Local Yokels:
* "England? Can you get there by train?" -- Asked of an English tourist in the United States.
* "England? That's in London, isn't it?" -- Asked of an English tourist in the United States.
* "England? That's near Paris, the city of love!" -- Asked of an English tourist in the United States.
* "Do they have beer there?" -- Asked of an English tourist in a bar in the United States.
* "So, you guys are from Ireland -- did you drive across?" -- Asked of two Irish women on a trip to Delaware.
* "You're from New Zealand, aren't you? That's just off the southeast corner of Canada, isn't it?" -- Asked of a New Zealander on a trip to Washington D.C.
* "After moving here, how were you able to know what the speed limit was? Could you read our traffic signs?" -- Asked of a Canadian who moved to the United States.
* "You're from America? Do you know my cousin Patrick in Chicago?" -- Asked of a tourist from Connecticut in Ireland.
* "New Zealand is a state in Australia, right?" -- Asked of an Australian, travelling abroad.
* "How do you get around, since you don't have any cars?" -- Asked of an Australian, travelling abroad.
* "You don't have electricity there, do you?" -- Asked of an Australian, travelling abroad.
Tourists Without a Clue:
* "Would it be cheaper to fly to California and then take the train to Hawaii?" -- Asked of a travel agent about travel arrangements to Hawaii.
* "Does your flag come in any other colors?" -- Asked by a tourist in Victoria, British Columbia, Canada.
* "Excuse me, is this the Eiffel Tower?" - Asked by one tourist of another while waiting in line for the CN Tower in Toronto.
* "Were these steps always here, or did they build them?" -- Asked of a guide at Mitchelstown Caves, Cork, Ireland. The guide jokingly replied, "No, but the electricity was!" and the tourist said, "Oh, really, wow!"
* "Can you smell the smoke from the bush fire?" -- Asked of a resident of Perth, Australia, about a fire in Sydney.
* "How long does it take the penguins to migrate to Kelly Tarlton's?" -- Asked at the Auckland, New Zealand, Visitor Information Centre; Kelly Tarlton's is an aquarium which features penguins.
* "Which parks have swings for six-year-old babies?" -- Asked at the Auckland, New Zealand, Visitor Information Centre.
* "Can I get a ferry to Australia?" -- Asked at the Auckland, New Zealand, Visitor Information Centre.
* "Can you tell me where the Sky Tower is?" -- Asked at the Auckland, New Zealand, Visitor Information Centre; the Sky Tower in Auckland is the tallest building in the southern hemisphere and difficult to miss.
* "How does the snow get up Ben Nevis?" -- Asked of a tourist information center in Scotland, referring to the United Kingdom's highest mountain.
* "What time do the penguins leave the zoo?" -- Asked of a tourist information center in Scotland.
* "Is there anyone here who speaks Australian?" -- Asked of a tourist information center in Scotland.
* "Is Fort William still alive?" -- Asked of a tourist information center in Scotland.
Bon Voyage:
* "Oh, are you going to drive there?" -- Asked repeatedly of a couple moving to Iceland.
* "How does Canadian sound? I don't think I've ever heard that language before." -- Asked after a friend told him about his vacation in Canada.
International Business:
* "You guys are working on the Fourth of July? I can't believe it! Don't you celebrate it?" -- Asked of an English employee by an American employee of a international company.
Geography:
* "What do you mean New Hampshire's a long distance call?! It's part of Massachusetts!" -- Declared by someone who grew up in Boston.
* "Vermont is a state?" -- Asked of a contractor that provided long-distance information for AT&T.
* "What state is Minnesota in?" -- Overheard in a store.
* "Sorry, we don't sell tickets outside of the U.S. . . . I don't care how new Mexico is, we don't sell tickets outside the U.S." -- A ticket salesperson for the 1996 Olympics, on the phone with someone from New Mexico.
* "What countries belong to the Netherlands? France...Belgium?"
* "I'm from West Virginia."
"So, what's life like in western Virginia?"
"No, I said West Virginia."
"You know, you're the third person I've talked to from western Virginia, and I will never understand why you don't just say you're from Virginia. It's not that bad of a place!"
-- A conversation between a West Virginian and a Californian.
* "I didn't know you could drive to Europe." -- An eavesdropper, piping in when he overheard a conversation about someone who had driven to Montreal.
Geography Anecdote:
* Caller: "Hello. I'm calling about [a product]. I need to talk to one of your technical people so I can assess the product's suitability for a proposal I'm writing."
* Operator: "Sure. So I may route your call more effectively, please tell me the region from which you are calling."
* Caller: "Auckland, New Zealand."
* Operator: "Sir, in which state is that?"
* Caller: (chuckles) "Quite a good one actually, but with recent elections you never know!"
* Operator: "Sir, I need you to tell me which state Auckland New Zealand is in so I can route your call."
* Caller: "Oh. New Zealand is not in any state. It is a country in the South Pacific, near Australia. Auckland is a city in New Zealand."
* Operator: "Thank you, sir. I have Australia -- putting you through now."
