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So mad right now

post #1 of 14
Thread Starter 
My sister and her husband were fighting and she tried to leave and he took her keys shoved her to the ground with my niece in her arms. And then locked her out of the house. And I really don't know if he locked Kaylee out too but I don't really care. My sister may be alot of things but she is still my sister and dad said well she has been going too much lately. Who cares all she does is buisness and visit her family. And even if she did go to much she is an adult they have seperate vehicles. and otherwise she would be stuck at the house all of the time. she babysits so they have extra money and then he wants to act like this. And he got mad cause dad asked him before this to pick up a filter for the backhoe and dad didn't tell him to pay for it he was supposed to charge it and he went off on my sister about that and my dad has loaned him $1000s of dollars even helped him settle his divorce with his first wife. And then he wants to act like this. Let him hit my sister and see what happens. I'll make a new drive way with him that's my baby sister. How dare he put his hands on her especially infront of my niece.
post #2 of 14
I'm sorry he is such a _______. No one deserves to be hit.I don't care who you are.
I hope the baby is ok and so is your Sister.
post #3 of 14
That's terrible! This makes me and I don't even know your sister. He's got some nerve to do something like this after everything your family has done for him. I hope he gets what he deserves.
post #4 of 14
I know exactly what your going through. When my mom was with her second husband... He was really mean, and beat her all the time. It really hurts to see a loved one be hurt over and over and over. if you ever need someone to talk to that can somewhat relate to this... just PM me Tell her she can do MUCH better. He should love and respect her no matter what

How dare him
post #5 of 14
Did your sister file a police report? Even if she doesn't want to press charges right now, she should file the report... so it's on the record if she needs substantiation later on. She owes that protection to her daughter.
post #6 of 14
Your sister needs to leave. He's an abuser. You don't need to be "hit" in order to be in an abusive relationship. He shoved her to the ground and that's abuse. The fact that he gets upset when she goes out, is a huge indicator that he is an abuser. An abuser wants to keep is partner tied to the house and away from everyone: isolated.

She probably won't leave him over this instance (unfortunately). She will forgive him and chaulk it up to stress and stuff on his part. She will justify his behaviour, and already probably does by making all kinds of excuses for the mean things he does.

The worse thing you can do right now is to bad mouth him to her. Yes, he is an &%$@#%, but he is also your sister's husband and she won't tolerate anyone bad mouthing the "man" that she "loves". All that will do is isolate her more because she will start to pull away from you and not bother to tell you things going on with her. Be there for your sister, and support her and let her know that you are there for her...always. This way if she needs a safe haven to run to, she knows she can come to you.
post #7 of 14
Thread Starter 
Well I have calmed down a bit I actually kept my cool and simply listened to what my sister had to say. But I hate this my baby sister called me crying. And it was all cause she was not wanting to stay home cause she had errands to run. And to beat it all today is her birthday. I know my sister isn't an angel but that does not justify her being treated this way. And the temptation to beat him to a pulp is pretty big. She was soo happy too or so it seemed but she had been making odd little comments for some time now after they got married. Like I said something about meeting them for cards or something and she made a comment that I didn't want him there. And someone said how cute he was and she said you can have him but I just played it off as joking. Now I wonder if maybe he has been verbally abusive and she was too proud to say it. I just can't forgive him doing that no matter what his reason was. And what's worse when the cops questioned him he said he didn't even know anything happened. But the sheriff made him leave.
post #8 of 14
How could he! Your poor sister and what your niece must think. Hopefully she gets out of the situation.
post #9 of 14
to you, your sister and your niece.

I honestly don't know what I'd do to someone who hurt my baby sister, but it wouldn't be pretty and it certainly wouldn't be legal. (Not that I'm advocating you take the same route -- absolutely not! -- just that I'm not very good at handling my sister's pain.)

Natalie's advice is great, btw. I've been in an abusive relationship, so if you need to talk, feel free to PM me.
post #10 of 14
I would work to get her out of that situation. Your sister deserves better, especially her daughter...Thats no enviorment for a child. I hope things work out and she gets outta there....
post #11 of 14
Thread Starter 
My dad of all people is hoping they work stuff out and said well Terri shouldn't be going so much and he also stated that she should be cooking and cleaning more and that she probably just tripped. I can't believe this why do men make excuses for this. Or actually I should same some men. Dad likes Billy and thinks he's a fine man. Well I did uptil he pushed my sister and my good thoughts on him went to the ground when she did. And what's worse he took my niece inside afterwards took her keys and liscences plate and locked her outside of the house. And then dad makes excuses for him. But in the same breath he says he shouldn't have done all of that. Apparently according to my aunt they had already been fighting yesterday and that's why she left the first time she went to my aunts house to cool off and then came by here and dad asked her to pick up some filters and when she went home she started to go get them and he told her no that he didn't want to go anywhere and he wanted her there with him and they got into it and that's when he took her keys and pushed her to the ground and then took my niece inside. And my niece is a momma's girl so I know she must have been upset and for him to snatch her away like that and then to lock my baby sister outside. He better hope that none of my family gets ahold of him. Tough women abusers are never so tough when they have their own match standing upto them.
post #12 of 14

CALL THE POLICE! No man should ever put his hands upon a woman, no matter what their relationship. This man is an abuser and if she doesn't put a stop to it now, it'll get worse. And, who knows, if he's abusing your sister...(I hate to say this) he may begin to abuse your niece. I hope not, but be safe, not sorry.
post #13 of 14
One of the best things you could do is offer for them to stay with you, even just for a weekend. When I finally left my abusive ex, I called my sister at 3 am crying sitting in the bathtub... she came and picked me up the next day, and without her I never could have left him. I was only gone for a weekend, but it gave me enough space to have a clear head about him.
post #14 of 14
Thread Starter 
Well she took him back apparently he went home yesterday and they worked things out. I can't believe this is my sister putting up with this. Cause she has never been one to put up with this kind of treatment. And so the only thing I know to do is sit and wait and be here in case she needs me.
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