People who can't keep their cats.

Originally Posted by AlleyGirl

As for people who have to give them up because they get caught by the landlord... wth are they doing getting one in the first place??!?!?!

Click to expand...

Ordinarily I'd completely agree with this statement, but then I was put in this situation myself.

I found Tryon when I was in NY visiting one of my friends. She was on the street and starved half to death. I tried to get her into a local shelter, but it was 11pm and none were open. So I borrowed a carrier and brought her back to my mom's house (where I was staying) so I could try and get her into a shelter the next day. When I went there, not only did the guy tell me they weren't accepting any more cats, but when I told him I needed to find a place for her because I was flying back home the next day, he yelled at me for not thinking of this sooner! I hadn't even had her in my possession a full 24 hours yet! My only options at that point were to put her back on the street or fly her back home with me. So I flew her home... to an apartment with a 2 pet limit where I already had 2 dogs. Once I got her, all the no kill shelters were full and my local county shelter has something like a 70% kill rate (they have the numbers posted in the lobby). I was surely not going to bring her somewhere where she'd almost definitely be killed. If I was going to do that, I would have left her on the street.

Sure, it was a true trying to hide her from my landlord, but I knew my lease was up soon and I was buying a house.

That said, I am not an advocate of people going out and actively adopting cats when their landlord doesn't allow cats... but I can also say in this situation, I personally felt I had no other choice than to take her home and hide her for a few months.

Originally Posted by LaRussa

Oh hell, that's just bullcrap. Tell the boyfriend there are medications he can take for his allergies. I wouldn't give up my pet for any guy, if the guy won't take meds, get rid of him cuz he's not worth be married to.

Click to expand...

You read my mind.

My first criteria for picking someone to date is that they get along with all my animals. My dogs/cats will be with me for 10/15/20 years. If you can't stick that out then you're not worth dating, let alone marrying.

Luckily DH is just as much of a sucker for 4 footed furry creatures as I am

Originally Posted by Ali012281

I am heartbroke that I had to give away my cat... but the 15 hour flight and ten day quarentine would have been too much for her. She doesn't eat when caged and ten days would have been much too long for her.

I was lucky to find a wonderful family for her that was understanding of the situation.

Crittermom: I very much agree with your last comment. It is hard and unfair to place judgement on a situation you've never been in.

Click to expand...

I was in the situation as well and had to find homes for 5 cats and a bunny when I moved from Guam back to the states. Not only would the 20 hour flight not have been good for them, but I just couldn't afford to pay for 6 animals to fly to the other side of the world. Plus, these animals had never known temps under 70 degrees...I was moving back to Maryland in the middle of January to take care of my mom after my dad died and mom was allergic so they would have to be outdoor cats (and bunny). The best thing for them was to find them new homes, and I was heartbroken. They were my family and I still cry sometimes thinking about them. Luckily, I was able to find good homes for them.

But, I do agree, some people get rid of pets for the stupidest reasons.

Originally Posted by crittermom

Sometimes there are times when it IS best for the animal to be rehomed.I have had to do it and I'm sure that are other members here that have had to as well.
Until you have walked in that persons shoes, I don't feel that anyone can fairly judge them.

Click to expand...

I agree

i once had to rehome someone cause at that pt is was the right thing to do

Would re-homing my Ophelia be wrong?

No. In many cases, allergies can be worked through. In some case, though, they can't. That is when you must act responsibly & find a good home. You don't dump them outside, etc.

