Forum Rules

[Anne]

Recent developments last night bring me to this issue. I need to set up forum rules in writing. To be accesible from every page. I think this would help keep this place a friendly community and a homey place on the internet.

I could use your help on this one. So I'm going to start posting my thoughts - things I have had in mind for some time now. Your feedback in this thread will help me a lot.

 

[Anne]

Okay - here are my thoughts. I'll just give them here unedited and tell me what you think. They'll end up as a page with different clauses. I don't want it to be too formal so as not to scare people - just to get the message across.

1. Purpose of this forum.
I think we need to start with a paragraph that explains that this is meant to be a home for cat lovers on the net. That we aim to help cats and their owners. That we want to acheive this by answering questions about cat care to help solve cat-related problems. We also want to give moral and emotional support to cat lovers where needed.

2. Flaming

Flaming is when a member is attacked for a post and usually gets flamed back. I don't want to have flamings in here - I don't like them in other forums and I don't want to see them here.

There are many controversies regarding cats. Here a short list of things that come to mind:
Declawing (no. 1)
spaying and neutering
professional breeding (some people don't like it)
Certain breeds
Letting cats outdoors
Feeding commercial food
Shelters that euthanize

There are more and I think we could compile a longer list if needed.

So there can be lots of flaming problems, especially with the forums growing. I think we should set a rule that says "no flaming of other cat lovers - no matter how much you disagree".

It's okay to try and convice people but the tone should be civil and preferably friendly. This comes back to the purpose of the forum. If you think that someone needs to treat their cat differently, flaming them won't help. Being nice to them and trying to explain your views in a nice manner can be more effective. And it is the benefit of the cats that we all want.

3. Try to follow the forums structure
Place your posts in the appropriate forum. You will help maintain some order in the data that we accumulate and will probably get replies faster and more to the point.

4. Avoid cross-posting
Don't post the same post in several forums. This is called cross-posting and creates a problem. Replies to one thread don't interact with replies to another and hinders a proper discussion.

----------------------------------------------------

This is what I've come with so far. I think we may call it guidelines rather than rules so it wouldn't sound too stern.

What do you think about the whole thing?

 

[sandie]

I think the rules should be there. As long as I dont get the right of voicing my oppinions taken away. In the post that started this whole thing I had posted my view. I have read it several times and don't think I was out of line. I have to keep my mouth shut at work about my views and would not want to do it here.

 

[Anne]

By all means - I think we should all express our views and share them with each other. I don't think there was anything out of line with the way you've said it either. All I'm saying is that we should keep debates civil and that being nice to each other will help the cats better.

 

[hissy]

Is they are passionate in their love for the cat, as well in their beliefs of how to care for the animals. I can't believe this board went to flames? I am so glad I missed it though. To make subjects taboo to talk about, does not promote learning. Until I went to a cat board, I had no opinion of declawing one way or the other, it was after reading some posts (none nice by the way) that I decided to do my own research and have since formed an opionion on the subject. Debating is great as long as it is kept with a civil tongue. I think to many people have short fuses these days and the internet is a good conduit for their frustration. No one knows them, so they can get nasty if they want with no reprisals.

Guys, I may be absent from here for awhile. I have some personal issues brewing but please know I pray for all of you here that post, and wish all of you well.

 

[rene]

Anne, if you are suggesting that we can no longer discuss these issues, I would have to say that our group of rescuers would have no further reason to be on the site. We are here for the sole purpose of educating new cat people as well as sharing cat stories. I would always express my dislike of declawing, as well as answer any questions on behavior. After years of cat rescue, newspaper columns and television shows, I do hold myself out to be a cat behavior/care expert. However, I think myself and all my volunteers need to remember that most people who come to this site for information do not do so with the intentions of being cruel to their own animals. Many do not understand and have not been told by their own vets what is good or not good for their cats. Also, many recuers (I am not included in this) do not like breeders and do not understand how much good many of the breeders do for cats because they are only seeing the hurt that the minority of bad breeders cause. There are lots of misconceptions about some of the new breeds that I feel I need to correct if asked - many of it stems from rumour.

I too gave my opinion in the forum in question and as I reread it I feel it was quite nice - actually I have gotten much nicer since my post to hissy so many months ago (which she has forgiven me for). I never mean to hurt anyone, I only mean to protect the animal and I am sure that is how all my volunteers feel - we just all need to say things in a kinder gentler way - after all, no-one would come onto this site and purposely announce they declawed their cat if they had read previous posts. It is obvious that there was no malice or cruel intentions - actually most vets act as if it is a matter of course and people believe their vets.

