I think I met my first bridezilla!

lunasmom

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Last night we were at a friend's house celebrating her brithday. One of her friends is getting married this year.

The birthday girl is going to be a bridesmaid for the bride-to-be. Last night the bride-to-be gave the bridesmaid her packet of information which consisted of a folder with 3 page print outs and other information (i.e. the magnets with the wedding date etc).

anyways birthday girl was a little too partied to read it all, so she said she would read it later. Once the bride-to-be left for the night, the rest of us girls pounced on the folder looking to see what she was planning.

OK, the page print out was CRAZY! There was an entire section dedicated to what shoes the bridesmaids could wear. No open toe, too-high of heel or too low, and I forget the rest. Then....this was the best part. She typed "If you are unsure if the shoes will work for my wedding, please take a picture of them and send the picture to me. I will approve or disapprove of the shoes".

Then the other part about the bridesmaids dresses was pretty nuts too. Basically they can only buy them at 1 of 2 stores in the area...no where else. She's afraid that the color may be slightly off elsewhere and doesn't want that to ruin her wedding photos.

The second page consisted of "required" and "optional" places that the bridesmaids had to be (shower #1, shower #2, bachelorette party in Vegas, THE WEDDING).

The last page was a copy and paste of simple do's and don'ts for bridesmaids...like something you would see out of a magazine that some one didn't know. Like "Remember to smile at all times during the wedding." etc.

Can we say Psycho??
 

maddensmom

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Sounds like the wedding I was in last November!! I was the Maid-of-Honor
(Why? I still don't know!) She actually BOUGHT our shoes so they all would match and made us all have our hair done exactly the same way!! She even bought our jewelry, we couldn't wear anything that the other bridesmaids weren't wearing!! Sheesh!

Some people are nuts!
 
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lunasmom

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Oh yes!!!!

I forgot about the part for hair. Apparently they are allowed to go get it done on their own (day of the wedding) and she will provide photos of how the hair should be done. OOOOOORRRRRR they can just go with her. Hmmm...if she were that nuts, I'll just book the appointment at the same place that day.
 

ssmith0385

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Every wedding I have been in has had a required dress (ONE dress sold at ONE store) and shoes (ONE pair picked at ONE store). And usually the brides gave us matching jewelry as our bridesmaids gift at the bridesmaids luncheon so that we had matching jewelry. I guess all my friends are bridezillas LOL!!
 

maddensmom

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Originally Posted by lunasmom

Oh yes!!!!

I forgot about the part for hair. Apparently they are allowed to go get it done on their own (day of the wedding) and she will provide photos of how the hair should be done. OOOOOORRRRRR they can just go with her. Hmmm...if she were that nuts, I'll just book the appointment at the same place that day.
Yeah I know what you mean, we all had to go together to get ours done too....so she could approve!
I hated being in that wedding! My husband and her husband are best friends, but she and I aren't really all that close. I never understood why I was the Maid (or matron I guess) of honor in the first place. I was SO glad when it was over!


I wasn't the least bit like that with my wedding, so I don't understand girls like that!
 

reesespbc

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Wow... nuts. When all is said in done, you're not going to remember little mundane details like what shoes your bridesmaid's wore and anything like that. If someone isn't smiling in your picture, it's not the end of the world. My wife's grandfather wasn't even looking at the camera and had a scowl on his face. We laugh at it!


TWO showers? So people have to buy twice as many gifts or what is that about?
 

maddensmom

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Originally Posted by ReesesPBC

Wow... nuts. When all is said in done, you're not going to remember little mundane details like what shoes your bridesmaid's wore and anything like that. If someone isn't smiling in your picture, it's not the end of the world. My wife's grandfather wasn't even looking at the camera and had a scowl on his face. We laugh at it!


TWO showers? So people have to buy twice as many gifts or what is that about?
My MIL wasn't smiling in any of our pics either, but thats a whole other thread!
 

ilovesiamese

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I don't think that is too bad at all. As a friend, I would like to make sure my friends have the best possible wedding and if I didn't want that, then I wouldn't agree to be a bridesmaid. PLus some people honestly don't have know how things go because they haven't been apart of a wedding party before.


All my girls bought the same dress at the same store and wore the same shoes, had their hair done the same, and same jewelery. I also had two showers. One for my side of the family and one for Dh's side of the family because my parents, family, and friends live 7 hours from me and Dh's family and friends live 3 hours away.
 

carolpetunia

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It seems to me that the whole industry that has grown up around weddings is to blame for creating this absurd idea that the wedding should be a fabulous production, a Technicolor Cinemascope SurroundSound epic whose primary purpose is to impress everybody.

But once upon a time, wasn't the whole point of a wedding simply to bring your loved ones together to witness and share in the traditional rituals that celebrate your decision to commit your lives to one another? It's fine to make a wedding lovely, if you can afford it... as long as the trappings don't make you lose sight of the meaning of the thing.

