I need some cheering up.

I have been having a crisis of anxiety / panic for well over a week now. I thought it was almost over for a while, but it's not.

I'm going for blood tests in about a week, then meeting with my doctor the following week. Until then, nothing to do but wait, endure and try to get over it on my own.

I just wish I could go outside for a walk, run a little, maybe ride my bike... without risking a panic attack as soon as my heart skips a beat.
I feel trapped.
I also feel very lonely and I have no one to turn to. This whole thing is starting to lead to depression. I can see myself getting worst and I hate it.

I wouldn't feel so bad if I didn't know that I have to look for a job. I've been out of school for almost a month now, I need to stop being lazy. Plus once that problem is solved, that will be one source of stress gone.

So I am trying to stay positive. Somehow. I don't know really what I need... anything but what I'm feeling right now would be a nice change. So I am just trying to find good things about my life right now.

On my fridge is a drawing made by my nephew. A portrait of me and him. It reminds me of all the creatures we saw in his pool that day (fish, whales, monkeys and tigers to name a few ) all of which flew away, somehow. And I remember having to hold him very close to make sure he didn't fall in the pool. I could have stayed like that for hours.

And Joshua has been such a love-bug these days. Almost as much as Kinah.

They seem to be such happy cats. Makes me feel good to think that I can make them happy.

And I have you guys. It's good to be able to come here and vent.


So I don't know really where I'm going with this. I think I just needed to write this down.

Thanks for putting up with me. I think I'm gonna go lie down for a bit.

You have a lot of stuff going on. You aren't alone as we are here for you.

You're at a major transitional period. School ending, needing to find a job. Just try to stay focused on the positives...your nephew, your kitties, anything else you can think of. Take a nice long bubble bath, or do something to relax yourself.

I really don't have any more advice for you, but remember that we are here for you if you need to talk. Hopefully, the doctor will be able to help.

How about a ??? That might calm you down a bit....

Just RELAX.....

Hey... I just noticed something in your post about your heart skipping a beat. I must have been missing that element of what's going on with you! If that feeling of heart arrhythmia is what's triggering your attacks, maybe this will help:

When you become aware of your heartbeat like that, stop what you're doing and wrap your arms around yourself, like hugging yourself... and hold your breath for ten seconds or so. Depending on what's causing the arrhythmia, that may kick you back into a normal rhythm.

I know it sounds strange -- but that's one of two or three techniques taught to me by a cardiologist many years ago, when I was diagnosed with Mitral Valve Prolapse, a very common deformity of a heart valve. The only other one I remember is running the sink full of cold water and sticking your face in it -- not very practical, but if the other one doesn't work, it might be worth a try.

I'm glad you're getting a good physical workup! And I'll be hoping for good news...

If it is getting too hard for you I would go to the ER and tell them that you have a doctors appointment in a week but its been very hard with the attacks lately... they can give you some xanax or klonopin to last you to your appointment. That will help calm you down a little. Hang in there.

Originally Posted by katachtig

You have a lot of stuff going on.

You aren't alone as we are here for you.

Click to expand...

Originally Posted by calico2222

You're at a major transitional period. School ending, needing to find a job. Just try to stay focused on the positives...your nephew, your kitties, anything else you can think of. Take a nice long bubble bath, or do something to relax yourself.

I really don't have any more advice for you, but remember that we are here for you if you need to talk. Hopefully, the doctor will be able to help.

Click to expand...

Thanks. I know I have been a little hard on myself lately. I haven't realized how difficult the changes in my life have been and I just expected myself to "snap out of it"

Originally Posted by neetanddave

How about a

??? That might calm you down a bit....

Just RELAX.....

Click to expand...

that's a solution. I'm not sure if it would work in the long term.

Originally Posted by CarolPetunia

Hey... I just noticed something in your post about your heart skipping a beat. I must have been missing that element of what's going on with you! If that feeling of heart arrhythmia is what's triggering your attacks, maybe this will help:

When you become aware of your heartbeat like that, stop what you're doing and wrap your arms around yourself, like hugging yourself... and hold your breath for ten seconds or so. Depending on what's causing the arrhythmia, that may kick you back into a normal rhythm.

I know it sounds strange -- but that's one of two or three techniques taught to me by a cardiologist many years ago, when I was diagnosed with Mitral Valve Prolapse, a very common deformity of a heart valve. The only other one I remember is running the sink full of cold water and sticking your face in it -- not very practical, but if the other one doesn't work, it might be worth a try.

I'm glad you're getting a good physical workup! And I'll be hoping for good news...

Click to expand...

