Father in law wants to put down his cats

Hey everyone,

I'm not sure if this is the forum I should be posting this in, but I am desparate for advice. My father in law is seriously considering putting down his 2 cats. His wife, my MIL, passed away on April 3rd. The cats ere more hers then his. He has been having a really tough time dealing with her seath. He is trying to get rid of everything that remind him of her; clothes, books, cds, knickknacks, etc. He is now saying that the cats are too much work. The older cat Muffin is about 8 years old and over weight. Other then that she is a sweet kitty, who is just not fond of kids. The younger cat, Rascal has FIV and has been steadily getting worse. I have suggested that he put up a notice on the board at the senior's apartment he lives at to find a new home for Muffin - she would be minimal work for a senior and great company. I suggested he talk to the vet about Rascal. He doesn't want to do either of those things.

Do you have any suggestions? My M-I-L loved those cats so much, it would be a shame to put either of them down. Unfortunately, we just don't have room for any more cats and both Muffin and Rascal get aggressive toward kids (hissing, spitting, etc).

Thanks

I know that you can't give the cats a home, but can you give them a place to stay until they find a new one, a spare bedroom even? Maybe not, but it's something to think about.

I can kind of understand his sentiment, especially if he never really liked cats to begin with (I mean... nobody's perfect right )

There are also no-kill shelters, depending on where you are there are ones who are fully able to take on FIV+ cats.

You are probably going to have to take responsibility for them somehow though, or he will just go ahead and have them put down. It sounds like he has become very depressed since his wife's death, and it might be a relief if you just take them.

We have very limited space right now and no where to put the cats. I am working on my sister in law because she has said in the past she would take them, now she is backing out. He has always liked the cats, but since his wife's death, has had a turn around in attitude about them. I keep telling him that if he does something drastic he will regret it, that they are still a wonderful connection to her, but he is still adament about getting rid of them. I think someone in his building would enjoy getting a cat, Muffin would be great for a senior!

I am sending hugs and prayers that your father in law comes to his senses a little.

Could you contact any no kill shelters in your area and get advice from them about the situation? They may even take them. Would he be prepared to keep them until an alternative solution is found? I do feel for him deeply, he has suffered a terrible loss. Yet I really do feel that these two little cats should not have to suffer for it. You are in a difficult situation here too, all I can say is as above, try to contact no kill shelters. I wish you all the best

Greif can sometimes make a person loose sense of whats real and what isnt. He could just veiw the cats as mere objects ( putting to death an innosent creature doesnt seem smart to me, it would be different if they had very serious issues and maybe in his eyes they do, you said one of the cats was FlV postive) Or it could be they are reminders that stur up painful memories. Either way you need to get the cats out of their ASAP!!

You or your father in law could contact some of the local nursing homes and ask them if they're intrested in adopting one or two cats. The cats are probably grieving also, so maybe that's why his attitude toward them has changed???

I am working on it. I have put up a notice in his senior's apartment and I will be calling a few no-kill shelters today. I just hope he doesn't do anything while I am trying to find them new homes. I think I have him convinced to wait a while. I am trying!

Good luck with it all, It sounds like you are doing the best that you can. It is a difficult situation but the poor little kitties! I wish you all the best. Let us know what you manage to do