Is it the stress???

rang_27

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First I feel crabby today, and I feel like little things that normally don't bother me are really irritating me. This is sort of an on going issue with me. There is a group of people where I work that go out to lunch every Tuesday. They invite differnt people from time to time. I have never been invited, and I guess it really makes me mad. I think it's rude, and it's either one of two things. One, as long as the don't invite me there is someone here to answer the phones and one of the women who goes every week is super selfish and would never want to be left out. Two, is that I'm not a part of their click and I'm not cool enough to be invited. I don't know what it is, but today I heard two women wispering about it and though, "I can still hear you I'm not deaf". So it's really bugging me today, and I need to vent. I'm also wondering what I can do so it doesn't bother me, right now I'd love to say some not so nice words to all of them.
 

zissou'smom

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I always get crabby and little stuff bothers me if I'm coming down with a cold or haven't gotten enough sleep.

But your coworkers are juvenile and rude. Honestly, the lunches should be an open invitation to anyone at work-- we all go out sometimes after work, and anyone who is closing is invited, if you're sitting having lunch anybody can come up and sit with you.

How can grown-ups act like middle-schoolers? I mean, maybe you and they wouldn't really be friends outside of work (and it sounds like you're too cool for them
, not the other way around) but there's no reason to not invite you to eat with them and definitely no reason for them to be whispering about it.

Chalk it up to, they're wasting their time acting like 12-year-olds, and what do you want to eat with them anyway if that's what they're like. Enjoy your time in the office without them and their negative energy there!

 

valanhb

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Originally Posted by Zissou'sMom

Chalk it up to, they're wasting their time acting like 12-year-olds, and what do you want to eat with them anyway if that's what they're like. Enjoy your time in the office without them and their negative energy there!



For some reason, there are some people, mostly women, who can't grow out of middle or high school.
And they are really annoying to those of us who have.


Try not to revert to your own inner child when dealing with them, though I know that's a lot easier said than done.

And yes, it could very well be stress too. I know I get really irritable when I get stressed, and little things bother me that I normally wouldn't care about.

Vent away! I think we've all been there at some point.
 

adymarie

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Originally Posted by Rang_27

First I feel crabby today, and I feel like little things that normally don't bother me are really irritating me. This is sort of an on going issue with me. There is a group of people where I work that go out to lunch every Tuesday. They invite differnt people from time to time. I have never been invited, and I guess it really makes me mad. I think it's rude, and it's either one of two things. One, as long as the don't invite me there is someone here to answer the phones and one of the women who goes every week is super selfish and would never want to be left out. Two, is that I'm not a part of their click and I'm not cool enough to be invited. I don't know what it is, but today I heard two women wispering about it and though, "I can still hear you I'm not deaf". So it's really bugging me today, and I need to vent. I'm also wondering what I can do so it doesn't bother me, right now I'd love to say some not so nice words to all of them.
Are they teenagers? No, well they act like it. I have a similar proba at work - a little click of women stand right beside my desk, gossipping forever (honestly at least 2 hours out of an 8 hour day). If you don't want to include me, fine, just go away so I can't see you and my clients can't hear you when I am on the phone with them!

I'll go to lunch with you....I need a click to hang out with....wanna join the one I'm forming for TCSer only?
 

jaffacake

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I know exactly what you mean. It`s the kind of thing that happens at my work and really ticks me off

But you just have to remind yourself that if that`s the way they behave, they`re not worth spending time with or talking to.
 

lunasmom

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Ugh- there are going to be cliques like that every where you go. I worked here a year and a half before I was finally invited out to lunch with a group.

Heck, at my last job i was labeled one of those "invite-only" people. The girl that wanted to go with us never wanted to each lunch until 2 or 3 pm! All of us were always in by 8:30 am (and leave at 5:00pm) every day. So why woudl I want to STARVE until 3 pm just to make someone else happy? Call me selfish, but I don't care "how fast" it makes the afternoon go...I simply could not wait until 3!!!

Don't try to let it get to you. Yes it would be fun to go to lunch and get the gossip, but in all honesty, I find that the "group lunches" turn into a complaint-fest about work. Then you just become really negative about where you work...at least that's been my experience
 

bonnie1965

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I am one of those who rarely is invited. I have found over time that this is a good thing. The person who is not standing around gossiping/complaining is probably more appreciated by the higher ups.

You know the way they behave isn't right so that makes you more mature than they are. Still hurts to not be included, but like someone else said, you probably wouldn't like them if you did know them
 

carolpetunia

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Agreeing with Bonnie. I've always found myself extremely uncomfortable with gossipy, backbiting, junior-high-mentality types, anyway... and I'm just not willing to play their reindeer games.

It's good that you're staying above the fray!
 
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