I should write a soap opra for my life

tavia'smom

TCS Member
Thread starter
Top Cat
Joined
Apr 8, 2006
Messages
3,020
Purraise
11
Location
Kentucky
I have not talked to the new guy in my life since sometime yesterday and we only talked for maybe 15 minutes then. And he never answered my phone call last night or when I tried to call when I was on my lunch break. But I find out something that I didn't like about him and its a big thing enough to make me repulse him. He has chickens and at first I thought he meant like my chickens egg chickens or even meat chickens which is fine with me because I am not opposed to raising chickens for food as long as its in a humane way meaning they are treated well while alive. Well he said something about getting a retired rooster and that didn't sound right so I asked him what he meant and he raises fighting chickens, game roosters, he said I don't fight them and I said raising them for someone else to fight is just as bad. And I can't stand that I think anyone who fights any animals should be horse whipped on the first offense. Its the cruelest thing in my mind. But its not illegal in KY to raise game chickens and so since he doesn't fight them doesn't do me any good to turn him in. But I guess I am back to being without anyone. Oh well I'd rather be single than have an animal abuser what if he decided to be mean to one of my babies I would have to break his neck. He told me about the game chickens yesterday, I tried to call him to ask him why he would do such things thinking maybe I could convince him how wrong this was and like I said he didn't answer the phone I guess he didn't want a sermon.
 

epona

TCS Member
Top Cat
Joined
Jul 24, 2006
Messages
4,663
Purraise
949
Location
London, England
I'm sorry to hear that


But you are right to stand by your principles on this. There are some areas in life where in a relationship you can compromise and 'agree to disagree', and there are some things and beliefs that are too important to us to compromise on - and for me this would definitely fall into the latter category.

If it's any consolation, at least you found out about this early on in the relationship, it would have been much harder on you to discover it later down the line.

 
  • Thread Starter Thread Starter
  • #3

tavia'smom

TCS Member
Thread starter
Top Cat
Joined
Apr 8, 2006
Messages
3,020
Purraise
11
Location
Kentucky
Yeah I would have hated to a found out months later. I just wish I could convince people to change such ways.
 

neetanddave

TCS Member
Top Cat
Joined
May 6, 2006
Messages
8,707
Purraise
1
Location
Tarheel State
Not to sound prejudiced or to be defending him at all, but his Hispanic heritage is probably what makes him think this is acceptable, Gail. Their culture doesn't think there's anything wrong with it, and he was probably raised around it.

Hard to judge him too harshly when he is maybe only doing what he knows and was taught his whole life was acceptable.

Maybe some education on the subject would help, but that might be like trying to teach you that its okay to hit cats and dogs when you know that its not right. You were raised to not do it, so going against it is foreign to your nature.

Unfortunately, this is one of the things a bi-racial bi-cultural relationship will bring to the forefront.
 
  • Thread Starter Thread Starter
  • #5

tavia'smom

TCS Member
Thread starter
Top Cat
Joined
Apr 8, 2006
Messages
3,020
Purraise
11
Location
Kentucky
Originally Posted by neetanddave

Not to sound prejudiced or to be defending him at all, but his Hispanic heritage is probably what makes him think this is acceptable, Gail. Their culture doesn't think there's anything wrong with it, and he was probably raised around it.

Hard to judge him too harshly when he is maybe only doing what he knows and was taught his whole life was acceptable.

Maybe some education on the subject would help, but that might be like trying to teach you that its okay to hit cats and dogs when you know that its not right. You were raised to not do it, so going against it is foreign to your nature.

Unfortunately, this is one of the things a bi-racial bi-cultural relationship will bring to the forefront.
I didn't know that it was accepted anywhere. How do you educate someone about something like that. He called me today from work to see how I was doing but was asleep well almost by the time I got home. He talks about how pretty his chickens are and petting them and such as that but how can you do that and then sell them to people who would fight them. And how can someone who sounds so nice be okay with this type of stuff I just don't get it.
 

theimp98

TCS Member
Top Cat
Joined
May 24, 2006
Messages
11,427
Purraise
2
Location
elyria, ohio
neets right, we have a large Hispanic population here, and those types of fights are common i turned in a guy i worked with back in my factory days.
One of my freinds turned in some guys last week for dog and chicken fighting.
he is hispanic and lives in a hispanic area. But to be far of lot of people in the deep south that are into that.

that is one reason i suggested you keep things as friends and just talking until you get a chance to know him better. It does not make him a bad, person it is what he is used to, and what he thinks is ok. Only time and a lot of converstion can maybe change him.

by the way that is a big thing in indo also, along with bull racing,

good luck
 

carolpetunia

TCS Member
Top Cat
Joined
Oct 25, 2005
Messages
9,669
Purraise
17
Location
Plano, Texas
Living in Texas, I also understand that it's a cultural thing -- but anyone who has engaged in this abominable practice in this country for even a short time cannot help but be aware that there are moral objections to it. And once he became aware of such objections, how could he not have the integrity to search his own soul and start reconsidering the attitudes he grew up with?

You did the right thing, absolutely, without question. I admire your decision.
 

katl8e

TCS Member
Veteran
Joined
Jan 21, 2002
Messages
12,622
Purraise
3
Location
Movin' on up!
Same thing, in AZ. Every time we try to ban cockfighting, they bring up the Hispanic cultural thing. Well, we don't alow bullfighting here, either and nobody complains about THAT.

