What is wrong with people??? Stupid customers...

Ooh I remember out bad restaurant experience now! We were out with friends trying a relatively new pasta joint. There was 6 of us, and it wasn't TOO busy. We had to keep flagging down the waiter for water (and it was just bottles they had in their fridge, it wasn't as though he was even pouring for us), it took forever for him to take our order, then everything came and DH's didn't. We flagged down our not-so-friendly waiter, and he asked what DH ordered and then he says "ohhh we're out of that, what else would you like". :censor::censor::censor:?!?!? He KNEW it was out by that stage, and hadn't come to ask how our meals were, so hadn't realised DH's hadn't come because they did't have any... By this time, we'd finished our meals. DH just asked for whatever was fast, and got something simple which eventually came.

Then after dinner another 2 friends who had hope to join us for dinner but couldn't turned up and squeezed into our table and just ordered drinks, while some of us ordered desserts. I asked for a cup of tea, and he asked what sort and I said "what do you have? Maybe an Earl Grey or something like that", and he said he'd bring the selection. He came back with a cup of hot water and a huge wooden box of teas... which was pretty much empty. All that was left was 2 flavours of herbal tea which were very bizarre flavours. I said not to bother, I really wanted black tea.

So he took the box away. Then the bill came, and I said I was only going to tip $1 due to the horrible service. It really did ruin the evening, it was just one thing after another. Then we realised they'd included a 20% gratuity because we had 7 or more people. We HAD 6 for most of the evening, but 2 joined us for drinks right at the end (and had A drink each), I couldn't believe the cheek to then charge us for 7 or more people!!!

AND to make it worse, they charged me for the cup of tea that I didn't have due to their crap selection so I paid for teh cup of hot water that I didn't have or want.

Completely ridiculous.

On the other hand, with mostly the same people plus a bunch more (I think there was 12 of us), we went to a really nice Thai restaurant, and there was pretty much just the one person looking after us, and she was so attentive, and we could tell she had a few tables to look after, the food was fast and excellent, and she stayed away enough to give us space to talk (I hate wait staff that don't leave you alone), but kept our glasses full, and the food came out all together.

We got charged the large party gratuity and then we somehow managed to all put too much money in, and ended up with double the tip necessary (it was well over $100 I think...) but we figured she was so good, we'd just give her that

I can totally sympathize...I used to be the receptionist at a small regional museum (which means I answered phones, but also sold tickets, opened the place, took care of the reptile exhibit and gave tours if necessary)...I was expected to open on holiday weekends and any other day we were open regardless of the weather. I made cents over minimum wage.

Once after making the epic journey there in a blizzard, my first customers arrived two hours into my shift. The guy walks in, dumps a ton of snow off his boots and coat right in front of my desk and says "gee, I'm really surprised they made you open the place in this weather"...I thought (but didn't say) yeah buddy, I risked my life so you could come in and buy a $3.50 planetarium ticket...why are you here???

Yes, the US taxes servers not on their income, but based on the companies sales. When I first started waitressing I was told my the district manager that we only needed to claim enough times to equal minimum wage. After working there for 5 yrs, the company got audited and I got a letter saying I owed over $4000 in back taxes! In fact, ALL the full time waitresses owed, and when I talk to H&R Block, they basically said "sorry for your luck, but your manager was wrong". So, yes...tipping is expected and NEEDED in the US!

I haven't waited tables for over 8 years and still have those waitressing nightmares...you know, the ones where you the place is full, you are the only waitress and nothing goes right. In fact, I had one last night, and I find this thread today...hmmmmm.

The tip I remember the most was a older lady that paid with her credit card and made a big deal about tipping me $0.25! THEN, told my manger what a great waitress I was! I mean she just said I was wonderful! I was insulted at first, but then I thought maybe that was all she could afford, or she thought she was still living in the 40's.

Originally Posted by calico2222

Yes, the US taxes servers not on their income, but based on the companies sales. When I first started waitressing I was told my the district manager that we only needed to claim enough times to equal minimum wage. After working there for 5 yrs, the company got audited and I got a letter saying I owed over $4000 in back taxes! In fact, ALL the full time waitresses owed, and when I talk to H&R Block, they basically said "sorry for your luck, but your manager was wrong". So, yes...tipping is expected and NEEDED in the US!

