I totally agree with you!
Merlynn, my crazy tabby female, came to me at 8 weeks (she was a stray). From that time, I brushed her teeth and would clip her nails. She got so used to me doing these things (I do them in the bathroom so I can close the door and she can't get away), that as soon as the bathroom door would open, she'd jump on top of the closed toilet seat and wait for her yummy treat at the end of her teeth brushing.
Now, don't even think about clipping this little one's nails.
Woo wee. She goes nuts.
Brushing her teeth, she'll still tolerate, but something about getting her nails clipped sends her through a loop. She'll claw her way up my neck and wriggle around until I just let her go b/c it's too traumatic for me and for her. Who wants that?
So there is a cat's only boarding "resort" (I call it that b/c that's what it is to me
) that I take both of my cats to so I can get their nails clipped. They are sooo sweet there and only charge $5 per cat. It's easier and way less traumatic. And I walk away with happy kitties.
You're not a failure as a meowmy...these kids just know what to do to get their way. So we have to outsmart them to get our way...their nails have to be clipped, so someone else can be the "bad guy."
PS I've taken them to the vet to have their nails clipped while they are there on a regular visit and it's not worth it b/c they charge $10 per cat and don't do any better of a job than the boarding resort.