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Do you ever feel like a rubber band?

post #1 of 6
Thread Starter 
Like your being pulled in several directions all at once?

I have been feeling like that myself. Lately all of my freinds have been available and want to see me so I am out almost every night. Not complaining because I love seeing them but I am not getting anything done. My house in a wreck I havn't had time to buy groceries in 2 weeks and I'm exhausted.

My one freind Laura just went through major brain surgery and visiting her is one of my major priorities because engageing her in conversation and logic games is helping her recover.

My Friend Corinne is training for a marathon and I am her gym buddy we also are girl guide leaders together so that takes up at least one night a week Also she and I are both HUGE Ottawa Senator's (Hockey) fans and watch the game together.

I feel like I'm neglecting some freinds and am bing monopolized by others. I am also one of those people who can't say no. So I feel guilty if there is no time in the week to at least call some of my other friends.

Does anyone else feel like they need a clone or two just to get by?
post #2 of 6
I know exactly how you feel! This summer will likely be one of the craziest summers of my life (actually, next summer probably won't be any saner ... I'm getting married in August 2008!). J's sister is getting married in July and I'm one of her bridesmaids, so I've got engagement parties, the stag and doe, the bridal shower, the bachelorette party, dress fittings ... Another pair of friends are getting married later in the summer, which means more parties and obligations. Other friends are having a baby. I know I'm forgetting something ...

I'm at the point now, where if someone invites me to some new event, I feel like throttling them instead of graciously accepting and being happy to have a life. On Friday, we were at J's sister's stag-and-doe, and one of J's old high school friends came by and mentioned that his little sister (another of J's friends) is getting married soon, too, so J bought stag-and-doe tickets for that. I nearly killed J then and there, but fortunately we're not actually planning on attending the party; he just bought tickets because he felt obligated to do so (since the friend and his sister were both at J's sister's stag-and-doe).

I know it's great to have a life and all, but I'd really like to just crawl into bed for a month or so.
post #3 of 6
I feel like that almost all the time.

I've always been "the strong one" because of the way that I've been able to manage crisis. So it seems sometimes that people are literally pulling me to pieces because the NEED something from me, and sometimes I want to be the needy one and just fall apart and have other people help me instead of the other way around.

Additionally, because I have done a lot of volunteer organizing - special events, fundraising, etc., I am constantly being asked to give of myself and my time.

I'm tired of it, and after spending the last 6 years giving, giving, giving, I've decided to be more of a hermit this year and just spend time with my furbabies and MYSELF.

You have to learn to say NO without feeling guilty because you are needing to take care of yourself. It took me a while, but I've done enough good that I CAN say no, and not beat myself up for it.
post #4 of 6
Aw, sending you good thoughts and hugs...

For practicing "no" you might try to do it with just one friend, for starters. Make an agreement that you can say no to each other whenever you need to, with no hard feelings. Once you can start saying it to one friend, it will be easier to say no to others.

"No" is a very important word! Hope it's all better soon.
post #5 of 6
While it is a very unselfish and good thing to stand by all your friends when they need help, you cannot ignore your own needs and health. Sometimes you have to say no, and that there are others things that are just as important to be tended to
post #6 of 6
Yes, with what I have been through with the kids.
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