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Rumors: VT shooter's father commits sucide

post #1 of 37
4/18/07 at 10:45am
Thread Starter 
http://www.netscape.com/viewstory/20...tml&frame=true

I was unsure if I should post this here but I decided to. The father committed sucide when it was released that his son was the shooter. The mother tried and did not suceed and is in critical condtion.

And this may not be a popular opinion. But I feel really bad for the boys parents. This news must have been so hard on them. That family plus the family of everyone else will be in my thoughts.
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post #2 of 37
4/18/07 at 10:48am
Thats just heartbreakingly sad
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post #3 of 37
4/18/07 at 10:52am
You have to feel for them. Living with the horror of losing a child is bad enough, but all the media camped outside and the questions? No idea how you would ever get away from that pressure....
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post #4 of 37
4/18/07 at 10:57am
Can't say as I blame them. I feel so sorry for the parents of the victims, but it must be even worse to be the parents of the killer and know that your child was responsible for so much death.
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post #5 of 37
4/18/07 at 10:58am
I hate to say this with all the happened but that articel seemed pretty vague about his parents and I can't find anything else to confirm it.

I do feel for ALL the parents, students, faculty and anyone else involved in this tragedy.
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post #6 of 37
4/18/07 at 11:03am
Quote:
Originally Posted by twstychik View Post
I hate to say this with all the happened but that articel seemed pretty vague about his parents and I can't find anything else to confirm it.

I do feel for ALL the parents, students, faculty and anyone else involved in this tragedy.
Not seen any similar articles elsewhere and I've seen a couple stating that the family had been under seige from the press
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post #7 of 37
4/18/07 at 11:08am
I know what that's like - imagine coming home from work to hear from your neighbor that FOX news had spent the day camped out on your front porch, or getting a knock on the door while you are coolking supper to find a different news crew in your back hallway with cameras rolling and a mic in your face,

Or your unlisted phone number ringing off the hook for hours because news programs - including Inside Edition, The Maury show, and 20/20 - are trying to reach you for interviews.

I went through all that after my daughter was attacked, and it can in some cases almost - ALMOST - feel as horrific as the tragedy that has occured.

At the LEAST, it is a huge violation of your privacy.

My heart goes out to anyone who is involved in the V.T. shooting case.
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post #8 of 37
4/18/07 at 11:10am
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by twstychik View Post
I hate to say this with all the happened but that articel seemed pretty vague about his parents and I can't find anything else to confirm it.

I do feel for ALL the parents, students, faculty and anyone else involved in this tragedy.
I have not looked else where yet to see if there was anymore info. I just happened to run across that article. If I find or see anything else I will update.
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post #9 of 37
4/18/07 at 11:17am
Thread Starter 
Ok doing some searching (should have done that before I posted) but it seems that it is not true that the parents committed suicide. I think I learned a lesson about checking facts before I post. Sorry everyone.
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post #10 of 37
4/18/07 at 11:26am
One of the Columbine killers' parent moved out of the area to escape the pressure. I honestly don't know how the other family stayed, especially with pictures of their homes plastered everywhere.

I'm not particularly surprised if it is true. The press are vultures, especially with something like this. They want someone to blame. The parents are the most opportune target. They would be ruthless.

I'm not well read on South Korean culture, but I know in many Asian cultures honor and family are supremely important. The shooter dishonored his family, brought extreme shame to their house. I do feel for them. No matter how troubled your child is, you would never think it possible for them to do something like this.
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post #11 of 37
4/18/07 at 11:44am
Well, I'm definately glad to hear it isn't true. I could see it happening though, with an Asian family. But I hope they realize that there is probably very little they could have done to have stopped their son from doing what he did - a lot of us look back on this situation and say "What if this had happened, maybe someone should have noticed, look at all this evidence!" but really, would we have done anything different? Hindsight, unfortunately, is perfect, and its easy to place blame. Its such a sad situation.
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post #12 of 37
4/18/07 at 11:48am
Quote:
Originally Posted by valanhb View Post
I'm not well read on South Korean culture, but I know in many Asian cultures honor and family are supremely important. The shooter dishonored his family, brought extreme shame to their house. I do feel for them. No matter how troubled your child is, you would never think it possible for them to do something like this.
I'm not either (regardng South Korean culture), but even if the dishonor does happen, most Asian cultures view suicide as the worst you could do to yourself. I think Samurais were the only people allowed to sacrifice themselves but that was more for country or failure for their country.
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post #13 of 37
4/18/07 at 4:41pm
I would like to know more about his parents. very little has been said and I have had cnn on for over an hour. I heard a report on the radio, that they tried to get him mental health treatment, but missed the rest of the story.

they must be out of their minds with this.
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post #14 of 37
4/18/07 at 4:55pm
where on earth did that site get the information for that article from?

