Originally Posted by theimp98
lol i like how this has become a debate over porn.
Anyway i am glad the Issue that started this has for now been taken care of.
Now as have been said, men are visual, looks is what drives most men at the start. later comes getting to know the person. However i dont care how much a man my love a women, or even how smoking hot she is, i guys are still going to look, And unless i miss my guess so do most of the ladies. It does not mean he does not love her, heck every time i stop at the mall, i fall love i mean lust 20 times or so. Just because look or even surf porn does not mean you dont love you wife or husband(by the way i find porn very boring)
What matters most is the ability to talk to the other person, I would be more worried about someone who spent hours in chat or even around someone else. Once your mate is able to talk to someone else better then they can talk to you, then your marriage is in trouble.
I like the way you put this.
I have been reading this thread unsure if I should respond because I do see both sides - in a way. Plus, I don't want anyone yelling at me!
For me, and this is only for me! - I find porn to be like fake wrestling. I cannot stand WWRaw or whatever they call it now and I have no patience for porn in my personal life. It is phony ... I imagine the "stars" filling out their shopping lists in their heads, planning what they will wear to their mother's birthday party, debating what punishment they should give their teen for a minor transgression. It is all horribly fake. We have imaginations, every single one of us. Men can undress women (and vise versa or same/same) a hundred times a day in any social situation. Anything I can imagine will be much better than anything I could find on a porn site or a porn DVD.
We are all visual creatures to some extent, yes, but so what? We have many other compunctions but we don't really need to do most of them. (am not at all sure this is coming out the way I mean)
When I think of porn as an entity, as an industry, I think of who really benefits. Yep, some big fat cat is making the big money. Think about all the branches of mainstream porn. It isn't all sweet music, candlelight and playful giggling and teasing. It can be raunchy. Who is it geared toward?
If one was to follow the links on many porn sites one would be suprised at what types of sites they lead to. All run by the same entities. No one is in the porn biz to make sure mainstream America is being satisfied. They are there to make money. To do that, they must diversify to satify as many "tastes" as possible.
If there was no gigantic porn industry, humanity would still go on, people would still become stimulated, would still have sexual relations and would still manage to multiply.
The sheer numbers of money pouring into the industry doesn't mean we have a healthy sexual appetite. To me, and am only speaking for me, it says that there are millions of people who are searching for something. I don't know what that would be.
I understand those who view porn together. Great! If they both enjoy it, lovely. If both do not, there is a problem.
In my 25 years of dating, there have only been two men who were not into porn because they found it ineffective.
For me, healthy sexuality does not need to include pornography, so I will stay single
As for cyber-sex, yep it is cheating unless both parties in the relationship have agreed that it is not.
Hope this made sense!