I haven't waited tables for over 8 years and still have those waitressing nightmares...you know, the ones where you the place is full, you are the only waitress and nothing goes right. In fact, I had one last night, and I find this thread today...hmmmmm.

The tip I remember the most was a older lady that paid with her credit card and made a big deal about tipping me $0.25! THEN, told my manger what a great waitress I was! I mean she just said I was wonderful! I was insulted at first, but then I thought maybe that was all she could afford, or she thought she was still living in the 40's.

Click to expand...

Elderly people do tend to tip a lot less, mainly because they still think they are living in the 40s. You're right! Some of them probably don't have money either, so I don't mind... but it sure is annoying. Occasionally, so hip perverted old man will come in and tip really well though, as long as you flirt appropriately.

You still have dreams 8 years later? Goodness... I hope I don't. It's scary how often I dream of really bad days at work... this is the first job I've had where I have dreams like that.

Serving is a humiliating experience when you have rude customers... I think it finds it's way into your subconscious.

When I go out to eat I usually tip at least 15% or round round up the bill for instance so its say $25 with tip instead of $24.63!! I would think that most people in the US would know how little true wage servers receive but I guess not.
You sound like a great waitress!!

I would just like to add that as a former server, there is a level of hell for those that do not tip well where you spend all day running around in circles carrying a heavy tray with 20 different people yelling at you "Miss? Miss? Miss?"

also, if you receive bad service, COMPLAIN TO THE MANAGER, you may very well get a free meal, the the waitress will be on the manager's radar and if she continues to deliver bad service may be relieved of her job and she won't subject others to her horrendous service, leaving a tiny tip does nothing but make the waitress think you are scum especially if she doesn't realize that she gave you bad service, which does happen. When I used to serve there were a couple times I would jump up in the middle of the night and think "Crap! I forgot to get those extra napkins!!" and while most of the time a food related problem is not the server's fault, there is no way a server should be serving burnt to a crisp food or something obviously wrong.

In the US, tipping is as good as mandatory as waitresses do make a pittance, usually less than $3/hr, if you cannot afford a tip, go to McDonald's.

Originally Posted by Godiva

Elderly people do tend to tip a lot less, mainly because they still think they are living in the 40s. You're right! Some of them probably don't have money either, so I don't mind... but it sure is annoying. Occasionally, so hip perverted old man will come in and tip really well though, as long as you flirt appropriately.

You still have dreams 8 years later?

Goodness... I hope I don't. It's scary how often I dream of really bad days at work... this is the first job I've had where I have dreams like that.

Serving is a humiliating experience when you have rude customers... I think it finds it's way into your subconscious.

Click to expand...

Oh, I have very vivid dreams! The worst one I remember was when I was still working at Pizza Hut. My district manager sabataged the other restaurants in the area so everyone came to mine. I was the only waitress and the oven shorted out. So, I was cooking the pizzas at home and carrying them, on foot (15 minute drive) to my restaurant. Back and forth...customers yelling, staff yelling. I still need therapy!

Yeah, it does get into your subconscious!

If I receive very good service, I tell the manager. If I receive very bad service, I tell the manager. I tip at LEAST 15%, unless the server is bad (not busy busy busy, but BAD). I can tell when a server is busy and trying to keep up vs. one who just doesn't care. If service is really good, I tell DH at least 20%.

Now, some of my horror stories...

I was at Steak N' Shake in town a few years ago, late at night. It wasn't busy at all. Our waitress (or server, whichever is the proper term) just took our drink order. I know she was our waitress because she told us she was. Someone else brought us our drinks. Ten minutes later, we asked someone as they walked by if they could get our waitress because we were ready to order. Yeah, right. Someone ELSE (not the same one who got our drinks) came by and said, "I'm sorry, your waitress is held up with something right now. May I take your order?"

Basically, other servers took care of us, while our waitress talked non-stop by the pop machine. We could see her clearly where we were. She was leaning against the counter, just chit-chatting away. The manager wasn't even there at the time (how great is that?).