* Caller: "No--" (click)
* "England? Can you get there by train?" -- Asked of an English tourist in the United States.
* "England? That's in London, isn't it?" -- Asked of an English tourist in the United States.
* "England? That's near Paris, the city of love!" -- Asked of an English tourist in the United States.
* "Do they have beer there?" -- Asked of an English tourist in a bar in the United States.
* "So, you guys are from Ireland -- did you drive across?" -- Asked of two Irish women on a trip to Delaware.
* "You're from New Zealand, aren't you? That's just off the southeast corner of Canada, isn't it?" -- Asked of a New Zealander on a trip to Washington D.C.
* "After moving here, how were you able to know what the speed limit was? Could you read our traffic signs?" -- Asked of a Canadian who moved to the United States.
* "You're from America? Do you know my cousin Patrick in Chicago?" -- Asked of a tourist from Connecticut in Ireland.
* "New Zealand is a state in Australia, right?" -- Asked of an Australian, travelling abroad.
* "How do you get around, since you don't have any cars?" -- Asked of an Australian, travelling abroad.
* "You don't have electricity there, do you?" -- Asked of an Australian, travelling abroad.
Tourists Without a Clue:
* "Would it be cheaper to fly to California and then take the train to Hawaii?" -- Asked of a travel agent about travel arrangements to Hawaii.
* "Does your flag come in any other colors?" -- Asked by a tourist in Victoria, British Columbia, Canada.
* "Excuse me, is this the Eiffel Tower?" - Asked by one tourist of another while waiting in line for the CN Tower in Toronto.
* "Were these steps always here, or did they build them?" -- Asked of a guide at Mitchelstown Caves, Cork, Ireland. The guide jokingly replied, "No, but the electricity was!" and the tourist said, "Oh, really, wow!"
* "Can you smell the smoke from the bush fire?" -- Asked of a resident of Perth, Australia, about a fire in Sydney.
* "How long does it take the penguins to migrate to Kelly Tarlton's?" -- Asked at the Auckland, New Zealand, Visitor Information Centre; Kelly Tarlton's is an aquarium which features penguins.
* "Which parks have swings for six-year-old babies?" -- Asked at the Auckland, New Zealand, Visitor Information Centre.
* "Can I get a ferry to Australia?" -- Asked at the Auckland, New Zealand, Visitor Information Centre.
* "Can you tell me where the Sky Tower is?" -- Asked at the Auckland, New Zealand, Visitor Information Centre; the Sky Tower in Auckland is the tallest building in the southern hemisphere and difficult to miss.
* "How does the snow get up Ben Nevis?" -- Asked of a tourist information center in Scotland, referring to the United Kingdom's highest mountain.
* "What time do the penguins leave the zoo?" -- Asked of a tourist information center in Scotland.
* "Is there anyone here who speaks Australian?" -- Asked of a tourist information center in Scotland.
* "Is Fort William still alive?" -- Asked of a tourist information center in Scotland.
Bon Voyage:
* "Oh, are you going to drive there?" -- Asked repeatedly of a couple moving to Iceland.
* "How does Canadian sound? I don't think I've ever heard that language before." -- Asked after a friend told him about his vacation in Canada.
International Business:
* "You guys are working on the Fourth of July? I can't believe it! Don't you celebrate it?" -- Asked of an English employee by an American employee of a international company.
Geography:
* "What do you mean New Hampshire's a long distance call?! It's part of Massachusetts!" -- Declared by someone who grew up in Boston.
* "Vermont is a state?" -- Asked of a contractor that provided long-distance information for AT&T.
* "What state is Minnesota in?" -- Overheard in a store.
* "Sorry, we don't sell tickets outside of the U.S. . . . I don't care how new Mexico is, we don't sell tickets outside the U.S." -- A ticket salesperson for the 1996 Olympics, on the phone with someone from New Mexico.
* "What countries belong to the Netherlands? France...Belgium?"
* "I'm from West Virginia."
"So, what's life like in western Virginia?"
"No, I said West Virginia."
"You know, you're the third person I've talked to from western Virginia, and I will never understand why you don't just say you're from Virginia. It's not that bad of a place!"
-- A conversation between a West Virginian and a Californian.
* "I didn't know you could drive to Europe." -- An eavesdropper, piping in when he overheard a conversation about someone who had driven to Montreal.
Geography Anecdote:
* Caller: "Hello. I'm calling about [a product]. I need to talk to one of your technical people so I can assess the product's suitability for a proposal I'm writing."
* Operator: "Sure. So I may route your call more effectively, please tell me the region from which you are calling."
* Caller: "Auckland, New Zealand."
* Operator: "Sir, in which state is that?"
* Caller: (chuckles) "Quite a good one actually, but with recent elections you never know!"
* Operator: "Sir, I need you to tell me which state Auckland New Zealand is in so I can route your call."
* Caller: "Oh. New Zealand is not in any state. It is a country in the South Pacific, near Australia. Auckland is a city in New Zealand."
* Operator: "Thank you, sir. I have Australia -- putting you through now."
* Caller: "No--" (click)
