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Can I get a "welcome back"? LoL

post #1 of 14
Thread Starter 
Wow, I just noticed that the last time I logged on was December 31, 2006... My bday... hehe... So, here I am... Its been a while and stuff's been happening recently that just sucks!

Adrian and I have gone our separate ways... Well, he's gone his way.. and I've stayed right here trying to locate all the pieces of my shattered heart... After, 3 years of telling me that he never wanted to be with anyone... He's decided that he doesnt want to be single anymore... and it turns out that I'm not the girl he wants to be with... Which really sucks to hear... "I think I'm ready to be with someone but I've realized that it's not you...."

I didnt know it was actually possible to feel your heart break... but believe me when I tell you... it is.... I actually got a visual of him with my heart in his hands and then all of sudden just dropping it and it shattering like glass when it hits the ground... God, it still hurts...
And now all I hear from everyone is "I told you so" "You should have never...." "Why did you...?" "Just forget him!" and believe me some of you can probably say the same things to me because a lot of you 'told me so!'
but that's not really why I came back here in the first place... I didnt really come back to talk about this... although I do need to get a lot of it off my chest and you've all listened before...

the real reason why I came back was because I've been feeling really restless after all this... and I've decided that I need to move out of my apartment and away from all the memories that we have here because we were living together... And I'm trying to decide if I should stay in NY or if I should move away... So, since everyone is from different places maybe I can get some ideas of nice places to move to...

I also think it's time that I get another kitten.. since Malakai is still living with my friends mom... I decided to let him stay there because she had become really attached to him and he had gotten used to being there so I didnt think it would be fair to take him away... but I'm trying to decide if I should get another kitten, actually 2, now or if I should wait till I move...
Any thoughts, comments, suggestions??
post #2 of 14
Hi Nice to see you back. I'm sorry you have had a tough time, but you sound as if you are getting your life back together
post #3 of 14
I'm glad to see you back! But I'm extremely sorry to hear of your breakup with Adrian

If your thinking of moving... Minnesota is nice! If you like the extreme differences in weather from one day to another

If your thinking of getting another kitten... I'd probably say to wait until you've decided on moving, moving can be hard on the cats, and I'd probably wait until your definately settled somewhere before bringing another one in and then moving.

I'm wishing you all the best of luck with everything, I'm always just a PM away if you need to talk
post #4 of 14
welcome back.

i'm sorry for your rough time but i suggest 2 kitties!!!!!!!!
post #5 of 14
Well, we'll welcome you back if you promise not to stay away so long!

And I agree with Renovia - get two kitties when you are ready!
post #6 of 14
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by babyharley View Post
I'm glad to see you back! But I'm extremely sorry to hear of your breakup with Adrian

If your thinking of moving... Minnesota is nice! If you like the extreme differences in weather from one day to another

If your thinking of getting another kitten... I'd probably say to wait until you've decided on moving, moving can be hard on the cats, and I'd probably wait until your definately settled somewhere before bringing another one in and then moving.

I'm wishing you all the best of luck with everything, I'm always just a PM away if you need to talk
It's funny that you suggested Minnesota... One of my friends lives there... and he complains about the weather all the time...

Truthfully, I dont know if I have the nerve to move out of NY... lol
post #7 of 14
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by gemlady View Post
Well, we'll welcome you back if you promise not to stay away so long!

And I agree with Renovia - get two kitties when you are ready!
I know Jan... u're right.. Ive been horrible about comin back....
maybe it's cuz I dont have Malakai anymore... so I dont have any silly kitty stories to share...

but I can't wait to get another kitty... cuz I feel like I have so much love and affection to give but I refuse to ever give it to another human... so, I'd love to shower it all on a little furball lol...

do you know that I was even considering.... gasp.... a dog!?! lol
but I'd have to have a cat too....
post #8 of 14
Sorry to read about your breakup.

Do you want to live in a large city or move to a smaller one-you could always try moving to an area with a major college/university so there would be more things to do?? If its a larger city you could try Chicago or Minneapolis. I'm sure it would depend on employment opportunities too.
I agree with two cats-if they are younger kittens they should handle a move ok.
post #9 of 14
Welcome back! I agree with Kenz....MN is nice, but don't plan on being able to shop locally unless you move to the Twin Cities area!

I also suggest two kitties at once. If you dont mind my opinion....I would suggest looking into a pair of adults. Not only are adults harder to adopt than kittens, but pairs are even more difficult to place. We've had many pairs of young adults come through our shelter...one pair was 10 months old!

Depending on where you are going to move & how soon....I'd wait until you are all settled in your new place. It's got to be hard enough to move without the "help" of a kitty of two!
post #10 of 14
Welcome back! So sorry to hear about your breakup. One of the things that I have always hated, is when your friends start telling how you're better off, he's a loser, etc.: but they never said anything while you are together! Why didn't they try and warn me about him before, etc?
Well, I live in N.H. and I just love New England! I don'y know what part of NY you are from, but I have also always loved the Albany area, even down towards Hudson, and I don't think it is too expensive to live there. Of course, alot depends on what kind of work you will be looking for!
post #11 of 14
Welcome back!! Sorry to hear about your breakup
post #12 of 14
Personally, you should wait to get another kitten to find out where you will be living, etc. Get your life back on track and evaluate all what happened. Next time, you'll find the right one for a lifelong committment.

Just as a helpful hint. After things have settled down, make a written list of the qualities you want in a guy to marry (15-20 things). Do this before you even start looking - that way you'll find the perfect match


As far as Minnesota - we have plenty of good shopping centers outside the city - IMO you have better shopping. Besides the guys in MN are better I was from Maryland - went to MN to find the BEST
post #13 of 14
Thread Starter 
Well, I wanna go back to school.. so that brings up another question... If I'm gonna move out of state, should I wait until I'm out of school so that I could relocate with better career options... or should I move before school so that I have a better chance of making new friends...

Honestly, I think I should just make it easier on myself and stay in NY... I'm dealing with a lot since Adrian left... maybe I shouldnt completely uproot myself... Moving to a new apartment would be sufficient enough of a change... at least it would get me away from the memories... It sux when I can't even walk around my apartment without thinking about him....
post #14 of 14
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by GoldenKitty45 View Post
Personally, you should wait to get another kitten to find out where you will be living, etc. Get your life back on track and evaluate all what happened. Next time, you'll find the right one for a lifelong committment.

Just as a helpful hint. After things have settled down, make a written list of the qualities you want in a guy to marry (15-20 things). Do this before you even start looking - that way you'll find the perfect match
To be perfectly honest... I've thought a lot about what has gone on in the last 3 years... and I've realized that none of this would have happened if I had listen to Adrian when he told me that love wasnt worth the pain and that I should just be content with his friendship...

Maybe I wouldnt be heartbroken now if I had never put my heart on the line in the first place... Which is why I refuse to do that ever again... I know that I am a good woman... and I know that I did all that I could to take care of and make Adrian happy... but that was never good enough for him because I was lacking something that he must have really needed... So, why should I invest my time and my heart in anyone? No one could possibly take care of my heart the way that I could... which is why I'm off-limits... I'll have to be content with having friendships... but as for giving my heart or my body away... never again.... I'd rather be alone and happy... than risk having another person break me...
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