn't make it home from work one afternoon, can make time stand still for yrs! It can also make you think you can't remember all the time spent with them! Like (our life's together)didn't even happen? Then in the same thought process. you remember evivid detail. word for word, touch to touch....
We dated for 2 yrs, we lived together for 4 yrs., then we married, 13 yrs.! He was great friend,an awesome Dad! Marvin was a better mom than I was.....which I'm a fantastic mom... I would be a tough act to follow!! I just wanted to write something for him today.... I believe
Marvin watches over us ..there has been too many signs of that for it
to be wishful thinking! I just hate that my son will go his entire life without him!
I know I could go the rest of my life without ever having to feel that hurt I felt that day you left us... I was blessed to have you for every minute that we were together...Bless you Bull, I know your up there with Scream, Rags and Doc! This one is for you ....... "No farwell words were spoken
No time to say goodbye
You left without a warning..
And only God knows why
 

jenny82

TCS Member
Top Cat
Joined
Apr 19, 2006
Messages
5,773
Purraise
114
Location
Maryland
I'm so sorry for your loss. Thank you for the very important reminder.
 

angelkitty

TCS Member
Top Cat
Joined
Aug 11, 2006
Messages
1,409
Purraise
1
Location
Indiana
Honey,, I'm sooo sorry for your loss. I have no clue what that would be like, and wouldn't want too.. But I want you to know that you have my thoughts... Lots of hugs...
 

mybabyphx

TCS Member
Top Cat
Joined
Mar 19, 2007
Messages
1,884
Purraise
2
Location
Arizona (PM me if you are from AZ too)
I just wanted you to know that your in my thoughts. I can't seem to process what you went through- what your going through- what your kids are going through... but you are a strong woman for getting through this. I can hear in your words that you love him very much. If you ever need to talk, a shoulder to cry on... I'm just a PM away! And what you wrote to him.. brought a tear to my eye. It was just so sweet!
 

catlover19

TCS Member
Top Cat
Joined
Apr 20, 2006
Messages
6,517
Purraise
172
Location
Ontario, Canada
I'm so sorry for your loss. I lost my dad not even 2 weeks ago and it is going to be hard the rest of my life and my 13 year old sisters life without him. If you need someone to talk to, you can pm me.
 

momofmany

TCS Member
Veteran
Joined
Jul 15, 2003
Messages
16,249
Purraise
70
Location
There's no place like home
My husband lost his brother in a car accident 17 years ago tonight (in Texas). He left his wife, a 14 month old and another on the way. I became very close to his widow during her pregnancy and was with her when she delivered their son. I can never totally feel the pain you have gone through and are continuing to go through, but I was close enough to her to sense the pain. It is something you can never describe because it is raw emotion.

My huband was very close to his brother and also talks about how Eddie is still out and about watching over all of us. I am glad you you can still sense Marvin in your life and I hope through you that your son can sense him also.

I didn't know Eddie long, but he did teach all of us who experienced his loss one life long lesson. Life is too short and you never know when your time is up. As painful as it is for you to bring this up, thank you for the reminder. It is easy to become complacent over time.

I am so very sorry for your loss to you and your children. I hope with time it gets easier for you.
 

calico2222

TCS Member
Top Cat
Joined
Dec 9, 2004
Messages
7,731
Purraise
41
Location
Over the river and through the woods...
I am so sorry for your loss. I've only been married 2 years, but sometimes I actually panic sometimes thinking about if something happened to my husband. I saw what my mom went through when she lost my dad, and what MIL went through he FIL died from a sudden heart attack. I can't even imagine being able to go on.

You are such a strong woman. I know, you didn't have a choice. But, to be able to talk about it, and to remind us how fragile life is...I admire you.

