my resume needs to be purrfect. need advise, pls!

catgirl2548m

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since every1 here has been soooo nice, i thought i would take a chance and ask for help making my resume look gooood. its a little scarey posting it here b/c im not exactly overflowing with experience, lol.

my dad works for the phone company so he tipped me off to a couple of telemarking openings they might have and i hope i can get an interview this week. as you can imagine, it took me a while to get all my spelling mistakes right, i normally dont pay too mcuh attention to that, lol, but every1 always says your resume has to be perfct.

so, here it is. i hoope you dont mind but i blocked out my personal stuff but the rest is all ther.

should i change anything? ive got way more jobs i could add before 2005 but there not nearly as important as these. these were just the best ones and the ones i had the longest, lol. should i add everything else 2?

thx in advance for ur help u guys!!!!! pls go easy on me.
 

karl

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Telemarketing, huh? I always love it when a telemarketer calls and asks if they can speak to me by name. I reply, "Naw, he's back in jail again, and he still owes me money!"
 
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catgirl2548m

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Originally Posted by Karl

Telemarketing, huh? I always love it when a telemarketer calls and asks if they can speak to me by name. I reply, "Naw, he's back in jail again, and he still owes me money!"
lol, yeah. i just want to be able to bug you during diner, lol. but im a talker. i love to talk. so i think i can do the job. i alwasy try to find jobs that need more talking than writing, lol.
 

gingersmom

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First of all, right off the bat, get that "Unemployed" segment right the heck off that resume! Employers don't want to see that you were unemployed; the resume is work experience, not looking-for-work experience.

Also, take "Hobbies" off the resume as well. Employers, again, don't care about your spare time, they care about the time you would spend in the office.

I would also caution against putting "Babysitter" down as work experience, unless it directly relates to a potential telemarketing position.

Under both temp positions, you need to detail a bit about what your duties and responsibilities were. If they involved any type of cold-calling or telephone relationships, then you want to be sure that is included.

I know that it is tough to build experience without having experience, but you want your resume to look as strong as possible.

Good luck to you with your interviews!
 

heavenangels

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I total agree with Gingersmom I just skimmed your resume right away I noticed in your "objective" you say to win business for you . I have never worked as a telemarketer however the word WIN just doesn't sound right. Maybe this is a word used in this field ( still don't like it ) I would use customer service in it's place or something like that .
I would also move your Education to the button of the page and at least add the state of the school's.
Please don't put your hobbies on your Resume most employer's really doesn't need to see them.
I won't repeat the rest as I said Gingersmom has all ready pointed them out .
I'm glad that you shared your resume with us and please don't take what I have said as criticism. The last thing you want is a employer not interested in your resume.........
Good Luck
 

gingersmom

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It IS criticism, but it is constructive - we just want you to be the best you can be, on paper.


Please let us know how things go!
 

mybabyphx

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Originally Posted by GingersMom

I would also caution against putting "Babysitter" down as work experience, unless it directly relates to a potential telemarketing position.
Could she write 'Nanny'?

It shows that she is reliable, can keep a job, and must be a good person to be working with kids.
Maybe I'm partial because I used to be a nanny, but I think she should actually keep it on there. Even though it isn't relevant experience, it's still experience and time put in the work force!
 

lemur 6

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Many people do the objective differently, but the way I do it is to be extremely clear on what YOU want for a job. Take the employer out of it. For example a good objective for a telemarketing position would be "An entry level telemarketing position in nationally recognized firm seeking individuals with good leadership and organizational skills.". That way the employer knows what you want.

Either within the education section, or in a section of its own, you should list some skills you have. For example, computer skills (specific, like MS word, excel, etc), foreign languages, any certifications you might have, any classes you took that might be applicable to the job (i.e. accounting, business management, etc), and so on. A skills section is one of the most important parts of the resume because it allows the employer to just read just one section and know immediately what you are capable of.
 

rubsluts'mommy

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Also in the Objectives: you put 'to get a job as'

I may be nitpicky here... but I was an English major, and I'm a writer, so I pick.

I'd reword that bit... for example: 'To work as' or 'to find employment in the field of telemarketing' you get the idea.

The reason is simple: employers, no matter the industry (with the exception of temp agencies), want people who think 'career' not 'job.' Job is temporary... you're not in it for the long haul. Saying 'Career' (whether you plan on it or not) gives them the impression you will stay longer than a few months. So, don't say 'job.'

A.
 
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catgirl2548m

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wow, thx every1 -- these ideas are really helpful!!!!

pls dont feel bad that ur criticising my resume -- thats why i put it up here --so dont hold back. the harder on me u all r the better it will be when a real employr looks at it. so give me ur best shots!!!!

i will defintely take out 'unemployed'. i put that in there b/c some1 else told me you shouldnt have any gaps in your job histry, but what you said makes sense.

and NANNY! why didnt i think of that?
or maybe even i shoudl say ohpear?


all the other ideas were great 2. i reallly, really apprecate the grammer and stuff because im not very good at that as im sure you can all tell, lol. so keep on me. and, yeah, lemur ill put some of the job skills in the next version.

anything else every1? remember, show no mercy!!!! i want to get better.
 

lunasmom

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Originally Posted by catgirl2548m

i will defintely take out 'unemployed'. i put that in there b/c some1 else told me you shouldnt have any gaps in your job histry, but what you said makes sense.
You can have gaps in your resume, but be prepared to explain them.