We talked to one of the many servers who had taken care of us and gave them some cash and said, "Split this between you and the others who took care of us, but NOT our waitress." Then we left a penny on the table, with a frowny face drawn on it, and left. I called the next day and spoke with the manager regarding the issue, and they offered to give us our money back. I declined because the other servers stepped up, but still...how could someone treat customers that way???

Now, here's a positive one:

We were at Applebee's and we had a pleasant experience with the meal, but dessert was taking quite a while. DH and I are pretty mild-mannered people, so we didn't get nasty or anything, just waited. Well, the manager appeared, said that there was an issue with the first order (I think they burnt it!) and said that the dessert was on him and would be out shortly.

When we tipped the 20%, it was based on if the dessert was included because the waitress not only made dinner pleasant, but had gotten the manager involved when something was beyond her control (i.e., the kitchen burning our dessert!). lol

All in all, I try to treat my server as I want them to treat me: with respect, dignity, and appreciation.

First I want to say we tip 20% unless it was really bad service. What I don't understand is why one person takes your order, another serves the food, and another clears your table and takes your dessert order or finds the original server to bring the bill?! How do you determine a tip with you have multiple people at your table?!

Originally Posted by ckatz

OMG -a penny!!! This is why when I quit my last waitress job, I threw out those clothes and vowed to starve to death rather than ever do that job again.

That was over 30 yrs ago and this still makes my blood boil. So I'm leaving this discussion before I lost my temper and use language that will get me kicked off this site.

Click to expand...

My Dad told me to always leave a nickle for very bad service. I've only had to do that once, because the waitress was more interested in flirting with a group of men then in serving my sister and me.

Originally Posted by Denice

I personally like the way it was done in Germany better. People were paid a better wage and tipping wasn't done. I have always tipped 20% unless service was really bad. When I am by myself I usually tip a little more than that because I figure I am occuping one of the tables with a smaller order than two people would have.

Click to expand...

I do this too! I occasionally eat alone at a diner. Often I am not given good service b/c I'm a lone diner, but I still leave 20%. One day though, I was treated like royalty by the server...a first when I'm alone! I was so grateful and bowled over I left a $5 tip on a $10 check. I usually leave $2-$3 on a $9-10 check when I'm alone.

I enjoy these kind of threads, being both a customer and a former server.
Even if the service a atrocious, I can't leave less than 15% w/o shaking and practically crying! LOL...since it is so ingrained in me to leave a decent tip.

I've had many experiences where the server disappears for long periods of time and never checks back on us....I have no problem getting up and chasing them down or finding the manager and asking for things. I bet servers just love me! LOL

Oh, also, I had an interesting chat with a gentleman awhile ago:

He said he used to be a so-so tipper, didnt really know the "rules" but after he read: Nickel and Dimed: not getting by in America - he started leaving hefty tips all the time! He had a new understanding.

During this convo I said, "Yeah, and they often have to tip out also". He didnt know what that was...so I explained it and his eyes got buggy! Like, he could NOT believe how little $ goes to servers all things considered. I'm glad to have educated him - doing my part for servers!

Originally Posted by Crazyforinfo

First I want to say we tip 20% unless it was really bad service. What I don't understand is why one person takes your order, another serves the food, and another clears your table and takes your dessert order or finds the original server to bring the bill?! How do you determine a tip with you have multiple people at your table?!

Click to expand...

Well, at where I work, sometimes we all get too busy to run our own food, so we have a policy. Hot food goes out the door to the table. If you have a moment inbetween tables, you are expected to run food from the kitchen for servers that are busy. The bussers bus the tables because if we had to clean up our tables ourselves, we would never be able to take orders, get refills and salads, and bread, make salads, or drop checks. Only the server is allowed to drop a check at our restaurant, unless the check has a survey or the table complained, then the manager has to drop it. If I'm not busy, I never have to let anyone else do any of the above (except things that require a manager), but it it's rush hour (so to speak), there's no way I could keep up without the system we have in place. This has to happen because people are inpatient. Most people will sit quietly and wait for dessert, but it bothers me when it's obvious that I have three other tables than them, who also need things, and they are gonna have to wait in line for their turn after they've asked. Staring me down isn't going to help... it'll just make me nervous and flustered because I know you're unhappy.