My prayers are with you and your kids.
 

luvmy2cats

TCS Member
Top Cat
Joined
Jul 22, 2007
Messages
4,616
Purraise
11
Location
Goshen, IN
I'm sorry for what happened to your family. Thanks for the reminder to cherish the ones we love.
 

tara g

TCS Member
Top Cat
Joined
Jul 16, 2007
Messages
5,678
Purraise
96
Location
On the farm
So very sorry to hear of your loss


I cannot imagine what it would be like to go through that, and it scares me to even THINK about it.
 

missourigrl

TCS Member
Adult Cat
Joined
Aug 19, 2007
Messages
276
Purraise
10
Location
MO
So sorry for your loss. It was kind of you to remember your husband and remind us to cherish those close to our hearts. I admire your strength.
 

anakat

TCS Member
Top Cat
Joined
Oct 20, 2005
Messages
4,237
Purraise
2
Thank you for posting that, it is good to remind us not to take people for granted and to appreciate every day.
 

rosiemac

TCS Member
Veteran
Joined
Dec 3, 2003
Messages
54,358
Purraise
100
Location
ENGLAND... LAND OF HOPE AND GLORY!
Monique, your certainly in my thoughts right now


I lost my 35 year old nephew to a car accident just last year and it still doesn't seem real?.

It just shows how precious life is and how quickly it can be taken from us, and as a reminder that lifes too short to argue and fall out over petty little things
 

ashleigh

TCS Member
Alpha Cat
Joined
Dec 9, 2004
Messages
364
Purraise
1
Location
Peterborough UK
I am so sorry for your loss, I think writing something for him and especially sharing it with us was a beautiful thing to do.
Thank you for your words to us, sometimes we go through daily life in our set ways and tend to forget about the people we cherish, so for you to write this and remind us all of what we take for granted certainly makes us stop and think.

I do believe those we lost are still with us in every sense and still watch over us and I do think it is some source of comfort, sending lots of love and hugs to you and your family.
 
  • Thread Starter Thread Starter
  • #15

carwashcats

TCS Member
Thread starter
Super Cat
Joined
Jul 24, 2005
Messages
895
Purraise
1
Location
Texas
I have to say thanks! everyone here is always so supportive, things are
so much better now than they were....omg! there were days....anyway
I wrote this for the reason for you all to think about me... maybe when you say harsh words or do painful things to the one you hold dear! Because if
you'll stop and think of me or just think of what happen in my life, maybe you
won't say or do those things, instead just love them! Just like susan said, life
is to short!! AMEN! I don't know how strong I am and so many others have had worse to happen to them, but if what I have written, stops any of you who have read this from saying or doing something or whatever the circumstance...then I am truly happy! God doesn't just need old people in
heaven! Just love them, and have a wonderful life together! if I can I'm trying to post his picture....
http://s8.photobucket.com/albums/a22...t=scan0001.jpg
I was trying to figure out the size and I got it to small, duh! try this one
 
  • Thread Starter Thread Starter
  • #16

carwashcats

TCS Member
Thread starter
Super Cat
Joined
Jul 24, 2005
Messages
895
Purraise
1
Location
Texas
Originally Posted by carwashcats

I have to say thanks! everyone here is always so supportive, things are
so much better now than they were....omg! there were days....anyway
I wrote this for the reason for you all to think about me... maybe when you say harsh words or do painful things to the one you hold dear! Because if
you'll stop and think of me or just think of what happen in my life, maybe you
won't say or do those things, instead just love them! Just like susan said, life
is to short!! AMEN! I don't know how strong I am and so many others have had worse to happen to them, but if what I have written, stops any of you who have read this from saying or doing something or whatever the circumstance...then I am truly happy! God doesn't just need old people in
heaven! Just love them, and have a wonderful life together! if I can I'm trying to post his picture....
http://s8.photobucket.com/albums/a22...t=scan0001.jpg
I was trying to figure out the size and I got it to small, duh! try this one
i DID IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I DID IT! I DID IT! YEAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
:
See I told ya'll he was with me....I have not ever learned how to post a picture! Until now, and it was on this thread about him....he was just wanting everyone to see how cute is was!!!
I have literally taught myself the computer, (over the past 6 yrs)
not understanding the lingo and really any of it, it has been a challenge!
But I finally figured it out!!! Thanks, Bull (Marvin) it was you!!!!!! Well it's on now!!! Susan check it out!!!!!! I am so happy!!!!!!!!! Wasn't Marvin handsome, ya'll? Well that made my down week go straight UP!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm lovin life~~~pat myself on the back!!!
Monique
 
