Intro Problem

I really need some advice.
The introduction between Kitty and Maisie has been going well, I thought. Kitty seems to be intimidated by her though. He has showed no signs of aggression just been a bit off with me. Maisie is very sweet with me but hisses at Kitty.
They have seen each other three times now. Each time lasting only about a minute.

Kitty has always been an indoor/outdoor cat. I first got him because he lived in our garden for about three months and I don`t think he would cope well with being indoor only.
Maisie shows no interest in going out which I am glad about because I`d like her to stay in.

The thing is Kitty is spending more and more time out. Yesterday he went out at about 12pm, came back for some supper and stayed for half an hour then went back out and I didn`t see him till the morning.
Today he wasn`t home when I finished work and he hasn`t come home yet.
I know where he is.
He`s in the flat next door. I know the man very well and he just rang me to say Kitty is asleep on his bed. He knows he mustn`t feed him but I don`t know if he does occasionally.

What can I do? I did always wonder if Kitty left his last home because he didn`t get along with anouther cat in the house, that`s why I never got a companion for him. He was very happy being an only cat.

I don`t want to lock the cat flap with him indoors because he will feel trapped and when he did go out he might never come back. I`m worried he may still `run away` and he`s eventually not going to come home.

I feel so bad for him and I miss him and the close bond we shared badly

My cats are all indoor/outdoor. The 3 oldest boys were strays. After they were neutered, I noticed that they do not roam as much but will visit "friendly" neighbors. Fortunately they are not as consistent as I am when it comes to giving treats so their outside excursions are rare.
In your case, it seems that Maisie has claimed your home her place and Kitty has not done anything to contradict her. If he did not want her around, he would have behaved differently whether he is indoor or outdoor.

aww dont feel bad, I think it is still early days, maybe you are thinking he's staying out more, when he's not really, you know what I mean

I am worried sick about Miss Moofi, as you know Teddy is being a real rascal with her and she seems to go out more She's our baby and I feel terrible, but I know in time things will settle to a routine for them. But I have to remember it will be THEIR routine - yes I'd love it if they were all the best of buddies and snuggled up with each other, but none of them do that anyway.

I think its best just to carry on as normal, keep letting them spend time together, extend it each time. I dont know what to suggest about the neighbour, at least you know where Kitty is, if you asked him to stop letting him in, then I think you'd worry that he may go further afield I am sure you are fussing & loving Kitty more, so keep doing that and he'll settle into his new way of life

Keep us posted !

Well, he`s still not home

I was just thinking he is staying away because suddenly there`s this new cat in HIS home and she doesn`t like him so it`s easier for him to stay out more which doesn`t help with the intro`s because I cant bring her out when he finally comes back because it would just drive him away even more.
I`m probably not making any sense. Sorry.

Ann, I`m sorry your experiencing the same kind of thing. Maybe now Teddy is neutered they will get along better? I hope so.

Did Kitty come home

He came back around half 10. Spent the night under the radiator in the hall by the door. Usually he sleeps with me but he was having none of it. At the moment he`s asleep on the sofa and I managed to sneak Maisie into the bedroom so she could have a play. It is the first time I`ve seen her really play! She was charging round after this toy but she`s a bit wobbly so she fell over a few times. Also forgot the window was open a bit, left her to sort out her room, came back and she was gone! Luckily we`re in the basement and theres a locked gate at the side so she couldn`t have gone anywhere and she enjoyed the fresh air.
I think Kitty is staying here because I`m not at work. Wont do any intro`s today just let him settle. Wish I didn`t have to work monday because he might go again if I`m not here. Have to wait and see.

oh thats good news, at least you have the whole weekend - so hope he realises that his mum loves him tons still