We solve this problem of who to tip by a practice called "tipping out." At most places, all the servers have to tip out a certain percentage of their tips to the bussers, bartenders, hostesses, and food runners (if there are any... it's usually just us doing that). Where I work, we are not required to tip out anything, but your tables won't get bussed, your food will get burned or just never come to the window, and your drinks from the bar won't get made. Some nights 90% of my tips go to tipping out, if it was slow. I come home with a five dollar bill those days.

I've read that book, CDubbie. It's wonderful. I think everyone should read it, especially greedy corporate types and bosses of the wage-slaves (like myself) who don't like to give raises!

OOOHHH... I get what you're saying now! Yeah, from a server perspective, it's strange how people will not tip anything because one person in the chain was rude or forgot something. I really hate that. Tipping really is a sucky system if you ask me... and most customers are only vaguely familiar of how a restaurant works, so that makes it even harder for everyone. If I didn't know what went on behind the scenes, I'd be worried too... but don't worry, if you hate your server but loved that cute little busboy who grabbed your water refill when your server was busy, go ahead and tip as normal and leave a note. Or go up to the person you want to tip and give it to them directly. Don't make a practice of it though, because your server will still have to tip them out anyway.

One thing I can say is that if you leave less than 12% or so, either tell the server what they did wrong or leave a note. Otherwise, they will just assume you're cheap, remember your face, and take note. We never hear of what customers are saying or thinking about us unless we did something AWFUL, so we don't get feedback on how to change how we do things.

Which reminds me... another thing that annoys me is the people that say, "You're such a good server!" and then leave a horrible tip. I even had someone go to the manager today to compliment me, but only left me a dollar. I really appreciate the sentiment, but I'd rather you not come in at all if you don't have the money. I'm just sayin'.

I need to quit having wine and posting on here... I talk way too much!

Working with the public is very difficult, because most people are idiots or a-holes (excluding the people on this forum).

I'm very down on the human race at the moment.

I waited tables for a few years in my teens at a few family style restaurants and remember the low wages, so I tip 20 percent for good service, and 15 percent for so-so service.IF the service is really bad then I tell the manager, and leave no tip. Occasionally I will give 25 percent or more if the service was outstanding or if we stay for a long time chatting after dinner.

I do think it is criminal what we pay servers though, and I would be more than happy to see the cost of a meal increased by 20-25 percent, so the wait staff be given a decent living wage. That way the tip could go back to being a gratuity.

gratuity (an award (as for meritorious service) given without claim or obligation)

Originally Posted by ckatz

But it's a standard to tip in a service resturant-if you can't afford an additional 15-20% then you can't afford to go out or go to a place that doesn't have service employees.

Click to expand...

Very true!

Unless you've worked as a waitress here in the US, there are a few things you should know when deciding on how to tip.

Less than minimum wage - taxes + no tip = no pay for the waitress = slavery. In many states you are required to report 8% of your sales as income, if the waitress averages less than 8% on his/her nightly checks, she loses money. I've had nights where I actually had to pay to work.

Look around the restaurant. If it's busy, then most likely so is the server. That doesn't mean you should get bad service, but don't consider service bad if it's slow on a busy night.

Kitchen service vs. sever service. So many times I hear people complain about a bad experience they had at a restaraunt and blaming the server when it was most likely the kitchen's fault. If the waitress is attentive, but your food comes out late or wrong it might be the kitchen's fault.

15% is the minimum you should tip for good service. If you are eating at a cheap food place where there is food service, consider tipping more than usual since the checks are small and a larger than expected tip can really brighten a server's day.

---------------------
My favorite job as a waitress was working at a country club where tips were not allowed, and we made $12 per hour. It was really nice because we really got to know our regulars, and we were tipped really big for events. Your pay increased if you were requested more, and that gave incentive to really please our customers. We were tipped often, and got pretty nice gifts during the holidays.

