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Should I feel guilty?

post #1 of 11
Thread Starter 
Hello!!

This may seem like a silly question but I am feeling guilty and just want to know what others have done. My lovely little kitty Alan is six months old. You may have read a few last posts that he was unwell with cat flu when I got him from the shelter. Well, now he is a lot better which is great. He is so adorable and now, very energetic. I am at home with him at the moment and we play and and I take him out in the garden with his harness on. He hasn't been 'done' yet as he wasn't well enough but will be done soon. The problem is is that he always, always wants to play. We have loads of toys for him and i play him lots but sometimes I have other things to do or too be honest, although I know playing with kitty is very stimulating for him, it's not that stimulating for me!!! When I don't play, he meows at me and follows me around the house doing it!! Very cute, but I don't want to end up with a high maintenance kitty. My bf says that as he has loads of toys he should learn to play on his own. I do play with him a lot but still feel guilty when he is begging to play more. Any advice???
post #2 of 11
No reason to feel guilty at all. You are right. You could be creating a monster! It sounds like your cat likes a lot more attention than one person can reasonably give him. He might like having another kitty around! No doubt you would want to adopt a cat who is from a foster home with limited exposure to other cats and who is fully vaccinated after the flu trouble you've already had. The upside is that your cat is very young and young cats tend to be super-active. As he ages the amount of time he needs from you will begin to subside. He sounds like a lot of fun. It's great to have a cat who's as interested in spending time with you as you are with him!
post #3 of 11
He sounds so sweet, glad he's feeling better.

I agree that a second kitty would probably solve that problem.
post #4 of 11
I know how you feel as Mosi wants to play all the time but I do have to do other stuff sometimes so ignore the cries and meows and eventually he finds something to amuse himself with, plays with Jaffa or settles down for a sleep. He does get a lot of playtime so it's not like he's left to his own devices a lot, but I do feel a bit guilty sometimes as although he does have Jaffa to play with Jaffa's nearly 10 so not quite so much fun for Mosi as another kitten would be.
post #5 of 11
I just wanted to add in that my cat is sort of the same way.

My PHX demands every second of mine when I'm home. I know that it's because I'm gone all day at work. One thing that I'm still trying is.. When i first get home me and my boyfriend both play with him for 20 minutes for so, non-interrupted with other things. Then after that I need to make food for dinner so either me or my boyfriend will go cook. PHX at this point gets mad because we didn't spend enough time with him- he thinks. But I need to do what I gotta do, so I let him hang out by the stove while I do my thing and pet him occasionally- but he wants me to get down on the floor and play with him which at this point is not happening. After we cook and eat then we play again. But what I'm working on is him settling down while I try to get my own things done.

So, what I recommend is play with your kitty for a certain amount of time and let him get all tired out and then go on to your own thing. Don't give in even though you want to. I'm trying to train my PHX that it's not ALL about him, just most of it lol. PHX is starting to get onto a schedule of knowing when we can play, when we're leaving, and when to leave me alone,etc.

It'll come over time! Just give it some patience, and don't give in when you feel guilty!
post #6 of 11
I HIGHLY suggest getting a playmate for him. A cat around the same age and also male and neutered would be my suggestion. Female would be okay to as long as she is spayed. At 6 months he can impregnate a female the same age And get your boy done now that he is old enough. Neutered males tend to get along better in general then females IMO.
post #7 of 11
Thread Starter 
We have wanted to get another kitty around the same age but due to Alan having such bad cat flu it would not have been right to get another. He has only finished taking his anti-biotics today and therefore we have to wait a little while. He will be getting done as soon as vet says he can be. They can't be neutered until they are well enough so that has held us back so far. Thankfully there has been no spraying around the house yet!! I had to get the housework done so instead of feeling guilty, I looked rather silly as i stuck his toy that has a long feather attached to some string and a handle and put the handle in the back of my jeans pocket!!! So as I was washing up he was jumping and bashing his toy!!!! Also, he was chasing it around the house as I moved! He follows me around anyway so at least this stopped him meowing for attention. That way we were both occupied!!! Hahaha. Thanks all for the advice.
Howtoholdacat- Thanks for advice about where to get kitty. Have to be careful now as Alan had the flu quite badly (Alan is his rescue name that stuck!).
post #8 of 11
Quote:
Originally Posted by Althekitty View Post
We have wanted to get another kitty around the same age but due to Alan having such bad cat flu it would not have been right to get another. He has only finished taking his anti-biotics today and therefore we have to wait a little while. He will be getting done as soon as vet says he can be. They can't be neutered until they are well enough so that has held us back so far. Thankfully there has been no spraying around the house yet!! I had to get the housework done so instead of feeling guilty, I looked rather silly as i stuck his toy that has a long feather attached to some string and a handle and put the handle in the back of my jeans pocket!!! So as I was washing up he was jumping and bashing his toy!!!! Also, he was chasing it around the house as I moved! He follows me around anyway so at least this stopped him meowing for attention. That way we were both occupied!!! Hahaha. Thanks all for the advice.
Howtoholdacat- Thanks for advice about where to get kitty. Have to be careful now as Alan had the flu quite badly (Alan is his rescue name that stuck!).

Hee Hee, think I might have to try that with Humphrey!!

Hope alan settles down soon
post #9 of 11
that sounds like fuzzy before his last trip to the vet. he isnt completely back to normal after his vaccines yet.

I usually end up spending one on one time with him four about 20 minutes to keep him happiest. There are three other cats but he still wants my attention. JUST mine.
post #10 of 11
My Mom has a VERY high maintenance cat. She used to play with Frances every single time Fran would want it, so Frances got very spoiled and used to the fact that someone would be there to amuse her whenever she wanted. Created a bit of a cat-monster really (although Fran is very sweet so I shouldn't say bad things about her...). I'd definitely recommend limiting the amount of play-time you give to Alan. I understand wanting to stimulate him and keep him happy and entertained, but just like a child he needs to learn to spend time on his own as well.

In my Mom's case, getting another kitten really helped to make Frances less needy. She still LOVES play time with humans, but since the new kitten came along she has someone else to play with so it keeps her entertained a lot more. I also think it's really nice to have two cats (if you can accommodate them) because they can have some good "cat playtime" together, as it really is hard for us boring humans to know exactly how cats like to play.
post #11 of 11
Here we have designated playtimes 2x a day & no amount of meowing when it isn't "playtime" can get meowmy to play. They've all figured that ou. Hopefully, you can get a kitty friend soon!
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