How to break up with a boyfriend?

alleygirl · Aug 22, 2007

Originally Posted by mybabyphx

Water bill: my name

Electricity bill: my name

Cell phone bill: my name- it's our only phone in the house

Those are in your name, you can cancel them. As for the apartment, when I worked for a rental office, we would take a name off the lease ONLY if everyone involved signed a paper stating such. If your bf and roommate aren't willing to do that, then you will have to continue paying rent legally. Make sure you give proper notice also, if your lease automatically renews each year.

You also might talk to them about transferring to a cheaper apt if they have others available. Can phx stay in your bedroom at your dad's?

littleraven7726 · Aug 22, 2007

Originally Posted by mybabyphx

Will the company's let me just call them up and switch names? Or how do you go abouts doing that?

I feel bad because they don't know ANYONE in AZ... they moved out here because of me. Now I'm leaving them stranded, you know?

Some you can call up. Others you need to go to the main office.

It's easy though.

trixie23 · Aug 22, 2007

Originally Posted by mybabyphx

We have a cool landlord, I know he'll let me get off...

I haven't talked to him yet though...

Dont be so sure, he still needs cash for the place and your roomies are not a reliable source of income. Your landlord may be cool but he also needs to cover his arse, he isnt going to take a cut in income from renting his properties. He will want to have proof that they qualify financially to pay their rent (unless they get a roomie or sub-lease the place) No landlord is that nice. He may work with you in coming to a solution but I doubt that he will just take you off the lease. Also your roomies will have to agree to you leaving the lease (signing a new lease to just their names) are you positive they will do this for you?

Call your bill companies, tell them that you plan to move and want the bills takin out of your name. Go from there, they will guide you in the right direction

mybabyphx · Aug 22, 2007

The landlord that we have- when we moved in he didn't even make us prove that we had jobs or anything... so he doesn't know I'm the only one paying the bills, etc. He's really nice and easy going I'm about 95% sure he'll take my name off. Plus my bf and roommate will definetly get another roomate. Since it is a 3 bedroom house! I would ask the landlord if I could transfer to a different place, but this is the only place he has for rent.

trixie23 · Aug 22, 2007

Originally Posted by mybabyphx

The landlord that we have- when we moved in he didn't even make us prove that we had jobs or anything... so he doesn't know I'm the only one paying the bills, etc. He's really nice and easy going I'm about 95% sure he'll take my name off. Plus my bf and roommate will definetly get another roomate. Since it is a 3 bedroom house! I would ask the landlord if I could transfer to a different place, but this is the only place he has for rent.

But will your bf and roomie both sign an agreement freeing you of the lease? They have to sign in agreement, it isnt up to just the landlord.

mybabyphx · Aug 22, 2007

Originally Posted by trixie23

But will your bf and roomie both sign an agreement freeing you of the lease? They have to sign in agreement, it isnt up to just the landlord.

yes they will sign. they will get a new roommate

trixie23 · Aug 22, 2007

Originally Posted by mybabyphx

yes they will sign. they will get a new roommate

Guess you know what you need to do now

lunasmom · Aug 22, 2007

Originally Posted by mybabyphx

Will the company's let me just call them up and switch names? Or how do you go abouts doing that?

I feel bad because they don't know ANYONE in AZ... they moved out here because of me. Now I'm leaving them stranded, you know?

No they will not let you just switch names. I know around here they ask for SSN for the account holder (which IMO is WRONG!!).

Anyway, if they're in your name, cancel them. Because you are renting, by default things like the water bill/gas, etc will go to the home OWNER, aka your landlord. At that point if the landlord starts to receive bills then he'll come back on whoever is living in the house at the time.

Good luck in talking with your landlord and such. From what you've talked about I think you're doing the right thing.

natalie_ca · Aug 22, 2007

Well, so long as you are living there and spending all of your money on food, rent and utilities, you will never be able to move out from there.

The first thing you have to do is talk to your dad or a good friend or another relative about staying with them for a few months. Then get your name off the lease, cancel the utilities and move.

That's the only way you are going to be able to save some money to move out is by getting out of the situation you are in.

As for being upset that he slept in the spare room, why? You were wanting to move out, you aren't happy there or with him, and it seems that he isn't either because he's losing his meal ticket. When you break up you don't go on happily living together and sleeping in the same room/bed.