Allergies are a tricky one - if you have severe allergies, then yes, rehome the cat by all means, I dont agree with keeping them if it can potentially kill you. Sadly, a lot of people use allergies as an excuse without trying things first, or the doc says it is the cat without doing tests, and the people believe them - they tried that with my mum when I was a child, she refused to get rid of the cat, and I have had up to 6 here, so it is obvious mine isnt cat related (I can be worse at work to be honest). Some of the cats I have here at the moment, and have had, have come through 'poor' reasons, such as Tiger - her owner wanted her pts because he had had enough of her being destructive (although he told me she was too much of a burden) - she was 13, I dont know how anyone can have a cat from a kitten and then do soemthing like that, but she is better off here, he said he couldn't stroke her, I do it numerous times a day, and there has been a major improvement, so she is in a better situation. Shabba's owners rehomed him cos they couldn't trust him with the baby - before the baby was even born!! So he is in a better place too. IT does get frustrating dealing with some of the reasons people are willing to give up their cats, but for the most part, I think it is better on the cat. I should have rehomed one of my cats, but I couldn't admit that things were bad, the situation was resolved for me when she became ill, and it was only after that that I realised just how much I had put my other cat through, and if I was in that situation again, I would do it differently.

Every once in a while there are extenuating circumstances that make it understandable that you have to give up your pet. But I honestly have no respect for people who give up their pets for no real reason and without trying to work things out in an attempt to keep their animal.

Originally Posted by TigerOnTheProwl

Every once in a while there are extenuating circumstances that make it understandable that you have to give up your pet. But I honestly have no respect for people who give up their pets for no real reason and without trying to work things out in an attempt to keep their animal.

Click to expand...

I see SO many emails at work of people trying to find a new home for their pet. They'll say things like "I've had Fluffy for 16 years, but my new apartment doesn't allow pets". What, and you couldn't find an apartment that DOES allow pets?!?! Or given how long you've had the pet, you couldn't find a friend or close family member who could help Fluffy live out their last few years?

Or my favourite one from recently was people moving to Australia in 2 weeks time, and they realised they better find homes for their 5 and 7 year old cats. Did they only just realise they were moving?!?!

We rehomed our kitty when we moved to the US - we only took her in because she was going to get taken to the humane society and most probably euthanised (12 year old cat going to a full HS during kitten season...), and she was too nice a kitty to just get dumped like that. My plan always was to find her a good home before we moved (we knew moving to the US was most probably going to happen at that point), so I made sure I advertised widely, and well before we moved and found her the perfect home.

If people wait until the last minute to find a new home for their cat because they've been stupid or haven't bothered to try and keep their companion, then yes - that is absolutely inexcusable. And when you see those emails come out, you absolutely do wonder how hard they've tried!

A lot of people here seem to think that allergies are always just minor inconveniences that can be lived with if the appropriate medication is obtained.

As someone who, as a child, saw my brother cope with the death of his best friend to a severe asthma attack, and has also seen my brother go into anaphylactic shock and nearly die as his respiratory system failed and his organs started to shut down one by one, I just want to point out that allergies can be life-threatening.

It is easy to say 'I would never....' but really unless you know the exact extent of the allergic reaction, you should not assume that it's hives and sneezing and can be lived with - because many allergies can lead to death.

Originally Posted by Epona

A lot of people here seem to think that allergies are always just minor inconveniences that can be lived with if the appropriate medication is obtained.

As someone who, as a child, saw my brother cope with the death of his best friend to a severe asthma attack, and has also seen my brother go into anaphylactic shock and nearly die as his respiratory system failed and his organs started to shut down one by one, I just want to point out that allergies can be life-threatening.

It is easy to say 'I would never....' but really unless you know the exact extent of the allergic reaction, you should not assume that it's hives and sneezing and can be lived with - because many allergies can lead to death.

Click to expand...

