Not Every Furbaby can Be Saved *sob*

Dear Mags,

I am so very sorry for your loss. I know that you are fairly new to having pets at all. It must be very painful to lose a furbaby for the first time.

Please forgive me if what I'm going to say next hurts your feelings. I feel compelled to say that so that others will learn and other cats may be saved.

Behavior problems are the main reason why pets are put down. This is often just plain unnecessary. Vets are often not qualified to deal with behavior problems and offer either no advice or the wrong advice. Litter box problems and aggression are the two most common complaints I get to deal with and so far in 100% of the cases I have succeeded in bringing on a behavior modification - provided that the owners were willing to follow my advice (which unfortunately is not always the case - some people find it easier to just either dump the cat at the shelter or put her to sleep).

Litter box problems, as well as most other behavior problems are solvable. It may take some time and effort but it can be done. By the way, there are no magic solutions either. When I treat a cat for a behavior problem the meeting lasts anything from 1 hour to 3. I need to learn a lot about the cat, the owner and the situation to figure out exactly where the problem is and come up with a plan. Sometimes we need to change the plan as we go and find something more effective.

Mags, what was done was done - and I'm not blaming you either. Vets can be very persuasive in these things and we all tend to listen to people in white robes. I'm sorry if what I'm saying increases the pain. I had to say that for the sake of your future cats as well as the cats of other members and visitors to this board. Again, my deepest sympathies to you!

I'm sorry for your loss, that must have been a difficult decision to make w/ such a young kitten.

But I have to say, so others don't think that this is the solution for these problems, that behavioral issues are treatable. And putting an animal down for something like litter box problems is not the only solution. We have many members here who are experts in Feline Behavior, and who have led many of our members to success with treating litter box problems. It just takes time and patience. I only hope that in the future we can save more of these poor kittens instead of letting vets convince people that euthanizing is the only option.



Again, my sympathies to you. I hope your kitten is happy at the Rainbow Bridge now, and looking down upon you.

I am shocked that the vet advised this. When I saw the title of your subject I was certain your kitten must have had a terminal disease. This is truly heartbreaking. I thought the vet's oath was something like the medical doctor's, "primo non nocere," first, do no harm. I am truly sorry this poor baby died for that reason. What a tragedy! I fear my words are insufficient to comfort you.

That's sad.

P.S. Find a new vet.

I feel really, really bad for this kitten!!!

Oh Mags.....I am sorry for your pain but I have to agree with everyone else on this one. The fact is that Doofus was just a kitten. I am so sad that things had to end this way.

The reason being is that I went through something similar in June 2002. Whiskers is not a kitten but, her behavior changed suddenly and she too was dirtying everywhere for no reason. I mean, everywhere....on the beds, on the couch, on our freezer, on our water machine. It was not a fun thing to live through. And yes, sometime during this experience, I did have thoughts of having her put down because she even had a funny look in her eyes and I was frightened of her. I knew something was wrong. The vet really did not help me much. To be honest, TCS is where I was led to. Out of anger of having to clean constantly and of being hissed at etc....I seeked advice here. And boy was I ever bombarded with support, advice, encouragment. I was emotionally exhausted. Not only was I fed up of cleaning after her, I was just plain tired. I ended up purchasing 3 more litterboxes and scattering them around the basement. That was the beginning of the end of a bad situation.

After some time (I'm not even sure I can remember how long this problem lasted but it seemed like forever to me), Whiskers gradually came back to her old self.

The conclusion was that my grandmother had given me a geranium and we think Whiskers may have ate the leaves (or the flower itself???) and apparently it is toxic. I got rid of the plant and so far so good. She has not relapsed at all.

Although the past is the past and you cannot change that. Please know that there are many options out here. And there are many reasons for behavioral changes.

I agree with BuNN...find a different vet. You should have been given different options.

I wish you the best with your new kitten. And please.....just know we are all here for you if ever you need help!

Good luck.

Here's a (((HUG))) for you. I really want you to know that even in tough times, there are friends waiting to give you support.

Mags
I remember when you told us about that litter of kittens and how concerned you were about them. I am so very sad to read this latest post from you. What happened isn't your fault at all, but it is a valuable learning experience. I agree with Whisker's mom, whenever there is a problem please post it on this board, we are all here to help each other and there are people here who are very knowledgeable experts. You might also find answers to problems if you search thru the archieved threads, they're full of good information.

My thoughts are with you at this sad time.

:angel2:

I guess it's just a coincidence but Esper's name is similar to esperar, Spanish for "to hope." Most cats are fastidious about covering their waste, but if you should have any problems at all, please ask about it in the Behavior forum. There are numerous things you can do. I wish you and the new kitten the best.

Mags, I'm very sorry to hear about Doofus. She had a very tough start in life, and I'm sure she was very traumatized. Especially hearing about her nightmares. Hers was a sad story from start to finish, but I know that you did love her while she was there.

Good luck with Esper. If you have any problems with him, please ask. There's absolutely no shame in asking for help. Anne is a full fledged Cat Behaviourist, so she can usually help in even the most difficult situations.