Ping I can understand you seeing that article, believing it and posting it here - so dont feel bad.

Interesting lesson that all on the net is not true!
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post #15 of 37
4/18/07 at 7:57pm
When I was at Kent State, a man killed his girlfriend and her child, and then took shelter in a student's apartment keeping her hostage for hours and then he killed her.

During the trial, his parents were pretty much tortured. Their house was spray-painted with obscenities, etc.

Just as children aren't responsible for the sins of their fathers, neither are parents for their children, especially children who are in their 20s. Maybe they tried to help him just as others did... at a certain point there really isn't anything else you can do.
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post #16 of 37
4/19/07 at 3:09am
Thread Starter 
The paper the article came from is The Chosun Iib newspaper. It appears we are reading the English version of possibly a Korean paper.
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post #17 of 37
4/19/07 at 12:03pm
There was, absolutely, no way that his parents did not know how mentally ill he was, no way.
Whether they tried to get help for him is a good question.
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post #18 of 37
4/19/07 at 12:11pm
Its untrue! People commented on your posted link and have links confirming this is rumor and not true!
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post #19 of 37
4/19/07 at 12:15pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by trixie23 View Post
Its untrue! People commented on your posted link and have links confirming this is rumor and not true!
She knows - look at post #9. She posted in good faith though.
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post #20 of 37
4/19/07 at 12:18pm
I wasn't knocking her for posting just stating it wasn't true! Forgive me I missed post #9! It wasn't a defensive remark!
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post #21 of 37
4/19/07 at 12:53pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by trixie23 View Post
I wasn't knocking her for posting just stating it wasn't true! Forgive me I missed post #9! It wasn't a defensive remark!
I wasn't knocking you either - just letting you know.
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post #22 of 37
4/19/07 at 12:57pm
Ok all is well don't want you to think my writing is snotty! Your allowed to bust me out for overlooking the already stated obvious! A duh on my part
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post #23 of 37
4/19/07 at 1:15pm
LOL! Before I read the entire thread, I sent the link to the news article to my husband! ooops. Guess I have to retract it now.
I feel sorry for the shooter, too...To the extent to where he was in THAT much pain and was THAT dilusional that he felt he had to do what he did. That is just really sad. It surely doesn't EXCUSE him from what he did...don't get me wrong...but it has got to be horrible to feel the way he did.
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post #24 of 37
4/19/07 at 1:40pm
People are abused, raped, betrayed, homeless, disregarded and go through more in life than this boy did! Sure I don't know his whole life story but everyone gets teased! Ive been through crazy s*** in my life and I would never punish innocent society for my delusional bs! I see you have a kind heart but what he did is unacceptable! It was an attention seeking act that caused lives including his own... IMO he should have just killed himself and let the innocent - by standers live! That's like saying Columbine was acceptable as well! There are far worse things in life vs being teased! Think about this... How would we feel if one of our children was a bully and in return his life was takin? Sure he would be wrong for being a bully but is it the victims right to decide that persons fate? No... karma will take care of that! BTW this is just my opinion not a personal attack! I wish I could be as forgiving!
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post #25 of 37
4/19/07 at 1:53pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by trixie23 View Post
People are abused, raped, betrayed, homeless, disregarded and go through more in life than this boy did! Sure I don't know his whole life story but everyone gets teased! Ive been through crazy s*** in my life and I would never punish innocent society for my delusional bs! I see you have a kind heart but what he did is unacceptable! It was an attention seeking act that caused lives including his own... IMO he should have just killed himself and let the innocent - by standers live! That's like saying Columbine was acceptable as well! There are far worse things in life vs being teased! Think about this... How would we feel if one of our children was a bully and in return his life was takin? Sure he would be wrong for being a bully but is it the victims right to decide that persons fate? No... karma will take care of that! BTW this is just my opinion not a personal attack! I wish I could be as forgiving!
I know what you mean. He didn't just "snap" either. This was cold, calculated, intentional mass MURDER. I do feel sorry for his parents and any other family he may have though.
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post #26 of 37
4/19/07 at 1:54pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by ckblv View Post
There was, absolutely, no way that his parents did not know how mentally ill he was, no way.
Whether they tried to get help for him is a good question.
he had to get helped, but he didnt even live with his parents and such, and it isnt uncommon for parents not to know depression or any other mental illness, thats why often it goes untreated. He had to see someone due to the school making him because of all the stories he wrote in english it was just WOW! He also didnt go into detail with all of his problems when he did see someone, and that to isnt uncommon! He had the chance to get help and he didnt! U really cant say it was anyones elses fault other than his! But can u just imagine how the parents are feeling right now! The school had him get help or he wasnt allowed back in school, now someone talked and said they seen him and he didnt say how sick he really was and such and there was no real way to treat that if someone doesnt want to be treated! (BTW this isnt an attack , its hard to understand mental illnesses and such, but both of my brothers suffer from it the one more than the other and so me and my mom have done ALOT of research and it also took many years to find the right "meds" and such)
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post #27 of 37
4/19/07 at 2:01pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by ProudKittieMom View Post
he had to get helped, but he didnt even live with his parents and such, and it isnt uncommon for parents not to know depression or any other mental illness, thats why often it goes untreated. He had to see someone due to the school making him because of all the stories he wrote in english it was just WOW! He also didnt go into detail with all of his problems when he did see someone, and that to isnt uncommon! He had the chance to get help and he didnt! U really cant say it was anyones elses fault other than his! But can u just imagine how the parents are feeling right now! The school had him get help or he wasnt allowed back in school, now someone talked and said they seen him and he didnt say how sick he really was and such and there was no real way to treat that if someone doesnt want to be treated! (BTW this isnt an attack , its hard to understand mental illnesses and such, but both of my brothers suffer from it the one more than the other and so me and my mom have done ALOT of research and it also took many years to find the right "meds" and such)
I understand mental illness... You have great viewpoints! I do sympathize with his parents but him no! He's reaction was excessive and a mass murder! I have major sympathy for the victims families! We all have our demons and we have all done wrong... It's a dog eat dog world out there but words are just that... Words! Nothing worth dying for! He should have attempted to seek help, there had to be slight signs of his personal disturbance if a psychotherapist gave any analysis! I cannot empathize with him... I can empathize with anyones pain but not when it physically takes the life of another... In this case many!
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post #28 of 37
4/19/07 at 2:08pm
I don't feel anything for the shooter. I mean, yes, I'm sure he did have problems, and maybe he couldn't help fantasizing about violence. But. He planned for AT LEAST a month to do this. And he carried his plan out. People who are so mentally ill that it would make them unaware that that was wrong would never in a billion years have been able to get through college. Or even a single day without lots of help and meds.

