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need advice :(

post #1 of 13
Thread Starter 
Sephie is about 2 years old, neutered and when we first got him, at about 8 weeks old, I gave him a bath and he was great, very well behaved.
The more I bathe him, the worse it gets.

Tonight I was trying to brush him and he was growling and hissing and he scratched me pretty badly on the hand.

What do you do? What kind of punishment is appropriate? I'm running out of ideas but he needs to get over this "phase".

He has been acting pretty bad since we got Isis and just really grumpy but he has been better and actually been back to his old self until you try to do something he doesn't want you to.

I give him a lot of attention and make sure that he knows he's my number one man.

I'm at a loss here about what to do.
post #2 of 13
Do you bathe him often? Cats normally doesn't like water and it is not good to bathe them often because this dries up their skin. I suggest if you are going to bathe him, you should trim his nails first. I've learned it the hard way myself. I'm not sure whether there is any punishment here because I'm not sure whether it's even possible to get a cat to love water.

I recently had to bathe my two cats and my mellow one to my surprise tried to bite me, but wasn't hard to puncture my skin. I was kind of sad because he has never done this before. I think he was very annoyed that day. He was shivering so I wrapped him in a towel and held him closely to me. I also gave him treats. I do that with my other cat too. I tries to associate treats to something good, in this case, a bath.
post #3 of 13
Thread Starter 
I actually trimmed his nails a few days ago but he scratched me while i was just trying to brush him. He tries to turn and wriggle around on me or take off. He actually started taking off and took me with him!

The bathing is another issue but kinda ties into his attitude. I don't bathe them often and it's probably every other months because of fleas. My husband has anaphylaxis to flea bites so I'm being cautious in that area.

He used to tolerate it but now he turns into the tazmanian devil. It's just gotten progressively worse from a cute kitten who let me do anything to watching and trying to handle taz.

When I took him to the vet to get microchipped, he peed on me! This is a cat who has never ever peed anywhere but in the litter box. He likes to look out the window in the car so I let him out and he sat on my lap and peed on me!

I'm just frustrated and worried about what the next thing will be. I've been watching it get worse and I don't want it to get even more worse

Is it age? He'll be 2 in May.
post #4 of 13
That actually happened to me several times when I tries to groom them and they either swat at me (no claws out *whew*) or gently bite me and take off. I just take that as a sign that don't want me to groom them at this time so I try later.

Is your cat on any flea medication? None of my two cats are on flea medication so I keep my home extremely clean, especially near windows. I use bio spot that I spray near all windows and their beddings. I have carpets so it's very easy to attract fleas so vacuuming once a week is a must. Great exercise for me. hehehe

I'm wondering whether if he is jealous or upset/ stress with Isis being in the picture. Have you seen the two play with each other? Any sign of aggression?

With the peeing, if it is just a one time incident, it could be just an accident since no litterbox was available in your car and that cat will normally find the most comfortable spot to pee, in your case, on your lap. If he continues to have accidents like this, maybe he might need an urinalysis.

I don't think age matters, plus 2 years old is still a very young cat. I think it maybe environmental changes contributing to his behavior. I'm no expert so you may need to consult your vet in seeking an animal behaviorist. Just my two cents.
post #5 of 13
Thread Starter 
My vet is actually a behaviorist, I remembered after you said that. I might give her a call.

There was a LOT of agression at first with Isis but now, not so much. Not from him, she whines a little when the others bug her. She's not really a cat cat but she is getting better and lets Gabriel groom her and actually purrs when he does it.

Flea meds...when I can afford it. They never go outside but I put it on them when I can.

I vacuum every single stinking day because of the birds and their seeds. (not my fav chore...haha).

Before we got Isis, he was standoffish with he didn't need me anymore. He was my velcro kitty and always slept on me and then ignored me and now he's getting mean but only when I'm trying to do something he doesn't want me to.
If I waited for him to be ready to get brushed, he would never get brushed.

I know it's a lot for him because we got Orion and then a month later Isis but Isis showed up on my door, it wasn't planned.

i might call her and see what a consult is, i think it's 50$ or maybe 100$ i can't remember.

I just feel sad and hopeless. I want my sweet baby back
post #6 of 13
Do you mind if I ask something which may be obvious to you - do you know (at this point) if in fact either of your cats actually has fleas any more? Or if there are any (left) in the house? If you keep the cats indoors, and have properly treated your home, and the vet has 'passed' your cats for any fleas, there may no longer be any need to be as careful as you're being (and I do know about anaphylactic shock). Bathing a cat often is very hard on them, and brushing a male cat vigorously (when he already has dry skin from bathing) can be overstimulating and very uncomfortable, and I would try everything else possible to deal with fleas before continuing to subject him to either more baths or brushing. I've had many cats for 40 yrs, most of which have been outside on leashes at least in summer, and can remember maybe only one incident where any treatment was necessary and that only for a short time (and I am definitely not a perfectionist about housekeeping). Dogs tend to be much more prone to getting fleas, spreading them around and acquiring new ones, though again we treat ours once a year and have had none in years. I know you want to protect your husband, but if he's out in the world anyway with the rest of us all day (and has an Anakit), and your cats have been cleared by the vet, you may be putting the cat through a lot of unnecessary hardship for nothing (now). Or possibly you might consider re-homing him, as he seems to becoming more and more miserable.
post #7 of 13
I agree with the poster above. Almost all cats hate bathing and find it very traumatic. There are almost no good reasons to bathe a cat and put them (and you) through that. You can usually find another way. My family has had cats for decade and we've never bathed one. I use cat wipes to clean them up if there's a mess, but they usually do a better job themselves.

If you have seen fleas on the cat, I think you should be able to find an inexpensive flea product... or you could use a flea comb.

If you haven't seen fleas, I would stop bathing completely. I've heard that flea dips are dangerous, and just regular bathing with water is unlikely to do anything... except make the cat wet.
post #8 of 13
Thread Starter 
no's just a precaution and the brushing is for the hair..not with a flea comb.

Even if I stop bathing him, I still have to brush him regularly.

The whole point is that he gets violent when I start doing anything he doesnt like. He starts growling when I clip his nails but never anything passed that though but it probably won't be long until he starts scratching and biting when I clip his nails.

I'm ok with not bathing them but brushing I'd like to keep doing it (we only recently started that) to cut down on hair and hairballs.

Maybe I can try to "brush" him with my hand first and get him used to that.

Rehoming is not an option at this point.

He went from a cat I could do anything with to a cat I can do nothing with almost.
post #9 of 13
Others probably have good tips on brushing. A lot of cats actually like being brushed, and some prefer combs. I'd suggest starting with a short brushing session, and brushing only the areas he likes to be touched best (with my cat it's the head and face and neck). Scratch or pet him while you're doing it (whatever he likes). Starting with your hand is also a good idea.

Let him walk away when he's tired of it. After a while he'll have more positive associations of brushing and you'll be able to brush him more.

Peeing at the vet's office or on the way to or from the vet's office is pretty common. The cat's just really scared.
post #10 of 13
Thread Starter 
ok will do. I'm just going to love on him today.

One of my cats actually likes it and was falling asleep (Gabriel).
post #11 of 13
You might want to try a 'zoom groom' many cats that hate being brushed love it.
post #12 of 13
Thread Starter 
i may have to buy one online cause i can't find one in stores.

I have been loving on him and just petting him all day telling him he's a good boy.
post #13 of 13
I have a grooming mit that I bought for my dogs but the cats like it also. It gives them a sense that you are just petting them without having a brush or comb - some of my cats simply don't like the brush.

If you need to treat all 4 of your cats with flea products, PM me for a way to do it more cost economically.
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