I must say I wholeheartedly agree with you. My husband is affected so much by some cats that his nose and throat close off. Other cats give him watery eyes and a scratchy throat. Still others, hardly no reaction at all. (Cricket, thank goodness)
We have been lucky enough to find two cats who needed to live outside and are not "in your face" type cats. Not feral, but independent. So Cricket is occasionally allowed to come inside for a nap on the sofa, on her blanket, which is taken outside and shook throughly after she awakes and goes back out.
However, if my dh gets a reaction, it leads to big problems for him. He is not able to take anti-histamines and has a deviated septum which causes any sinus trouble at all to escalate into a bacterial infection, due to improper drainage. Then because of his allergy to penicillin, he has to take very expensive antibiotics and steriods, just to breathe. Add all this to the fact that he works outside and has hayfever...
it would be very cruel for me to expect him to live inside with a cat, just because I want one in the house.
dh is very kind with the cats, pets them and then comes inside and washes from the elbows down and changes his shirt, to keep a reaction from starting.
at one point we had a cat here that was longhaired and she was a "jump up in your lap and be in your face" kind of girl. dh couldn't even sit outside on the porch swing with me, he'd have to get up and go in the house, so he could breathe. We re-homed her with a friend who keeps her inside and doesn't have any allergies, so Miss Kitty can be all up in their face.
Now, some of you probably think I shouldn't have cats outside. Save the speeches...my cats have a wonderful life, a cedar potting shed with a litter box (located under some shade trees and with a window that opens )and heated beds for the winter, and all the food and water they can consume. They get groomed every day, loved on all the time, and are utd on all vaccines and on Frontline Plus. I love them very much, but I must say, I love my husband more. If anybody has issue with that, too bad. I have to say: I would seriously doubt someone who says they love me, but they love their pet more. I would definitely not commit to a relationship with them.
I do want to make clear that I don't think it's ever acceptable to "dispose of" or dump a pet, under any circumstances. But there are times when re-homing just cannot be helped.

I don't think anyone here is saying " Oh, you have allergies... you must live with the cats, that's a poor excuse" It's just that there are soooo many people that say they have allergies. How many people actually do?

Well, when I was looking for a cat (before I found PHX) I called some people off of craigslist and I ALWAYS ask "Why are you getting rid of your cat?" numerous times I heard "Because I'm allergic to cats." Then I ask, "Oh, really.... did you go to the doctor and get testing done?" And 85% of the time I got a "No, but I get sick and start sneezing/wheezing/puking/hives/can't breathe around cats so thats how I know I'm allergic" Now that's a poor excuse- You haven't even got tested.... how do you know it's the cat your allergic to? I think it's just an easy escape goat because you don't want the cat anymore... If your really in love with the cat you would go through all options BEFORE getting rid of the cat...

But, if someone does rehome their cat for this reason or other stupid reason... I think it's best for the cat because it probably wasn't given all the love and attention and proper care that it needs. Maybe if it's rehomed it will actually go to the right home

i got raven and nabu because they were being rehomed. apparently if you put the word out you are looking for a cat, you get 2. the guy i got raven and nabu from had broken up with his GF, who he had been living with, and the cats were for his kids. well, when they broke up, she didn't want the cats and he couldn't take them. i think he was in temporary housing. he thought he found a home for them, but when it didn't work out, and i was looking -- well you know the rest. i commend him for going the extra mile when the first home didn't work out. i know the first home wouldn't have shelled out the thousands of dollars i've spent on raven's health issues over the years. she was keeping 2 declawed cats outside only, at 1 1/2 yrs old they weighed 7 lbs, and she was going to take them to the shelter in the height of kitten season. she just didn't want them anymore. the original owner had legit reasons he couldn't keep them.

stimpy was a shelter cat. he was dumped at the door in a carrier. that is not acceptable in my book. but at least he was at the shelter in a carrier. some people dumped cats not contained, and animal control had to go try to find them.

after working at a shelter a few years ago, i've heard just about everything. you can usually pick out the legit reasons from the college student moving out at the end of school who suddenly has "allergies". shelter staff are usually pretty knowledgeable about it, and do their best to find homes for the critters. and for those who've had shelter staff be rude, that's awful. they really shouldn't be like that. it's a customer service type job, and being nice gets more critters adopted.

Originally Posted by mybabyphx

I don't think anyone here is saying " Oh, you have allergies... you must live with the cats, that's a poor excuse" It's just that there are soooo many people that say they have allergies. How many people actually do?

