"new" cat still not getting along with first cat like I would him to.

keith p

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2 years ago I adopted a neutered male cat from a shelter (new cat), he is now 4. He is great with people except when you pick him up, but otherwise he is ok with us.

Now him and my 6 year old spayed female (first cat) just dont seem to get along "normally" and I really havent found a solution to fix the problem either.

My male cat is very hyper and playful, sometimes too rough. My female cat plays, but is pretty gentle and relaxed compared to him.

Here are some issues I see, mabye you can tell if their normal behavior or not.

1. When we first introduced the male to our female, the female hid under a table and would not come out, but the the male was prancing around like he owned the place, he was so calm not even scared of our female cat, meanwhile she was the one hiding in terror!

2. The male seems like he always wants to attack her. She could be sleeping or eating, and if she lets her guard down for a second, he will run up to her and chase her, if he catches up to her he will jump on her back and she will scream. Because of this, she is now always looking around when she walks, nervous he will pop out from somewhere. She walks VERY slowly especially by the couch, thats where he usually waits for her to come by, then chases after her. If she is sleeping and hears the faintest noise she will wake up and run out of the room thinking it was him coming after her, because he will jump on her when she is sleeping too. Even going to the bathroom, she will go and dash out of the litterbox upstairs because he is waiting right outside for her to come out, he spends most of his day "stalking her" like his prey. He will also corner her in a tight spot, and let out this piercing meow, meanwhile our female is cornered and has her back arched and is hissing loudly. He will even go as far as sitting in the steps, so as she runs past him he trips her! She is now a very nervous cat, before we got him she was calm and relaxed, and would sleep anywhere in the house without a care in the world. It seems we cant do anything with her without him chasing her away or making her life miserable.

She goes diarrhea all the time now, I dont know if it's nerves or not and im a bit concerned, especially about her getting hurt from him like broken bones or bites. (we are going to have her get a fecal exam in case you were wondering about the diarrhea)

When he is about to chase her, his pupils get very large and his whiskers go to the side of his face. Sometimes she will chase him for play, but it's rare, and hissing is always involved by her. When he chases her she is hissing as she is running, he never hisses. He is not afraid of her at all and sleeps without caring if she is there or not, but she is terrified of him. SOMETIMES they will touch noses, then she will hiss and swipe him in the face with her paw.

A little background on our male cat:
He was found in a dumpster as a kitten and being his good disposition with people was put up for adoption. As a kitten he spent his life in a cage with no other kittens to play with. A year went by and nobody adopted him, so he was moved to the animal shelter, again he was all alone in a cage. He was then adopted by a man, but at the mans house an older male cat constantly attacked our male cat, who in that house was the youngest male, he was not neutered at the time. The man may have hit our cat too for reasons we dont know, but anyway our cat was returned to the shelter, where we later adopted him then at the age of 2, he was fixed. he is now 4.


We talked to our vet and he said try spraying him with water or making a loud noise to stop him from doing these things, it's been 2 years and it hasnt stopped. It's so hard to make the vet understand what our male does at home. I never heard of cats acting like this unless they were 2 fighting males. We cant get rid of our male cat, we had him for 2 years and if we didnt adopt him he was actually going to be put to sleep. I dont know what to do to make them get along with each other. To let my female cat finally be able to trust him knowing he wont go after her.
 

yayi

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Originally Posted by keith p

My male cat is very hyper and playful, sometimes too rough. My female cat plays, but is pretty gentle and relaxed compared to him.

Here are some issues I see, mabye you can tell if their normal behavior or not.

1. When we first introduced the male to our female, the female hid under a table and would not come out, but the the male was prancing around like he owned the place, he was so calm not even scared of our female cat, meanwhile she was the one hiding in terror!
Normal.

Originally Posted by keith p

2. The male seems like he always wants to attack her. She could be sleeping or eating, and if she lets her guard down for a second, he will run up to her and chase her, if he catches up to her he will jump on her back and she will scream. Because of this, she is now always looking around when she walks, nervous he will pop out from somewhere...
Your boy is not only playful, he is the dominant cat. Based on his background, I am not surprised. But time outs will bring down his aggressive behavior towards your girl.

Originally Posted by keith p

She goes diarrhea all the time now, I dont know if it's nerves or not and im a bit concerned, especially about her getting hurt from him like broken bones or bites. (we are going to have her get a fecal exam in case you were wondering about the diarrhea)
Diarrhea is a sign of illness. I do not think your boy can break her bones unless it's a real bad cat fight and both end up falling off the roof or they knock down the TV and it falls on top of them.

Originally Posted by keith p

SOMETIMES they will touch noses, then she will hiss and swipe him in the face with her paw.
Normal.

Originally Posted by keith p

I never heard of cats acting like this unless they were 2 fighting males.
No. I have females bullying the boys and sometimes it's the other way around.
 
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