Tigger, I feel for you, and I know exactly what you are going through. If you decide to go through credit counceling, be sure to really research the company you are using. Many of them are "not-for-profit" but are linked up with a for profit loan company (the once you make 6 months of payments you can get a loan type thing, only they will charge you a lot of interest). Also, it can look bad on the credit report. Some creditors look at it as you couldn't handle your problems yourself. Another thing is that if you are current on your credit cards many of them won't help you. You have to be at least 2 months behind, and credit cards are the ONLY thing they will work with. Your utility bills, mortgage and other monthly incurred bills won't be affected at all.
What it takes to really get yourself out of that situation is to make changes to your lifestyle. I went through bankruptcy, got rid of $50,000 in debt (I was REALLY BAD!), and we are still in a hand-to-mouth existence. Mostly because I am trying to pay everything on a single income, but that's a different thread.
We are making it work as best we can, even with much less income. We don't eat out, except maybe
once a month. We don't do fast food. I work close enough to home to go home for lunch, but if I didn't I would be brown bagging it. Just cutting out eating out and fast food has saved us literally hundreds per month. We pretty much shop only for things we really need. We don't buy frivolous things anymore - both of us gave up our collecting (Star Wars for him, Barbies for me, DVDs for both). We can actually go to a mall now and not come out spending $100 or more. We can't, and we both know it.
It is tough to say no to things you want and want to do, but you have to make the change if you ever want to get out of this cycle.