---------------------
My worst experience dining at a restaurant was on Christmas Eve, my SIL and I screwed up dinner, so we decided to eat out. We went to a place that had been advertising for ages that they were open on Christmas Eve. It was just 4 of us, and we're all pretty laid back. Three of us had been waiters before, so we thanked our waiter for being out that night as he took our drinks. He was all smiles and told us that actually he was leaving in about 5 minutes to spend Christmas with his family and that another waiter would take our table. By this time we were all full of holiday cheer.

In comes the waiter from hell. Mind you we had the table in the center of the restaurant, so we were pretty much within ear shot of all the other patrons. The waiter comes up and says "What do you want?" very rudely. Thinking he was joking we started laughing a bit and asked for some calamari and a bottle of champagne and a little more time with the menu. He responded so rudely saying how we were wasting his time by not knowing what we wanted yet. After he left our table in a huff my brother was a little agitated and wanted to talk to the manager. I talked him out of it (silly me), and told him to just let it go, the poor guy was working on Christmas.

The fiasco of ordering the food was a whole other ordeal and again I had to talk my brother out of going to the manager. By this time other people in the restaraunt were sort of mumbling and rolling their eyes at our waiter every time he talked to us. When the food came out, he served each of us something COMPLETELY different than what we ordered. My brother finally asked for the manager. The waiter YELLED at us for a few minutes saying how we were trying to be difficult and stormed out to get the manager. Other customers at the restaraunt were saying stuff like "my god" and "I can't believe that just happened".

In comes the manager from hell! Right off the bat the manager comes out yelling. He's on a huge rant talking about how we're being difficult and that we should be lucky they even opened their doors on Christmas Eve, and how people like us shouldn't be allowed into restaurants. My brother stood up and said he wanted to pay our tab and leave. He handed his credit card to the manager who threw it back at him and it bounced off somewhere. We got up and walked out along with several other tables. I was shocked beyond belief.

A guy from another table who also walked out wanted us to call the cops, and another said he was a reporter and would write an article about this in his newspaper.

We ended up having Christmas dinner at an IHOP where our lovely waitress got a $400 tip (we basically paid her what we would have paid for our entire meal at the other restaurant). She deserved it since she had to work on Christmas and she had little ones at home.

Ugh... that's horrible! I can't imagine treating my guests that way.

I just read what I wrote last night... it totally came out all wrong. Wine does that to you.

I had to avoid this post for a couple days for fear of saying something that I'd still truly love to say, but won't It would sound horribly mean, which overall I don't really care about the opinion of such people, but this is a nice website. I know for a fact that not tipping isn't just some cultural thing in Canada. I ate lunch a couple weeks ago with a friend from Manitoba and she never tips less than 15%. In fact she left a $5 tip on a $10 check. If I made $7 an hour and got free health insurance I wouldn't worry about tips either, but I made $2.13 an hour and was also required to claim at least 10% of my sales, even when I'd have to tip out 10% of my tips to the busser, the food runner, and 1% of my sales to the bartender. I could easily tip out 40% of my tips by the end of the night. Like Godiva, I worked at the Olive Garden. It maybe a choice, but when you are in grad school it's hard to find a job with such flexible hours. Very few places let you take off a month for a summer class or only work evenings and weekends, or work split shifts so that you have time to get studying in. As a server I expect to make what most other people make in my region- which is often the case. I was happy making 8-10 an hour, but of course extra happy to make more

I do have to say that telling management about bad service is the best way to go. Your server might be new and may need to know that they did something wrong. You can't learn if you don't know there was a problem. Sometimes bad servers need to be weeded out as well, other times they may just be having a bad night.

I hate Nickel and Dimed. It's ridiculous. I read the whole book and it made me boil! The woman who wrote it obviously felt like she was totally better than these people and was acting like she was "discovering" something. Half the people in America know exactly what it is like to ACTUALLY live on minimum wage, without being able to dip into your hefty bank account if times get too tough. She didn't show any of the emotional aspect, or teamwork, or social structure. That whole sense of entitlement... if she had been working with me, and told me "Oh, I just did this for a book actually I have a bunch of money!" I would have been SOOO mad, especially after helping her, training her, etc. Morgan Spurlock did the same thing and did it better. Watch his 30 Days on minimum wage. He doesn't start off with 1000 dollars.

Puts the hijack ninja back in its cage...