Sunday morning my vet will come to the house to give my sweet little Dougie his final peace and release him from his pain...and all of a sudden I have all these mixed emotions... right now all I can do is cry... I just wish there was something I could do to change things and "save" my sweet sweet cat...if only there was something I could do... if only I would have known... if only I would know he agrees that this is the best decision I could make for him... if only he knows how incredibly much I love him... and how hard it is to let him go... but that I will let him go because I really do truly love him with all my heart. But oh my, I just don't want to miss him, I really really really don't want to miss him. I didn't know such heartache existed. Why why why why why??? If only somebody could answer that. I feel like I am going crazy, i really don't know what to do with myself. Oh my, if I feel this bad now...how on earth am I going to feel sunday. I so love that cat, I wasn't ready to not have him in my life anymore... i still am not ready... it hurts so much, it feels like my heart has been shattered and will never heal again. I am just so sad.
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12/13/02 at 10:52am