For the education portion. I take it that you made it through 3 years of high school then dropped out only to receive your degree in 2005? Please correct me if I'm wrong!

Anyhoo, if you didn't graduate from the high school, I wouldn't like it. Instead put the school where you earned your GED from. If you simply received a high school diploma then definitely put something like:

Name of High School
City, State June 2005.

This says that you graduated from this school in June 2005.

With your Community College, still list it, BUT change "1 semester" to:

Expected graduation date: June 2010

Or whenever you hope to receive your degree.
 

salemwitchchild

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Originally Posted by mybabyphx

Could she write 'Nanny'?

It shows that she is reliable, can keep a job, and must be a good person to be working with kids.
Maybe I'm partial because I used to be a nanny, but I think she should actually keep it on there. Even though it isn't relevant experience, it's still experience and time put in the work force!
I agree. Any experience shows that you are reliable.
I also recommend you take off the objective line completely. The reason being is that you can add this in your cover letter (actually it's what it's for as well as highlight your credentials).
 
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catgirl2548m

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Originally Posted by SalemWitchChild

I agree. Any experience shows that you are reliable.
I also recommend you take off the objective line completely. The reason being is that you can add this in your cover letter (actually it's what it's for as well as highlight your credentials).
oh geez!!!!!! a cover letter


i completely forgot that!!! ugh. it takes me so long to write somthing well. is a cover lettr requred if you are bringing the resume in person?

also thx 4 the tip about au pair. oops.
 

silentnate

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I would suggest that you need to put hobbies that make you look more sociable- golf, cats and blogging make you look like a loner. It is also important that you stop posting in short-hand and start structuring your sentences as any employer is going to be looking for someone with good literacy skills.

'ohpear'- sheesh
 
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catgirl2548m

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Originally Posted by lunasmom

For the education portion. I take it that you made it through 3 years of high school then dropped out only to receive your degree in 2005? Please correct me if I'm wrong!

Anyhoo, if you didn't graduate from the high school, I wouldn't like it. Instead put the school where you earned your GED from. If you simply received a high school diploma then definitely put something like:

Name of High School
City, State June 2005.

This says that you graduated from this school in June 2005.

With your Community College, still list it, BUT change "1 semester" to:

Expected graduation date: June 2010

Or whenever you hope to receive your degree.
thx!!!

ok, yes ur right that i dropped out and the got my ged in 2005. im not sure what to put for expected graduatin from novacoco, tho. i took my 1 semester in 2005 after i got my ged but havent been back. maybe i will, but at that pace, i would have to say expect degree in 2019, lol!
 
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catgirl2548m

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Originally Posted by silentNate

I would suggest that you need to put hobbies that make you look more sociable- golf, cats and blogging make you look like a loner. It is also important that you stop posting in short-hand and start structuring your sentences as any employer is going to be looking for someone with good literacy skills.

'ohpear'- sheesh

nate nate nate!! ur at dharma hq? ru a writer for lost?!?!? thats like my favite show ever. sometimes i have troubel understadn the plot but its so cool with the smoke monster and stuff. plus, jack is hawt. well, swayer is a hottie, 2. i love it!!!



im taking my hobbies off the resume anyway, but why do those hobbies make me seem like a loner???

golf -- u play together as a 4some, right? i mean i mostly just watch tv golf when
tiger woods
is playing, but i thogut busness peopel played golf togteher a lot???

blogging -- tcs is the friendlyest place!!!! how can blogging be a loner? ive made so many friends.

cats --
dont get met started about that crap that cat lovers are all misfits. i h8 h8 to hear stuff like that. and on THIS website? omg. pls take it back.
 

lunasmom

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Originally Posted by catgirl2548m

oh geez!!!!!! a cover letter


i completely forgot that!!! ugh. it takes me so long to write somthing well. is a cover lettr requred if you are bringing the resume in person?

also thx 4 the tip about au pair. oops.
The thing with cover letters: If you steer your objective well enough you can actually avoid creating a cover letter. The only other times you don't need a cover letter is if you're going to the interview without handing in a resume, or a friend is submitting a resume for you (then they basically act as a the cover letter and reference for you).

Originally Posted by catgirl2548m

thx!!!

ok, yes ur right that i dropped out and the got my ged in 2005. im not sure what to put for expected graduatin from novacoco, tho. i took my 1 semester in 2005 after i got my ged but havent been back. maybe i will, but at that pace, i would have to say expect degree in 2019, lol!
I personally would leave it off then. Actually what you can do, if the class was something that pertained to the job (i.e. Speech class or a marketing class) list the specific class with a description and the Term & Year you took the class.

Otherwise if it was a history class for example, I would leave the college part off. Unless you're consistently taking classes, they may view that as a negative rather than a positive (even though outside things could have happened like money issues and such that would have caused you not to go back
)

Just a thought.
 
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