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Do you think this is right? (sad need to vent)

post #1 of 27
Thread Starter 
Ok our rescue is having a tough time deciding the fate of this one cat in our rescue. Shes a very cute declawed female. Which would normally make her very adoptable.

But she isnt. She wont let anyone touch her without yowling and if she wasnt declawed we couldnt touch her. She acts like a feral but isnt. She came into the rescue being a perfectly normal cat. She came in with her brother also declawed. Someone wanted just him so we adopted him out. She turned into a demon.

We are a no-kill rescue and unless they have major life threatening health issues weve never put an animal down. But sunday I found out that they might put Princess to sleep sometime this week. Shes just gotten worse and worse. She attacks all the other cats. So they seperated her. Kept her in her own room. Now she is attacking her fostermom and bit her very badly saturday.

I think we are all wondering if we did the right thing by splitting the two of them up. Hes doing fine in his new home. But she just broke down afterwards. We just arent sure if we can bring ourselves to put her down. Shes perfectly happy when left in the room all by herself. But is that really a life for her?

I just need some opinions. Someone to tell me its ok. Thats shes not living a good life. Shes really breaking all of our hearts.
post #2 of 27
Can you contact the peopel who adopted her brother and see if they would take her too?

It seems to me that she needs him. I don't know what to say. Thats a tough spot to be in. What if you trried to introduce her to a new kitty and see what happens. Maybe she just needs a kitty friend.

Sending prayers and vibes that you are able to do whats best.
post #3 of 27
This may be a long shot... but have you tried calling the family that adopted her brother and asked if they might be interested in taking her because of this?

I ask only because when I went to adopt Peewee he had a brother - looked just like him, but everywhere peewee is grey his brother was black. I only adopted him because at the time I thought I was still getting my NY boys back from my mother. Because of illness, the NY boys stayed in NY and I was so upset that I didn't adopt his brother too. Went back to the shelter to get him, but he was already gone.

So just based on that I was thinking maybe you could call the family and explain how heartbroken his sister is without him... maybe they will consider her now that theyve had him? If someone had called me about peewees brother after I adopted Peewee and found out I wasn't getting my other boys back, I would have adopted him in a second.
post #4 of 27
Thread Starter 
We already called them. They live in a city that has a limit of 4 cats per household and her brother made the fourth. We already tried that when she first started acting up.

She doesnt get along with any of the other cats in the foster home any more. She hurt one pretty bad by biting him all over his belly.
post #5 of 27
I agree with the others, because this is a very similar situation to Hera and Reyah (mother and daughter). At first, we only took Reyah. My friend, Angie, was fostering the girls and when we didn't take Hera, she took her back to the shelter (that she was fostering for) due to family coming in town. Hera went ballistic. The shelter described her behavior almost identical to the way you described this girl. After a few days of her continuously getting worse, they wanted to euthanize her. Angie contacted us to see if we knew anyone that would take her or if we would. We didn't see any reason for a sweet loving cat to get euthanized due to being scared, so we let Angie bring her to us. Hera hid a lot, but after about 3-4wks, she came out of her shell and is even more loving than Reyah. She's happy here and I do not regret making the decision to bring her here at all. I would definitely talk to the adopters and explain how she's been after losing her brother. They may not agree, but they might. It's at least worth a shot. Good luck!!!
post #6 of 27
Sorry I dont have any advice, everyone here as given you some good already. I just wanna send out some GOOD that Princess calms down and she eventually gets adopted.
post #7 of 27
If she's attacking other cats and her foster mum, and isn't adoptable, then the best thing for her may be to be euthanised. If you can't find another kind soul willing to take her on while understanding she may not be very sociable, then you're prettymuch out of choices.

Even with her brother, she might not be happy again. I volunteer at a "no kill" shelter that only euthanises when a kitty is either very sick or gets aggressive - once they start biting and scratching staff/volunteers and do it more than once, and they don't seem adoptable, then that's it for them. Unfortunately they can't all be saved
post #8 of 27
Just a thought, but has she been vetted since this behavior started? there may be an underlying medical issue that's causing her to act this way; cats are sooooo good at hiding their illness.

Another random thought -- maybe a different foster home would improve her attitude?