If you do have to go live with your dad for a few months, it doesn't sound like a great place for the cat because of the doggy door. If your Dad ends up being your ownly avenue, can you get a friend or relative to look after your cat for a few months for you? I know it will be hard to be away from her, but you could visit her, and it would allow you to get out of the bad situation that you are in, something you otherwise won't be able to do if you have to try and save money while playing sugar momma to 2 lazy guys.

littleraven7726 · Aug 22, 2007

Originally Posted by lunasmom

Anyway, if they're in your name, cancel them. Because you are renting, by default things like the water bill/gas, etc will go to the home OWNER, aka your landlord. At that point if the landlord starts to receive bills then he'll come back on whoever is living in the house at the time.

Good luck in talking with your landlord and such. From what you've talked about I think you're doing the right thing.

If they won't let you change names. Just cancel everything.

The guys will have to put everything in their names that way for sure.

It was 1996 or 1997 that the company I was dealing with allowed changing of names. But my roommate would have had to go in (which she didn't) and change it. Most of the time a phone call to the company will tell you if they do that or not.

karl · Aug 22, 2007

mybabyphx, I would strongly urge you simply to throw rocks at him until he runs away. Throw rocks at his buddy too. You will feel much better.

mybabyphx · Aug 22, 2007

Originally Posted by Karl

mybabyphx, I would strongly urge you simply to throw rocks at him until he runs away. Throw rocks at his buddy too. You will feel much better.

Awww, thanks Karl. I'm so glad someone cares.

icklemiss21 · Aug 22, 2007

I haven't read through all these posts, just the first two pages, so sorry if this has already been said, but

Every situation is different and no matter how much you tell us we don't know all the rules, laws and even the intricacies of your relationship so only YOU can decide how to leave him and even if you are going to leave him.

mybabyphx · Aug 22, 2007

So, here's the scoop:

I'm at work right now, and my boss's are probably going to let me off work a couple hours early... my head will not concentrate on work right now... so I asked if I could leave early....

So, when I get off work.. I'm going to the house and gathering up some clothes for a couple days and going to my dads.

I talked to my dad and I'm going over to his house tonight and going to stay there until I can sort things out in my head. He was very supportive and said I can come over any time I need.

PHX is going to stay at my house for the time being,until I talk to my dad tonight and see what I'm going to do. He'll be fine.

Oh and my dad's bringing me out for Thai food tonight.

littleraven7726 · Aug 22, 2007

I hope everything works out.

mybabyphx · Aug 22, 2007

Thank you everyone for your support.

It really means a lot to me! I'll keep you updated.

greenvillegal · Aug 22, 2007

I had to leave a guy too. I would have advised getting a signed lease so he couldn't try to stop you, but it sounds like he's being immature about it. Just be strong, but try to be civil to him so things don't get nasty. Good luck!

menasmom · Aug 22, 2007

Originally Posted by CarolPetunia

Ahhh... perfection!

And what a good idea, to seek guidance in the words of our greatest songwriters! Umm... howbout this one from Bob Dylan:

"It ain't no use in callin' out my name now
Like you never did before
It ain't no use in callin' out my name now
I can't hear you anymore
I ain't sayin' you treated me unkind
You could've done better, but I don't mind
You just sorta wasted my precious time
Don't think twice, it's all right."

Or if you wait much longer, you might have to go for this one from Stevie Ray Vaughn:

"I'm leavin' you, baby
Before I commit a crime!"

Beautiful, beautiful!!! Nothing like a quote from the true master of lyrics, Bob Dylan!

trixie23 · Aug 22, 2007

Originally Posted by menasmom

Beautiful, beautiful!!! Nothing like a quote from the true master of lyrics, Bob Dylan!

Here is a song for you... I LOVE this song (80's freestyle/soul baby)

Club Nouveau: Why you treat me so bad?????

