Is it June yet?

Have you ever had a bad month? Where bad news seems to come from every direction and unexpected expenses complicate an already strained budget? We're having one.

Money was already tight because my cousin is getting married and we had to buy my boyfriend a suit. It's less than 2 weeks until the big day and we still need a dress for me, shoes, shirt and tie for him, a present for the wedding and enough money set aside to drive down and pay for our hotel room.

Then, the bad news started.

First of all, my boyfriend finally went in for pre-physical bloodwork and we were called into the doctor, which was a huge issue for him. He's been avoiding doctors because he's afraid he'll be told he has cancer or something. Well, he doesn't have cancer (thank god), but he does have diabetes. At 25 years old, he now has had to make drastic changes to his diet. It's been a lot of stress and worry for him. He is dealing with it well, I think, but every time his sugar is at all high, he gets so upset. Overall, he is not his normal self. Plus, diabetes supplies (especially test strips!) and healthy food choices are not cheap. We basically cleaned out our entire kitchen and then had to do a whole new shop for things that he can have.

Then, BF's best friend, considered a brother, came home from work to find his gf had left and taken his son. He's pursuing it, as they have an agreement for joint custody, but the way the court system favours the mother around here it could be more than 2 months before they can compel her to honour that agreement, even though she's already refused to let him see the boy on HIS weekend and won't confirm the existance of or give the address of her new apartment. Plus, because she took all the kid's clothes and crib etc when she left, he's had to try to find replacements so he's prepared if/when she relents or the courts step in. I spent a bit of money buying a junior bed for the little guy, which was reasonably priced but picking it (and a futon for us) up cost a lot of gas money.

Now, Max has been tentatively diagnosed with an autoimmune disorder. I feel horrible for him, but we can't find the money to do the biopsy and pursue treatment yet. It's going to be $400 just for the testing.

My boyfriend says he's just waiting to see what will come up next. So, I ask you...Is it June YET??????

Sorry you are having such a horrible month. That was my April (MIL dying, hubby getting ill, etc). I hope things get better! As for the diabetic supplies as at your doctors office if they have any samples they can give you due to your financial situation. Dr's often have cupboards full of freebee to give. Good luck.

That really sucks! Is there anyway you can talk to your cousin about maybe skipping the wedding (if that is even an option) or staying with family or friends at hteir house close by?

Diabetes is awful. My boss had it. I am glad your BF is taking care of things. I have seen the effects of the disease on someone who doesn't take care of themselves and it is NOT a pretty sight.

Max is in my prayers, as are you!

I agree, a lousy month for you folks.

I think you may find that when you start eating healthier you may notice your actual food bill go down since you won't be spending money on pre-packaged, msg laden and no-nutrient fast foods and you'll end up feeling much better overall at a fraction of the price.

ooh! That sounds really tough, I really hope everything goes OK for you.

Oh bless your heart ... sometimes life can really kick us square in the guts, can't it? But you know, as simple as this may sound now, just about everything can be considered temporary. It ~will~ change. There are certain truths to life that cannot be denied, and this is one of them.

When things seem to strike all at once like they have for you, it can be such a blessing to sit down and write out the Master List of Priorities. What of all the things that are happening at the moment is the Number One Most Important - your milage may vary, but for me, that would be the health of my partner. So ... you have that, now what comes next? You see where I am going with this?

Once you determine your priorities, you can then set aside portions of your budget to take care of those things, all in the order they appear on your list ... if health supplies and a more nutritious diet are needed to address the Number One Most Important priority of your partner's health, then devote the largest portion of the budget to that. Then on to the second thing on your list, devote a portion to that and so on right down your list.

You might just find that by doing this, you actually save money in the long run and are accomplishing much much more than you can by spinning your wheels.

I admit I cannot know the importance of attending your cousin's wedding, but it would seem to me that if it were a requirement, you could take Phenomsmom's advice about staying with family or other friends while there ... and you can always dress on the cheap by shopping at say ... Target (which has some ~really~ cute dresses for younger women!!) and save a little bit there. Shirts, ties and shoes are also available at such places and are not nearly as expensive as buying "nice". Honestly, I would love to shop the department stores, but since I have been off from working as much as I normally do, I simply cannot afford it anymore. I don't know if you have a Kohl's nearby you, but they also have wonderful stuff, normally for very reasonable prices. You have to really look for the bargains sometimes, but they are there.

I sincerely hope your life will calm down soon ... I am also looking forward to the start of a new month - I don't particularly welcome the hot, humid, summer days of the Southern Atlantic states, but each passing month brings me that much closer to a health goal being completed and so I do look forward to those milestones.

Originally Posted by Yosemite

I think you may find that when you start eating healthier you may notice your actual food bill go down since you won't be spending money on pre-packaged, msg laden and no-nutrient fast foods and you'll end up feeling much better overall at a fraction of the price.

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Oh, that's for sure. It's cheaper to shop now, but we had to get rid of all his "temptations" and replace them with alternatives, so the initial shop was quite daunting. Now, though, restocking isn't such a big deal. One thing I've noticed....we're going through WAY more eggs.

Originally Posted by gayef

When things seem to strike all at once like they have for you, it can be such a blessing to sit down and write out the Master List of Priorities. What of all the things that are happening at the moment is the Number One Most Important - your milage may vary, but for me, that would be the health of my partner. So ... you have that, now what comes next? You see where I am going with this?

Click to expand...

I know what you mean. We're so broke this month because this is exactly what I've been doing. Whatever bf needed to feel better (supplies, snacks, etc) I've bought. Same goes for getting Max to the vet. And even though I maybe should have kept the money a bit longer, I wanted to get that bed for our friend. I can't imagine how it must feel to come home and look into your son's room and see it empty.

Originally Posted by Phenomsmom

That really sucks! Is there anyway you can talk to your cousin about maybe skipping the wedding (if that is even an option) or staying with family or friends at hteir house close by?

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My mom and dad will pay for our room if I ask. They are paying for my sister and brother's rooms. I just don't like letting them pay for things if I can help it, so I'm going to do my best to do it myself. My dad just had my car fixed (it's ready for tomorrow) because I asked him to have his friend (and one of my best friends' dad) do an oil change. He found a bunch of problems and I don't know what it must have cost! I know my mom would be irked if I asked for the hotel thing after that, even though I didn't ask my dad to have it fixed. But, once our income tax comes, it'll be fine. We're not too bad off, it's just been a tougher month to budget.

I have to go to my cousin's wedding. It'd be a huge thing if I missed it and I want to go. Bf and I deserve a nice night out.

Thanks again to everyone for all the good thoughts.