  • Thread Starter Thread Starter
  • #17

carwashcats

TCS Member
Thread starter
Super Cat
Joined
Jul 24, 2005
Messages
895
Purraise
1
Location
Texas
Originally Posted by Rosiemac

Monique, your certainly in my thoughts right now


I lost my 35 year old nephew to a car accident just last year and it still doesn't seem real?.

It just shows how precious life is and how quickly it can be taken from us, and as a reminder that lifes too short to argue and fall out over petty little things
Susan, so sorry about your nephew, damn cars! I know exactly what you mean about doesn't seem real! I think that is a defensive mechancism, for your heart, it only let's a little of reality in at a time, so we can learn to deal with such tradeintervals. Now I'm changing the subjecfI just finished posting a response to all''. girl I finally learned how to post a picture....YEAH GOOD GREAT! i'M SO PROUD!!PAT ME ON THE BACK HAPPY! THAT WAS SO LIBERATING!!! I KNEW YOU WOULD THINK HOW FUNNY THIS IS EVERYONE ELSE PROBABLY IS THINKING , "IS she that far behind?" (On the computer) anyway, just
needed a lift to lighten the heavy heart.
Anyway love ya!
Monique
 

rosiemac

TCS Member
Veteran
Joined
Dec 3, 2003
Messages
54,358
Purraise
100
Location
ENGLAND... LAND OF HOPE AND GLORY!
Awwwww Monique he's gorgeous as well!


Nice one Marvin for helping your loving wife with the pictures


He'll be looking down on you Monique, there's no doubts there, and he'll be the first one to meet you at the other side of the bridge when the time is right


I know what you mean about getting excited about posting pics, i was exactly the same
 
  • Thread Starter Thread Starter
  • #19

carwashcats

TCS Member
Thread starter
Super Cat
Joined
Jul 24, 2005
Messages
895
Purraise
1
Location
Texas
Originally Posted by mybabyphx

I just wanted you to know that your in my thoughts. I can't seem to process what you went through- what your going through- what your kids are going through... but you are a strong woman for getting through this. I can hear in your words that you love him very much. If you ever need to talk, a shoulder to cry on... I'm just a PM away! And what you wrote to him.. brought a tear to my eye. It was just so sweet!
Thanks for being a friend Tiffany, and the PM offer! Right back at ya! Hopefully I would PM you and we could be
cause we all have
drama in our lives. we all have to deal! I don't like being grown up!
do u? thanks for your kind thoughts and words!! Your a doll!
Monique
 
  • Thread Starter Thread Starter
  • #20

carwashcats

TCS Member
Thread starter
Super Cat
Joined
Jul 24, 2005
Messages
895
Purraise
1
Location
Texas
Originally Posted by catlover19

I'm so sorry for your loss. I lost my dad not even 2 weeks ago and it is going to be hard the rest of my life and my 13 year old sisters life without him. If you need someone to talk to, you can pm me.
I am soo sorry for your loss....
If YOU need someone to talk to, please PM me! I really mean that! I am
not a dr. but I'm a hairdresser, ha ha we counsel people daily! I have
been through my son's grief as well as my own, we were always on different
pages during thoses 1st few yrs. You sound like your in shock still, what I mean is you are holding it together, that is how I was, I kept on working
no time off, at the funeral I thought to myself, 'you might want to cry, Monique, or everyone will think something is wrong with you' I cried, but it was surface crying, I kept thinking , well I'm handling this better than I thought I ever would......until uh. 4 mos. later, I got up and looked out my
kitchen window, and ..your never going to see him again ( here on earth) well I already knew that but for some reason it finally hit me like a ton of bricks, and I started crying,I cried for the next 4 mos; so please,anytime anyplace, you need me just get ahold of me
lots of love!
Monique
 
Top