If I ever get married again, though, I expect a huge crowd -- because it will be a certified MIRACLE!
 

scamperfarms

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eh i dont see the whole hoopla.

but your talking to someone who had one brides made.and a maid of honor..told them what color to wear..any style..any shade..and my maid of honor wore..those..crocs for her shoes..

So..lol
 

sarahp

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Golllyyyyy!!!! I let my bridesmaids choose whatever they wanted in the way of shoes and dress. I just wanted them in the same dress as each other, and similar colour shoes. So they went off together and got something they both liked that was comfortable. The dresses we paid for, the shoes they paid for, and ended up just getting the same shoes as each other to make it easier.

I told them to have their hair done however they wanted, and to wear whatever jewelry they wanted. If you can't trust your bridesmaids to make sensible decisions, they shouldn't be your bridesmaids.

They looked gorgeous, and honestly? They were a lot more stressed about it than I was


I don't understand bridezillas, the day is about fun and happiness, if you start ordering everyone around, it'll show and it won't be as fun!
 

bonnie1965

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Originally Posted by CarolPetunia

If I ever get married again, though, I expect a huge crowd -- because it will be a certified MIRACLE!
Same here
If I ever get married, everyone I have ever known will show up just to see it actually happen. If that amazing day ever comes, it will be in a park or the redwoods complete with picnic atmosphere. I am so not into the whole formal thing.

For those who are, it can be lovely. I just could never handle the stress or the financial aspect.

I was MoH twice (same friend) and she divorced both times
Caught bouquet both times, still single!
 

scamperfarms

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Originally Posted by Bonnie1965

Oh that's great!!
Yup. she was worried i would hate them. i said..Pfft wear whats comfortable. I dont care!

We got married on the top of a waterfall...and i didnt want her to slip..so that was a good choice for her
 

xxtashaxx

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when my SO cousion got married his niece was a bridesmaid , the bride to be even told her what nickers she HAD to wear. im getting married in july and i dont care what they turn up in , all i have said as long as its a lilic colour i dont mind what shade, they can have there hair as they like ( 2 are my girls so i chose there stuff lol) but my sister (maid of houner) is doing hers , her way. and iv not gone mad over any thing yet!!!!!! lol
 

gemlady

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the bride to be even told her what nickers she HAD to wear
That's a bridezilla!

Some uniformity is to be expected in the bridal party's clothing. Now if bride declared that all hair was to be dyed the same color, and everyone the same height, weight...

And dictating where the showers and other parties are to be held?


Check out www.etiquettehell.com for bridezilla and other stories. One bride even got huffy that one of her maids got pregnant and would be showing by the time of the wedding.
 

lookingglass

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Originally Posted by gemlady

That's a bridezilla!

Some uniformity is to be expected in the bridal party's clothing. Now if bride declared that all hair was to be dyed the same color, and everyone the same height, weight...

And dictating where the showers and other parties are to be held?


Check out www.etiquettehell.com for bridezilla and other stories. One bride even got huffy that one of her maids got pregnant and would be showing by the time of the wedding.
As I was planning my wedding (prior to our elopement) my SIL called me and said that she'd have to pull out of my wedding. I asked her why, and she said she was pregnant with my neice! I told her that I would have NO problems under the sun with her showing at my wedding. In fact, we'd pick out a wonderful dress to show off her belly.

Some women are scary when they get married.
 

epona

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Anything like that would drive me nuts! Our wedding was very informal, we specified no dress code, just wear what you usually feel comfy in, and most of our friends turned up in jeans. I had to make Nate take his baseball cap off for the legal necessities in the registry office (he threw it to the crowd as if it were a bouquet
)

We had to abandon the wedding picnic because of rain, so went to the pub, then Nate and most of our guests got lost on the way to the reception (I swear Nate could get lost on his way to the bathroom) and found themselves on the bus that goes the long way round with a bottle of tequila and a bottle of whiskey. Someone had a chopping board, limes, and salt and they all had tequila slammers on the bus. Later on we had a handfasting conducted by my brother which was fantastic we had our hands tied together and jumped a broomstick, and then a friend DJd for us at our local pub and we all got drunk.

No white dresses, no bridesmaids, no dressing up, no posh shoes, matching hair, etc. And we had a lovely and very memorable day. I really couldn't have done it any other way, it would really have driven me insane.
 
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lunasmom

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Yikes, OK I guess this person has a mild case.


Part of the reason for the drama I guess was that the bridesmaid really doesn't want to be a bridesmaid. Her husband and her were struggling for a long time and have been recovering from past bills for the last year.

To me it was the "send picture of shoes" bit that threw me and actually approving or disapproving. The way it was set up was more military then anything.

I guess, really, I'm glad that I've never had to be in a wedding party.
 
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