Study shows that Abstinence Only Sex Ed doesn't work... - Page 2

I thought that it was required here too. Well, that is, Pennsylvania.. I'm in DC now, and I don't know what the reqs are here as I didn't attend school here. I don't recall there being an opt out or parental permission thing for it .. it was just included in health class as a required part of the course.

Here's a question: Why are children not being taught that oral sex IS sex and that just because you are not doing something that could get you pregnant it does NOT mean that you aren't engaging in risky behavior?

I am proud to say that my daughter was taught BY ME everything that she needed to know and not only is she using birth control but she also uses condoms.

However, not that long ago Bill Clinton was saying that what he did with Monica wasn't "sex" and now studies are showing that children as young as 6th grade are having oral sex on a regular basis, but that since it isn't "intercourse" they don't consider it to be actual "sex."

People keep trying to simplify these issues and place blame everywhere but where it should lie: ON THE PARENTS. Parents who strongly objected to the schools offering sex ed and condoms because they decided that this would give their children free license when it came to sexual activity - as if it wouldn't happen ANYWAY!

Oh this whole subject just really pushes my buttons. Abstinance is an ideal, NOT a reality, and those who preach abstinance are NOT today's teenagers and obviously have no clue about the reality of today's adolescents and the pressure's they face.

My daughter is 10. about the age of 7 or 8 she started asking me questions starting with "mom whats this inder the bathroom sink?" we talked about it and i explained it to her. then the next year in school they had the "learning about your body" talk in gym where they seperated the boys and the girls and they each had their own time. then she came home and we talked about it some more. we went to the library and checked out some books and went through everything from A to Z (is there a Z? lol) any time she has a question she will leave me a note(if dads around) or ask if she can talk to me in her room. i am very honest with her and answer her questions very directly although finding the right words sometimes is very hard. i decided with that first question that i was not going to leave it up to the school or society to teach my daughter about this that if i really wanted her to be able to make responsible decisions that i was going to have to do it myself and not mask anything.

I also wanted to add that just because the school teaches sexual health, doesn't make it their 100 percent responsibility either. It is always the parents job to re-enforce whatever teachers are teaching at school in the home as well, not just sexual health.

Also, just because it is being taught at schools doesn't mean that parents can't teach their children, it is only a means to enhance education. I've learned that through doing research, it is never good to rely on only one source to get information, so I think learning in the home, at school, going to the doctor and reading is benefical to the child learning many different facts about sexual health and then another aspect is having to let that child take that information and make their own decisions (when they are adults) because we can't control what they'll do all the time, we can just try to prepare them as best as possible.

Generally, schools allow parents to opt their children out of certain things...biology dissections, the pledge of allegiance and comprehensive sex ed (which as multi-week "units" occurred in 5th, 7th and 10th grades) were the three my former school district allowed parents to have their say in. I got opted out of 2 of those...I'll give ya two guesses which but you'll only need one

My school district is in a rabidly conservative city, which is in a rabidly conservative county (DuPage, IL...second biggest donorship to the GOP and a LARGE Evangelical/Baptist following), so either my school district was scandalously progressive, or this is a norm in public schools.

And yeah, I STRONGLY believe that when kids get all of the facts (this is not to say moral direction, that is for the kids and parents to deal with for themselves) on sex and can make better choices for themsevles, we'll definitely have fewer abortions. People will finally take control of their fertility and we can work towards a country with a minimal abortion rate.

Now, my other question is....these kids are getting SEX thrown at them from a thousand different angles...pop culture, church, school, parents, friends....who exactly teaches them to have some self-respect when dealing with their bodies and sexuality? THat's the one wild card that no one seems concerned with. The more "progressive" people seem to leave it out favoring "just facts" and the right/religious people basically shame these kids into thinking sex is forbidden/dirty/bad (until you're married, of course, at which point they will instantly and magically have the facts and it will be earth-shatteringly good). I don't think it has anything to do with "morals" to teach kids how to act strong in relationships, and that's becoming another crisis too! Dating abuse and verbal/mental abuse is rampant with teens according to my old school counselor and I think that results in many kids, young women especially, making choices they not only regret, but could hurt them. I have no issues with the really well-prepared, confident, smart, mature teens deciding to express their sexuality, but are kids today really prepared to do that?

GingersMom, I know that exactly what is taught will be different at every school. But when we were learning about STD's, we were taught that you can also get pretty much any STD through oral sex as well, not to mention anal which is often more risky.

I do think it is up to the parents to teach morals. I don't remember being lectured about morals regarding sex at all, although I do remember we were told that the only way to be 100% safe from STD's is to not have sex. Which is true, so that's okay especially since condoms and other methods of birth control were covered.

Kids learn about anatomy, body systems (digestive, olfactory, etc), basic disease prevention (hand washing, covering your mouth when you cough), etc, they should learn about reproduction, and the science/biology of their bodies. And yes, they should also learn about how to prevent pregnancy and disease.

If mom and dad want to instill their own moral ideals also, there is NO ONE stopping them. My teachers certainly did NOT go there, nor do they go there at planned parenthood.

I'm not sure why teaching basic biology and pregnancy/disease prevention is so scary to people.