Sending my own vibes and prayers that a solution can be found for Princess.
post #9 of 27
How incredibly sad; the poor girl must be miserable without her brother.
How long has it been since he was adopted? Is he still in the same town? How old are they? I'm just wondering if his new family would consider letting him come to visit her to see how she'd react? If she's not aggressive with him, maybe the family could be talked into a different cat so that Princess and her brother could be adopted together? I realize the family is probably attached to him, but if it meant Princess wouldn't be euthanized maybe they would consider it. I do hope you can come up with a solution; this just breaks my heart. Poor Princess must feel so terribly alone.
post #10 of 27
A vet is what I was thinking. She's probably terrified and unsure about everything now and since her world has changed it's been hard for her.
Poor thing. I wish I could help you. I hate seeing animals like that. Isis is sort of like that but doesn't bite, just yeowls, hisses and smacks when other cats get to close to her.
I think your kitty is antisocial and needs another animal she can relate with. It takes time to find that one though. Changing her "partners" to frequently can result in her rejecting most if not all of the cats you put in with her.
Have you tried a kitten? Maybe she'd take to a kitten. If she's happy in her own little room then let her be there and do her thing if you have the space. My heart goes out to your little girl. I wish again I could help you but I'm over my animal limit and can only offer what little knowledge I have thanks to Isis my little anitsocial girl.
post #11 of 27
This may be a lonshot, but how about, if you DO take her to the vet's, have him give her a tranquilizer so that when you bring her back home you can have her sedated just enough to pet her and let her know you're not going to hurt her? I mean, REALLY spend time with her, talking in a soothing tone. Does that make sense? I feel like if maybe she can somehow see that she's not going to be hurt, she might come around.
????
post #12 of 27
Oh that's so sad.

I'm so sorry for you having to see this. Poor girl is just traumatized.
post #13 of 27
Have you guys tried fostering her out to anyone? It sounds to me like she's gone crazy from being in the shelter. It's not an idea place for cats to relax or show their true nature.

if she were to be taken in by someone for a few weeks even, maybe that would change her attitude?
post #14 of 27
Quote:
Originally Posted by ThePatches View Post
if she were to be taken in by someone for a few weeks even, maybe that would change her attitude?
I was also thinking of this, but with the restriction that she is an only cat in the home. I absolutely understand that there is probably no one at the shelter who is in a situation to do this, but perhaps the relative of one of your volunteers who is cat friendly and currently catless?
post #15 of 27
Thread Starter 
Thanks for the advice everyone. I'll pass some of it on to the rescue.

Just to clarify a few things.

Princess is in her 4th foster home since her brother was adopted almost 8 months ago. So she isnt and has never been in a shelter.

She kept attacking her other foster parents. The foster home she is currently in has been walking around in a parka, thick gloves and boots any time she goes into Princess room now because she cant trust her not to attack her.

Shes currently living in the spare bedroom all by herself with tons of toys and things. She spends all her time under the bed.

Shes 6 years old. Ceasar (her brother) and her were together their whole life but didnt seem to be to close so we didnt have reservations on adopting them out seperatly. They seemed to only tolerate each other.

The behavior started immediately after he left.

Shes been to the vets several times and they can find nothing physically wrong with her. Blood panels came back normal. Shes perfectly healthy.

Shes not my foster or my cat. I think some people thought she was. Shes being fostered by another lady. Who only fosters 2 cats at a time and only has 1 cat of her own. The cat Princess injured was the ladies 18 year old cat.

Im really stressing out over this we all are since weve only had to put down 5 cats in the rescue and all for health reasons. My foster kitten Black Jack (hydrocephylis), a kitten that was attack by some dogs, a cat with severe liver failure, a cat that had been hit by a car and a kitten that had been burned. So its really a tough think to do. Because she is healthy and we want to give her every chance possible.
post #16 of 27
Being the cold heartbless bawling lady....I say that under the circumstances, she might need to be euthanized. Get her vet checked first, though.
post #17 of 27
This is tough. Even if the ones that adopted the brother would be willing to bring him in to see her again; it may not be wise. He's been gone for awhile and he will smell just as "different" - she will not recognize him as brother anymore and may attack.

Cats are not like dogs - takes a lot longer to socialize siblings if they've not seen each other for more then a few weeks apart. Kinda like the reactions of a cat being at the vet for more then a few days and coming home - the resident cats think of them as "stranger".

And it sounds like you've tried to isolate her with no good results, so its not a matter of being with other cats or not. Not good when you need heavy gloves and the cat is attacking people.

Unfortunately it would be very hard to find a person willing to work one-on-one with her at this point. Maybe the cat does need to be put down. What would be the decision to put down or not if the cat was a very aggressive dog who was exhibiting those behaviors?
post #18 of 27
Man, this was so totally a question for the cat behaviorist, Kerry. Um, I think I'd see about potentially drugging her for a short term, let her calm down some, perhaps someone can actually spend time with her that's making progress.. and she might even take to another kitty?

If the choices are drugs or euthanasia, I'm thinking drugs are a way to start. If it's an issue of cost, let me know and maybe I can help offset the cost of the drugs for her a little.
post #19 of 27
I can't offer any advise other then what has already been offered. i'll just keep her in my prayers and send vibes her way!
post #20 of 27
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by CatsAreBetter View Post
Man, this was so totally a question for the cat behaviorist, Kerry. Um, I think I'd see about potentially drugging her for a short term, let her calm down some, perhaps someone can actually spend time with her that's making progress.. and she might even take to another kitty?