why you treat me so bad
why you treat me so bad
why you treat me so bad
why you treat me so bad
why you treat me so bad baby

oh girl i loved you but you turned and you walked away
i would love you for tomorrow though i know i do today
told me that you'd never hurt me, girl you just tore my life apart
tell me baby, why'd you do it, won't you bring me back my heart

i tried to understand it baby, i searched my heart inside my mind
i searched the depths of my soul baby
there was nothing there to find
you told me that you'd never leave me
girl you just went and told a lie
tell me baby, why'd you do it, why'd you make ah ma want to cry

why you treat me so bad, i don't know why baby
why you treat me so bad, why you do me the way you do
why you treat me so bad, i don't know why baby
why you treat me so bad
why you treat me so bad baby

boy just let me tell you how i really and truly feel
you know that i have doubts and issues,
but now i'm gonna tell you the deal
you tell me that i always hurt ya, i don't know what ya talkin' 'bout
tried to love you, tried to hold you, but you always seemed to doubt

you have told me that you didn't trust me
and you didn't want me around
show somebody else your interest, now you walk around with a frown
sorry that you say i hurt you, but you know you hurt me too
i'm begging you baby, i need you back, cuz i'm still in love with you

why you treat me so bad, i don't know why baby
why you treat me so bad, why you do me the way you do
why you treat me so bad, i don't know why baby
why you treat me so bad
why you treat me so bad baby

i sit here all alone just thinkin' how our love could be
but everytime i call you up you won't get on the phone with me
i just don't know if i can take it, you make me cop a plea
you got me begging for your lovin', can't you see it's killing me

i just don't understand you baby, after all i've done for you
you know we've both done through some changes
now you say your love is true
boy, you know how much i loved you, now i guess my heart has changed
don't beg me baby, can't take you back, i've found myself another man

why you treat me so bad, i don't know why baby
why you treat me so bad, why you do me the way you do
why you treat me so bad, i don't know why baby
why you treat me so bad
why you treat me so bad baby

oh girl
i don't know
why you treat me so bad
do what's right

why you treat me so bad, i don't know
why you treat me so bad, so bad
why you treat me so bad...

The ultimate break up song (you may have heard the background beat in the luniz song "I got 5 on it"... This song by Club Nouveau is the original beat)...

Here is the vid it is horrendous and hilarious all at once... It is old school but it rocks (girls got a voice)

mybabyphx · Aug 22, 2007

Holy cow that is old school, I watched the video!

Originally Posted by trixie23

Here is a song for you... I LOVE this song (80's freestyle/soul baby)

Club Nouveau: Why you treat me so bad?????

why you treat me so bad
why you treat me so bad
why you treat me so bad
why you treat me so bad
why you treat me so bad baby

oh girl i loved you but you turned and you walked away
i would love you for tomorrow though i know i do today
told me that you'd never hurt me, girl you just tore my life apart
tell me baby, why'd you do it, won't you bring me back my heart

i tried to understand it baby, i searched my heart inside my mind
i searched the depths of my soul baby
there was nothing there to find
you told me that you'd never leave me
girl you just went and told a lie
tell me baby, why'd you do it, why'd you make ah ma want to cry

why you treat me so bad, i don't know why baby
why you treat me so bad, why you do me the way you do
why you treat me so bad, i don't know why baby
why you treat me so bad
why you treat me so bad baby

boy just let me tell you how i really and truly feel
you know that i have doubts and issues,
but now i'm gonna tell you the deal
you tell me that i always hurt ya, i don't know what ya talkin' 'bout
tried to love you, tried to hold you, but you always seemed to doubt

you have told me that you didn't trust me
and you didn't want me around
show somebody else your interest, now you walk around with a frown
sorry that you say i hurt you, but you know you hurt me too
i'm begging you baby, i need you back, cuz i'm still in love with you

why you treat me so bad, i don't know why baby
why you treat me so bad, why you do me the way you do
why you treat me so bad, i don't know why baby
why you treat me so bad
why you treat me so bad baby

i sit here all alone just thinkin' how our love could be
but everytime i call you up you won't get on the phone with me
i just don't know if i can take it, you make me cop a plea
you got me begging for your lovin', can't you see it's killing me

i just don't understand you baby, after all i've done for you
you know we've both done through some changes
now you say your love is true
boy, you know how much i loved you, now i guess my heart has changed
don't beg me baby, can't take you back, i've found myself another man

why you treat me so bad, i don't know why baby
why you treat me so bad, why you do me the way you do
why you treat me so bad, i don't know why baby
why you treat me so bad
why you treat me so bad baby

oh girl
i don't know
why you treat me so bad
do what's right

why you treat me so bad, i don't know
why you treat me so bad, so bad
why you treat me so bad...

The ultimate break up song (you may have heard the background beat in the luniz song "I got 5 on it"... This song by Club Nouveau is the original beat)...

Here is the vid it is horrendous and hilarious all at once... It is old school but it rocks (girls got a voice)

How to break up with a boyfriend?

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