I don't think that I'd want to be involved with a man who contributes to blood sports, either.
 

kittylover4ever

TCS Member
Top Cat
Joined
May 10, 2004
Messages
21,696
Purraise
16
Location
Ohio
Oh Gail, I"m sorry but that man would be out of my life so fast it would make your head spin..............
 
  • Thread Starter Thread Starter
  • #10

tavia'smom

TCS Member
Thread starter
Top Cat
Joined
Apr 8, 2006
Messages
3,020
Purraise
11
Location
Kentucky
Well he decided to give me a call today and when I told him what I thought about all of this stuff to do with the game chickens and such he decided to call me back later. Well then he called and discussed everything for about 15 minutes before informing me that he would not be calling for a few days so that I would be more likely to call him or go out on a date with him. And I am sorry but I am over all of this just makes me mad that I had such bad judgement in a person again. Why do I always do this I always think people are as nice as they come across and then I end up realizing they are yet the same old same old. Why can't I for once look at people like my cat does under great suspition. Sorry that I am ranting I am simply kicking myself in the rear. One day I will learn to listen to Bruce and maybe be a little more cynical.
 

proudkittiemom

TCS Member
Top Cat
Joined
Nov 11, 2006
Messages
5,037
Purraise
12
Location
Pittsburgh PA
Dont worry i think we have all been through that and i am just like u, i decided to take a break tho for now
u will meet the right person one day
 

ericanicole

TCS Member
Top Cat
Joined
Jul 31, 2006
Messages
1,454
Purraise
2
Location
No Vacancy...One on the way!
Its not like this is something you could just get over..if you feel strongly about it ...and you do then there is nothing wrong with saying goodbye to him.

Besides there is no way I would want to be around that kind of stuff or hang out with people who did that kind of cruel stuff. I would much rather see two grown men willingly beat the crap out of each other then two chickens who have no choice.
geeze some men
 

proudkittiemom

TCS Member
Top Cat
Joined
Nov 11, 2006
Messages
5,037
Purraise
12
Location
Pittsburgh PA
Originally Posted by EricaNicole

Its not like this is something you could just get over..if you feel strongly about it ...and you do then there is nothing wrong with saying goodbye to him.

Besides there is no way I would want to be around that kind of stuff or hang out with people who did that kind of cruel stuff. I would much rather see two grown men willingly beat the crap out of each other then two chickens who have no choice.
geeze some men
I completely agree with that
that was very well put
 
  • Thread Starter Thread Starter
  • #14

tavia'smom

TCS Member
Thread starter
Top Cat
Joined
Apr 8, 2006
Messages
3,020
Purraise
11
Location
Kentucky
Originally Posted by ProudKittieMom

I completely agree with that
that was very well put
I agree as well. I am simply mad at myself for not being able to see through him. I tend to try and see the good in all people and I am starting to wonder if that is such a good thing. What good does it do if I don't see that bad in people too at first. And I am sorry but I can never get used to the idea of someone liking fighting two animals of any kind.
 

theimp98

TCS Member
Top Cat
Joined
May 24, 2006
Messages
11,427
Purraise
2
Location
elyria, ohio
Originally Posted by Tavia'smom

I agree as well. I am simply mad at myself for not being able to see through him. I tend to try and see the good in all people and I am starting to wonder if that is such a good thing. What good does it do if I don't see that bad in people too at first. And I am sorry but I can never get used to the idea of someone liking fighting two animals of any kind.
no reason to be mad at yourself. its the whole getting to know someone process. in other words dating sucks and at times not much fun at times. Plus side i at time can be fun, and i did make a few friends that sill have today.

lol lets see i had women dump me for, having long hair, later for having no hair. been dumped for motorycles, having tattoo's, flying airplanes,having guns, i used to hunt, etc, etc, tec, the list goes on for ever. and Yes a few time for a difference in thinking, heck i even had people who refused to go out after they found out i was gamer.

to meet the right person takes time, and lots of meeting of frogs if you will.
before the right person will shows up.
 
  • Thread Starter Thread Starter
  • #16

tavia'smom

TCS Member
Thread starter
Top Cat
Joined
Apr 8, 2006
Messages
3,020
Purraise
11
Location
Kentucky
Originally Posted by theimp98

no reason to be mad at yourself. its the whole getting to know someone process. in other words dating sucks and at times not much fun at times. Plus side i at time can be fun, and i did make a few friends that sill have today.

lol lets see i had women dump me for, having long hair, later for having no hair. been dumped for motorycles, having tattoo's, flying airplanes,having guns, i used to hunt, etc, etc, tec, the list goes on for ever. and Yes a few time for a difference in thinking, heck i even had people who refused to go out after they found out i was gamer.

to meet the right person takes time, and lots of meeting of frogs if you will.
before the right person will shows up.
Well of of the things you mentioned would not bother me including the hunting. But honestly its more than the game chickens and such as that. I am starting to get little red flags regarding him and I learned to listen to those a long time ago. But the game chickens and going to fights is a biggy. I pride myself in speaking out against such cruel acts of violence on animals as fighting them and I CANNOT even think of dating someone who does not share this particular belief. But I still want to kick myself. And I am still tired of the frogs.
 
Top