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My cat has a love/hate relationship with me... please help

post #1 of 3
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I've had my cat for about 1.5 years. He is a maine coon and I love him to death. I recently purchased a house and we've been there for 2 months. I think he really likes it, but he LOVES going outside on the screened in porch.

Whenever I get home he wants to go outside and sniff around and rub all over the place. He actually wants to go outside anytime I get near the door.

Here's my problem that has started about 2 weeks ago. Sometimes I'll go outside to do something and I won't let him out (it might be too cold or for whatever reason). So, when I come back inside he is always waiting at the door. I just go past him and go sit down and get on the internet or whatever. Then he will usually run into the room and jump up and bit my arm! I mean he is really mad that I didn't let him go outside... I will try to pet him and he bits my hand hard.

I don't have a clue what to do. Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated. This is my first post btw so thanks!!!
post #2 of 3
Welcome to the forums!

Sounds like a real character! I too have a screened in porch and occasionally will take my gang into our fenced in back yard with supervision. Kit, Queen Empress Her Royal Highness, gets furious whenever I don't let her out. Thankfully, she doesn't bite but boy can she hurl curses!

I find with her that if I immediately try to calm her down it goes a long way. While she doesn't bite me she has no compunctions about biting the boys. Naturally, they don't love it and they certainly don't deserve it. I've found that if I scold her for the behavior she only gets angrier. While I don't want to encourage nastiness in her, I'd rather she let it go and not bleed the other cats.

Try addressing it right away with your cat. If he still follows you into another room you'll have to figure out how to discourage the biting without actually giving him your attention. I suspect he's biting because he wants you to pay attention to him and his needs. If you use your hands to move him away he'll have succeeded in getting a reaction out of you. It's not the reaction he wants, but still a reaction. Maybe you could keep a noise maker near you that he doesn't like or even that distracts him? Changing the subject goes such a long way with cats!
post #3 of 3
I had a shelter cat a few years back that had some difficulty with referred aggression. We discovered that he was monitoring his territory from the window and other cats would come to see him. It made him so excited and upset that he would turn his aggression onto who ever was handy. From what you say he does go out and mark the porch as his. He may be feeling the need to mark and protect his home and is frustrated when he know they are out there and he can't go out.

When I restricted my boy from using the porch on a daily basis he did calm but as soon as I allowed him back out onto the porch his stress level went up again. He was fine when we had the door open and he could come and go on the porch in the warm months.

I agree with distract and alter the behaviour with play. If he has a favorite toy you know he will play with it will get his mind out of the stress mode.
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