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Best Way to Find New Playmate for Cat That Lost Her Brother?

post #1 of 7
Thread Starter 

Recently we lost Bamboo, one of our two eleven-year-old cats, to illness. He is survived by his sister Cassidy.

Because Cassidy has never known a time when her brother wasn’t around to keep her company (he made a great pillow), she’s at a bit of a loss now that she’s alone. So, my wife and I are thinking about bringing another cat into our home so that she will have one of her own kind to interact with.

My wife and I are at an age where we really don’t want to start over with a kitten or very young cat, so we’re thinking of trying to find a cat that’s about Cassidy’s age. Cassidy’s temperament has always been friendly and sociable, and we’d want to find a cat with a similar accepting attitude.

If you have gone through a similar experience or have any suggestions to help us in our decision making, please let me know. For example:

* Is it better to get a same-sex cat, one of the opposite sex, or doesn’t it matter?

* Does it make sense to have the two cats meet each other ahead of time to see if they will get along?

* Should we consider only cats that have been brought up with other cats?

* Etc.

post #2 of 7
The best place to start is an animal shelter. They should be able to answer all your questions. Your cat may not take to another cat as they are territorial. Introductions would have to be slow, with steps taking some weeks to complete. Look up some previous posts with similar questions.
post #3 of 7
While this is just a generalization, most females do better with males than other females.
Since she is 11 and has only known a male, I would get another male.

I agree that a cat around her age and temperment would be the best fit, someone very similar to her lost brother.

Animal shelter, or petfinder are the best places to look.

In fact, I'm sure most of the shelter workers will be overjoyed when you inform them that you are looking for a senior cat.

Good luck, I hope you are able to find her the perfect companion.
post #4 of 7
First, I'd like to tell you how sorry I am for your loss

We lost our Davidson- 9.5 month old male week ago today, and we have Harley- a 1.5 year old male as well.

The loss affected him greatly- he was so lost, he would walk around crying out for him, as he was his life for almost a whole year of his life.
We knew we had to do something to help fill that 'void' he was feeling, and for us as well.

We went to our local Humane Society and sat in the kennel with the age of cats we wanted, which was 5 months - 1 year, and the perfect cat picked us He is 11 months old, with the same personality that Davidson was.

We brought him home Saturday and so far, they are getting along quite well, adn I can tell that Harley is becoming happier already- and having a little one that reminds us so much of Davidson helps us, and Harley.

I highly suggest going to your local shelter to find a new companion for you, and your other cat. There are so many there looking for a new loving home

We got another male, as we've only had males, and I didn't want to get a female because I've heard that males get along better with males- but all in all, I know its all about personality, and thats what we really based our decision on.

If you have any questions, please do not hesitate to PM me
post #5 of 7
I'm sorry for your loss of Bamboo. I do think it is wonderful that you want to get another cat for companion to yourselves and your girl kitty. I agree that an older male cat would be good. The shelter workers can help you a lot with that since they know the personality and temperment of the cats that have spent any time there. Older cats do have a harder time getting adopted so it would be wonderful if you could give one a home. They should know whether the cat is laid back and gets along well with other cats. I would read some of the threads on here about introducing cats. There is some great information.

petfinder.com is a great resource. You just put in the age and sex of the cat you are looking for and you will find a big list, with pictures of many wonderful cats needing homes.

Good luck and please let us know which lucky kitty you take home!
post #6 of 7
My heart goes out to you and Bamboo. You're doing the right thing, welcoming another cat into your home... not just for Cassidy, but for yourselves, and surely for the lucky homeless kitty who will find a home with you.

I just want to reiterate babyharley's point that the kitty will most likely choose you, rather than vice versa. You might make sure to give Cassidy a good snuggle before you go to the shelter, so her scent will be on your clothes... sort of a "calling card."

Also, as someone else mentioned, it's true that females usually accept males more readily... but if the kitty who chooses you turns out to be a girl, don't feel you have to hold fast to that rule. The most important thing is how you go about introducing the two of them. There's a great thread about that here:


The techniques described there really, really help. Just be sure to give Cassidy lots of loving attention, so she never feels for a moment as if the new kitty is trying to replace her in your affections.

Your family will be in my thoughts. Let us know how things go!
post #7 of 7
Thread Starter 
Thanks everyone for the helpful information!

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