That's interesting advice. But I don't think it's really caused by anything physical (I'll wait for the doctors appointment to confirm that).
It's not always a skipped beat... other times I feel like I have difficulty breathing, have tension, numbness or sometimes pain around my chest. There's no pattern really, except for the anxiety.

Originally Posted by Kaylacat

If it is getting too hard for you I would go to the ER and tell them that you have a doctors appointment in a week but its been very hard with the attacks lately... they can give you some xanax or klonopin to last you to your appointment. That will help calm you down a little.

Hang in there.

Click to expand...

Actually I don't have a regular doctor... I just went to see the drop-in doctor last time. If I don't feel better by Tuesday, I might just go back there.
The medication she gave me was just a temporary thing for the evening. It helps me sleep through the night, but it's no help during the day.


Anyways, I mostly wanted to say THANK YOU to everyone who has replied (here on in private). It means so much to know that there are people out there who care.

Anxiety and Panic attacks seem to be an almost normal thing these days experienced by woman (and maybe men, who don't readily admit to it). They're not a physical ailment exactly, but more of a physical reaction to a psychological reaction. I think the pressures in today's lifestyle are so immense, that we sometimes feel a loss of control because we don't know where to begin to gain control. In the case of a young woman, there's the pressures to have a great career, a bunch of kids, a great husband, a great house and keep all the relatives happy. It's alot to have on one's plate!

When you get overwhelmed by some or all of these pressures, you have an anxiety attack or constant feeling of anxiety that seems to come out of nowhere. I have at least 5 female friends who have suffered at one point or another from these anxiety problems, that can be debilitating.

Your goal should be not to let theses anxieties take over your life and prevent you from moving forward. Take on one or two goals at a time, even if they are small goals. When you are focused on a few goals and see them come to fruition, then you will gain confidence and be able to take on bigger goals. If you're not ready to tackle the big job world, start with some small things like an excersise routine, or a volunteer job, making a vegetable garden, planning an event for your friends or family. Most important, just get out in the world and do what feels comfortable. Don't get stuck cocooning at home as it won't go anywhere.

I would recommend doing some Yoga. This has taught me alot about deep breathing and relaxing. Don't just go to one class and one instructer. Go to a few. It's pretty easy, and you don't have to be a star athlete. If you can't afford the local gym, check your local paper. Some community centres and churches offer cheap or free sessions.

If you're feeling anxious, do deep breathing or stretches that make you feel in control of your bodies reactions to life.

Combatting anxiety is all about control, in my opinion. It starts by controlling your body, in a relaxation sense. Don't resort to alcohol to self-medicate, as this will only form a habit that isn't helpful in the long-run. Deep breath, yoga, get a massage, hang out with people or kids who relax you. Then when you're relaxed and focused, start making plans for yourself in regards to small goals, jobs, 5 year plans, education, etc.

A lot of friends have recommended this book/dvd/cd called The Secret. I haven't listened to it yet, but I get the jist that it's about getting yourself out there in the world which brings confidence. Maybe, something that may help you?!

If things worsen, I would definetly let a doctor know about what you are feeling and/or try to see what type of counselling is available to you at an affordable rate. Sometimes talking to a trained stranger can help sort out your thoughts, without feeling that you're burdening your friends. Plus you can be more honest.

I hope this helps .

Although I hope you know that no one here considers you a burden... you can unload on us anytime, and PMs are welcome, too.

I hope you feel better soon. I understand how stress can really get to you. Take some time to pamper yourself.

When I get sad I like to go window shopping at Target. I usually don't ever buy anything, but for some reason it makes me feel better to go and wander around....

Thanks again.

I feel better this morning. I did almost an hour of meditation last night and it helped calm me down. I slept well and didn't feel the need to sleep in too late... so that's a good sign.

I'll just wait and see how the rest of the day goes.

I have been thinking of planting a vegetable garden on my balcony. I know a guy who knows a lot about urban gardening, so I'll ask him for advice. (talking to people also helps me. even if it's just about gardening)

I have no advice, just lots of hugs for ya

Originally Posted by Trouts mom

I have no advice, just lots of hugs for ya

Click to expand...

We are all here for you!

I know how you feel. The only advice I have is to just try to take things one day at a time. I hope you feel better soon.

Does your school offer some sort of counseling? Perhaps seeing someone there would help a little.

It does stink too that all you want to do is go for a walk to burn off steam, but the anxiety gets in the way. When I went through my spells I couldn't exercise for 5 months just because it hurt to.

Hopefully you feel better soon. Try doing some things for yourself, like getting a manicure and/or a pedicure. For some reason whenever I get a pedicure I feel super. I guess the massaging of the feet helps!

No extra advice for you here - everyone has some great advice. But my heart goes out to you and I am here if you need to talk.