Please let me know what your views are on controversial discussions - as much as I love sharing and as much as I appreciate the love and prayers you all shared with me when I lost my Phoebe, I really am here to educate.

 

[Anne]

Of course we can discuss these issues and we need to. These are some of the most important issues where we can really make a difference.

All I meant by the list is to point out the multitude of issues where controversies may come up and to show how many there are. When these come up, we must make a point of being extra polite and friendly - even while expressing total disagreement. Try to condemn the act and not the person.

The reason for this is that I feel that this is the most effective way to get the message across and thus help the cats. As I look back, I can see several cases where forum members were convinced not to declaw, or to spay/neuter their cats, or simply to get them to the vet on time. Each and every time this was acheived it was because these individuals felt welcome and wanted and opened their ears and minds to what we had to say.

So, all I'm saying is, for the good of the cats, let's try and be friendlier to owners - especially to those who seem to be doing wrong to their cats. These are the very cats that need our help and the way to help them is be educating, not by alienating the owners.

By the way, I'm not implying here that that's what any of you are doing! I think 99% of the time people here get great friendly responses from you, Donna and Sandie (and I consider all of them to be expert quality by the way

). This is just to explain the previous post about the list of issues.

I hope I'm making myself clear

... I'd hate to see any of you leave us - you're making a huge contribution here and I really really appreciate it!

 

[threeleggedkat]

Anne; Please call them guidelines (not rules) and encourage (not require) new members to read them. We are all sorry for what happened concerning the declawing issue, but maybe it made us step back and take a needed look. This site is growing very rapidly (and that is a good thing) but we need to remember that every member comes to us (I hope) first and foremost because they love and care about cats. TLK

 

[Anne]

Absolutely - guidelines they will be! And no, I won't make people read or sign them or anything like that - I want to keep a nice cordial atmosphere even when we're "big"

 

[meowman]

OK, today I was home all day and Socrates, by eldest son, kept getting on my lap, purring, butting his head into me and getting loved and rubbed. I love this and am always happy to oblige, even when I'm busy, I ALWAYS take the time for some love from my babies.

Noiw, with Socrates, he might stay for 30 seconds or 10 minutes, then he jumps off and does his own thing, usually lying on the back of the couch, the bed or looking out the window.

Except, today, he kept coming to me for little 2-3 minute sessions of rub, then he'd leave for 5 minutes and then he was back again and then...

Well, you get the drift, right? He was in a seriously affectionate mood all day and I was happy about it, but it's a rare thing from him to be this lovy because he is such an aloof little guy.

How about yours? Do any of you have strange little attention getters that your babies do?

 

[illusion]

Originally posted by Rene
I too gave my opinion in the forum in question and as I reread it I feel it was quite nice - actually I have gotten much nicer since my post to hissy so many months ago (which she has forgiven me for). I never mean to hurt anyone, I only mean to protect the animal and I am sure that is how all my volunteers feel - we just all need to say things in a kinder gentler way - after all, no-one would come onto this site and purposely announce they declawed their cat if they had read previous posts. It is obvious that there was no malice or cruel intentions - actually most vets act as if it is a matter of course and people believe their vets.

Please let me know what your views are on controversial discussions - as much as I love sharing and as much as I appreciate the love and prayers you all shared with me when I lost my Phoebe, I really am here to educate.

*agrees with Rene* I've only been using the forum for a few days now, but I've already seen quite a few people get a not-so-nice reception. I've even physically winced while reading a few posts around the board where someone got snippy with another. I believe that the replies could have been worded in a more civil manner. You catch more flies with honey than with vinegar, so when someone posts something one feels strongly about to the point one gets angry, then that person should push the anger aside and INFORM, not slam. I like controversial, intelligent, discussions, but hate to see people get sniped at.

 

[threeleggedkat]

Illusion;
AMEN, Sister! AMEN!

 

[debby]

Well of course I have to add my two cents here...LOl

Anne, the list you made was WONDERFUL and worded perfectly!!! Rene, noone is saying these issues can't be discussed, they can and SHOULD be discussed, and everyone has a right to express their own opinions here, definately. But what Anne is saying (and I agree) is we should do it in a NICE way!!! No verbal tounge lashings, or intimidating the newer members. Even if we strongly disagree with what they have done....the point is to educate them, and give our views to them....not to insult them and possibly scare them off, which in the end does no good whatsoever for their cat/cats.