If the choices are drugs or euthanasia, I'm thinking drugs are a way to start. If it's an issue of cost, let me know and maybe I can help offset the cost of the drugs for her a little.
Thanks. Im not sure if weve tried that yet. But I'll definatly ask them if we could try that. Does anyone know what the waiting time to figure out how long it will take to take affect if it is going to work?
post #21 of 27
I'm not sure.. I know that the advice I've been given suggests keeping them on it temporarily for several months.. three or four.. long enough for the cat to forget the behavior, basically. I'm not sure what she would need, though.
post #22 of 27
Hope I'm not too late..

This is exactly the situation that our shelter encounted with Peanut and Sassy, luckily I had room for them both. Peanut became downright anti-social the instant the she or Sassy were taken out of the cage. I discovered somewhat accidentally that if I were to lift out both of them at once, all was well, in fact, Peanut would give me little licky kisses while I was carrying her around.

Long story short, Peanut is deaf. Even thought the two are not related, they had been together since being several weeks old, and Sassy was her ears. I strongly recommend a really thorough checkup, it's quite possible that she and her brother were in some sort of symbiotic relationship due to a disability.
post #23 of 27
if she is behaving visciously towards staff members and other animals- the most irresponsible thing you guys could do would be to adopt her out to family KNOWING her behavior is what it has become.

I would give her a few days and just see if she calms down any (seperated from everyone else of course). If no improvements have been made, i hate to say it- but having her pts might be the most humane option. She is not adoptable behaving that way- and if ya'll were to adopt her out and she were to badly injure someone- ya'll could be liable. What if she bit a small child badly? That would be really bad. I am soo sorry ya'll are faced with this decision. The way you've described her temperment at this point makes her sound like she is not adoptable. BUT i am sending vibes that she'll come around ((vibes))

If not though, i hope ya'll are able to make the right decision about what is in the kitty's best interest. She sounds like she's just miserable right now and is scared of everyone and everything...that is no way to life.

In a little side note, she may have anxiety attacks that might be causing these issues. If your shelter is able to- ya'll might want to try giving her Prozac before considering euthanazia. I've know quite a few animals to have a great deal of success with it that were in similar situations. It's worth a shot
post #24 of 27
Awww, the poor baby I have no advice..just sending for her.
post #25 of 27
Quote:
Originally Posted by CatsAreBetter View Post
Man, this was so totally a question for the cat behaviorist, Kerry. Um, I think I'd see about potentially drugging her for a short term, let her calm down some, perhaps someone can actually spend time with her that's making progress.. and she might even take to another kitty?

If the choices are drugs or euthanasia, I'm thinking drugs are a way to start. If it's an issue of cost, let me know and maybe I can help offset the cost of the drugs for her a little.
That's what I said when I posted yesterday--take her to the vet and have him give her something to sedate her, then spend a few hours petting her and talking calmly to her to gain her trust. I'm hoping she'd remember the kindness and gentleness that was shown to her once she "wakes" from the sedation...
post #26 of 27
Quote:
Originally Posted by menasmom View Post
That's what I said when I posted yesterday--take her to the vet and have him give her something to sedate her, then spend a few hours petting her and talking calmly to her to gain her trust. I'm hoping she'd remember the kindness and gentleness that was shown to her once she "wakes" from the sedation...
I had a feral cat Tigger who was sedated at the vet when they had to draw blood. Even though he was bonded to me, he actually freaked out as the sedation wore off and tried to bite me. It made him worse rather than calm.

If you try drugs, try anti-depressants, not sedation.
post #27 of 27
From what I understand using something like Prozac or Buspar (which is what Kerry, the behaviorist) recommended for someone else's cats that were nervous... anyway..I'm not sure which would be right for her, but, the basic idea was to give it to them for several months, and then wean them slowly off of it. I'm guessing that's to alleviate the sudden drug/mood swings, but it's more of a long term than anethesia would be, (and I don't know precisely) but I'm guessing that it's a different effect from the drug. I believe Prozac is a reuptake inhibitor... I'm not sure what Buspar is.. and I don't know what other drugs are offered for cats. I think maybe the key here is figuring out what she's going through.. whether it's fear-based aggression or just plain aggression? I'm thinking it depends on what the underlying issue is as to what you'd give her..

This is something I'd like to find more out about, but unfortunately I haven't done so yet, so I'm limited in my ability to help. I'm so sorry for that little girl, bless her heart.

Let me know if there's anything I can do to help... research, anything.
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