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Baby advice

post #1 of 10
Thread Starter 
I see that many of you are mothers and I need some advice. Ariana is 9 weeks old and pretty even tempered. Except when it comes to going to sleep. She never wants to sleep when shes with me. I asked her Granny Betty how she gets her to sleep and she says she just lays her in the basinette and she fusses a little then goes to sleep. When I try to do that she screams. Granny Betty says let her sream till she passes out. Is that ok to do? She will stop brething when she starts screaming.
post #2 of 10
When you put her in her bed for the night, kiss her and everything, then tell her goodnight, go to sleep now, etc. Leave the room. When she starts fussing, go in and check on her but DON'T PICK HER UP. Comfort her, tell her you are here if she needs you, but you aren't going to pick her up because it's time to go to sleep in her bed. You can touch her, and console her, but don't pick her up. Go in as often as needed to reassure her.

You'll be letting her know you are there, but it's O.K. to go to sleep by herself. It works!

Good luck, and congratulations on your little one!

p.s. When my little one was that small, I'd pick her up and let her fall asleep in my arms (or nursing). But after a few months, we used the technique above and it worked after about two nights. But when she was so tiny, I had to pick her up.
post #3 of 10
Oh sweetie, this brought back memories!!!
I started doing this with mine when they came home from the Hospital.
Feed and burp her.Change her and cuddle with her for a few minutes.When she gets groggy, place her in her bed and slowly rub her back if she starts to fuss.Talk to her softly and wait until she calms down and walk out.If she wakes again, repeat the process and she will know that it is time to sleep.
(A life saver for us was the Mommy Bear.It is the heartbeat bear..............it soothed mine more)
post #4 of 10
My baby girl is turning 27 in a couple weeks, but my family doctor told us it is impossible to spoil a baby as you are building security when you hold them (note I said baby, not toddler). I never let our daughter cry. I would let her fall asleep in my arms and transfer her to bed or as the above poster said, I would stand by the crib and touch her and talk to her. My good old-fashioned GP told me that in his opinion that made for a child and later an adult that had a good sense of self-worth and confidence in themselves. It has turned out to be true for our daughter. She was never jealous of my attention to any other child or living thing - she was very secure in our love for her.

I've also heard (don't know how accurate it is), that if you let baby boys cry too long and hard they can get a hernia.
post #5 of 10
iA with Yosemite.
I breast fed both of my girls and they fell asleep eating, then i would put them down. I do not think you can spoil a 9 week old baby. (I had to double check your post; 9 months old I would be saying something different.) A 9 weeks old baby, to me still needs to be held. Think about it, it wasn't that long ago to the baby that she was nice and warm in her moms belly! Now she's in the cold cruel world.
Maybe try to swaddle her real good and she will be comforted.
post #6 of 10
Thread Starter 
Thanks everyone. Ari is not a normal 9 week old. LOL She does not like to be swaddled at all. It makes her mad. She screams and tries her best to escape any way possible. LOL Im a bad mommy and her sleeping schedule doesnt come after eating. She usually stays up talking and wiggling for an hour and a half after eating. Then she gets sleepy but never actually wants to go to sleep. She always fights it. I worry its because shes used to her Granny Betty and not me. I feel like shes more confortable with her then me.
post #7 of 10
They just had a routine, and you will find one for the 2 of you, too . Our daughter was difficult to get to go to sleep and put down still asleep , but we finally got it sorted- a few months later . Then she decided that she didn't want rocked to sleep, or held while she fell asleep- she wanted to be put down and left alone when she was ready to fall asleep (at about 6 months), so baby's patterns change, too . At that age, if she's crying, I'd pick her up and hold her/rock her. What I read when my DD was at that age, was that it would reassure them that you were there if they needed you (a security thing), and it was when they were older that you could start teaching them to fall asleep on their own. Also, you will know (if you don't already ) the difference between a "need mommy/daddy" cry, a "something is wrong/hungry" cry, and a cry "just because" . Hang in there!
post #8 of 10
I know drs say its bad to let a baby sleep on its belly but both of my girls refused to sleep unless they were with me or on their bellies. When Katy got older I used the "let em scream" method because she refused to stop sleeping with me, Maddi however started sleeping by herself at 4 mths. Both girls were sleeping through the night at exactly one month old. I got lucky with that one.
If you have a bassinet move it into your room and try letting her sleep on her belly but remove anything in there that isnt needed. Like extra bedding and stuff. My room used to be warm enough that they would be able to sleep without a blanket so I didnt worry out the wazoo about them suffocating in their sleep. Granted I was still up checking them all the time. If not try snuggling her up and just singing to her. Maybe a rocking chair or recliner would help...I hope she starts to sleep better for you...
post #9 of 10
New research shows just how damaging it can be for babies to be left to cry (promotes feeling of abandonment, raises stress hormones which can impede brain development etc). Could you imagine being a helpless little baby, needing something (and yes, emotional NEEDS count too!) and the person you trust to meet your needs ignores you?

I have found www.mothering.com and www.askdrsears.com to be excellent resources and highly recommend you have a look. The Dr Sears website has a specific section on sleep.

Babywearing can be a really useful way for baby to feel safe, secure, and close to mom, and they can nap there while you go about your daily tasks.

I personally advocate co-sleeping, as I've found it so much easier to meet baby's needs without having to get up. Even now I can parent my 3 year old during the night without fully waking.

Babies have emotional needs too, just like adults, and it's perfectly normal for them to want to be close to mom, especially during sleep, which is a vulnerable state. Remember, a met need goes away.

The above response is from my sister, who has a 3 year old son and lots of cats.
post #10 of 10
Thread Starter 
Thanks everyone. Ari wont sleep on her back either. But I did talk to the doctor about it and she said as long as I check on her often that its ok to let her sleep on her belly. I dont put anything in her crib. Im to afraid to sleep with her. Im a very heavy sleeper.
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