Well, when I was looking for a cat (before I found PHX) I called some people off of craigslist and I ALWAYS ask "Why are you getting rid of your cat?" numerous times I heard "Because I'm allergic to cats." Then I ask, "Oh, really.... did you go to the doctor and get testing done?" And 85% of the time I got a "No, but I get sick and start sneezing/wheezing/puking/hives/can't breathe around cats so thats how I know I'm allergic" Now that's a poor excuse- You haven't even got tested.... how do you know it's the cat your allergic to? I think it's just an easy escape goat because you don't want the cat anymore... If your really in love with the cat you would go through all options BEFORE getting rid of the cat...

But, if someone does rehome their cat for this reason or other stupid reason... I think it's best for the cat because it probably wasn't given all the love and attention and proper care that it needs. Maybe if it's rehomed it will actually go to the right home

Click to expand...

I agree. Why wouldn't you take the test so you know what is making you sick? But no most people feel that they can just use pets as an excuse because many people (supposedly) are allergic to them. And what is worse is when the people have had the cat for a long time. If you're allergic to it then at least have it rehomed early in it's life so it could get used to being around someone else instead of just drudging and moping because you're not there.

I could never get rid of Trout. Not for a guy, not for an allergy, not for an apartment.

The only possible way would be if I had a child, and the child was deathly allergic with no cure.

I know right! LOL I wouldn't get rid of my cat for NOTHING!!! I don't care...

It would be like as if your dating someone and they tell you that they are allergic to your baby, your human baby that youve spent all your time love and money on to be happy. Then your person that your dating suddenly says hes allergic to your baby and you must get rid of him... well its your baby- who do you pick???


i think of PHX as my baby... so thats why i am relating the two... i dont have any real kids so PHX is all i got!

Originally Posted by Trouts mom

I could never get rid of Trout. Not for a guy, not for an allergy, not for an apartment.

The only possible way would be if I had a child, and the child was deathly allergic with no cure.

Click to expand...

Same here. If I ever get a mate cat allergy questions will be at the top of the list.
I saw an ad on CL with a 13 yr old cat this woman had since it was a kitten. She needed to rehome it because her new hubby didn't like cats! I just don't understand how these things don't come up in conversations until AFTER the wedding vows. Sheesh.

With so many people, pets simply aren't a priority. Rehoming to homes that actually want a cat is a good thing. Dumping a cat for convenience just because they just don't fit your lifestyle any longer? No way.

Originally Posted by mybabyphx

I know right! LOL I wouldn't get rid of my cat for NOTHING!!! I don't care...

It would be like as if your dating someone and they tell you that they are allergic to your baby, your human baby that youve spent all your time love and money on to be happy. Then your person that your dating suddenly says hes allergic to your baby and you must get rid of him... well its your baby- who do you pick???


i think of PHX as my baby... so thats why i am relating the two... i dont have any real kids so PHX is all i got!

Click to expand...

Exactly how I feel and how anyone with pets should feel. They are living breathing beings with feelings and hearts. They are a family member, and that is IT.

Yep you're exactly right Nat. They aren't possessions, they are family. That's why if I am thinking about getting involved with someone, the first thing I ask her is "How do you feel about cats?".

In regards to allergies, I would love testing to find out why I take antihistamines every single day, all year round, but my doc wont do it, there reason is that most of the things we are allergic to can't be avoided - but if I knew what they were, I could at least take steps to reduce my contact with them!! With moving, I dont think it is always that easy to find places where you can take animals, what annoys me is that they leave it so close to moving, of course they know they are going!! I had a 12 year old who's owners was emigrating, I Can understand them not wanting to put her through the travel and quarantine to go frm teh UK to Australia, but what really gets me is the 'if i can't find a home, I will have to have him/her pts, i dont want to, but can't see an alternative', emotional blackmail is a very hard part of the job.

I'd tell my to-be husband to get used to my kitty 'cos she ain't goin' no where!