He was responsible for this. It is harder for us to deal with the fact that there are people out there who are actually this bad and evil and mean but there are. The fact that he killed himself after is enough for me, that he knew he would not be able to live with the punishment or the emotions afterwards.

A truly insane person (and less severe mental illness may excuse you from say, simple assault or being rude or weird. But not massacring your classmates) would not have been able to do this. Only someone who was disturbed but mentally clear could have done this.

I agree with you trixie. And college students for the most part don't engage in the same sort of direct teasing and such as children. He may have felt socially slighted, but nobody was tying his shoelaces together or taunting him. There have been numerous interviews with people who tried to be at least acquaintances with him. He creeped them all out.
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post #29 of 37
4/19/07 at 2:10pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by trixie23 View Post
I understand mental illness... You have great viewpoints! I do sympathize with his parents but him no! He's reaction was excessive and a mass murder! I have major sympathy for the victims families! We all have our demons and we have all done wrong... It's a dog eat dog world out there but words are just that... Words! Nothing worth dying for! He should have attempted to seek help, there had to be slight signs of his personal disturbance if a psychotherapist gave any analysis! I cannot empathize with him... I can empathize with anyones pain but not when it physically takes the life of another... In this case many!
Ya I dont blame no one but him i guess i tend to ramble and my point gets mixed up somewhere lol but thats what i was trying to say, In a way I think more could have been done to prevent this and well like i said if someone doesnt wanna be help and they are that far out there then theres not much u can do, i just wish someone would have seen the warning signs more better and everything! And only if there was a way he could of went into a hospital out treatment isnt always the best u know ! O and his personal disturbance was in his writings, a few teachers didnt even want him in his class and such! I just wish someone would have been able to "commit" him and maybe none of this would have happened. And I dont empathize him at all, what he did well was HORRIBLE and unacceptable! I feel so sorry for the friends and families of all of the victims! And you are right it is a dog eat dog world out there This is just so horrible to even think that someone is capable of doing something like this!
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post #30 of 37
4/19/07 at 2:22pm
I agree! I know people suffer and I know some sickness is incurable! he should have been committed! His peers or authority (teachers) should have takin his writings serious and submitted proper action... I think he should have been institutionalized but what is done is done! I agree that word of mouth treatment wasn't an answer! I know his writings (havent heard them yet) may have been a cry for help simply brushed off... Which can cause an angry and aggressive reaction! I think the university didn't handle things properly IMO!
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