I seriously regret the day I ever said "yes"....

white cat lover

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I realize how this post is going to sound & it is not going to sound well, but I'm getting desperate. A year ago, I made the biggest mistake of my life. I said "yes" to Ophelia.

Last night, I opened the bathroom door & Ophelia saw Lily...no thought, not one second for me to react, she just took off after Lily. When I took Lily to the vet this am, he said she didn't require stitches this time. This is the 6th time Ophelia's injured Lily enough that it warranted a vet visit. I won't mention how many of those times Lily has required stitches. Once again, Lily is on anti-biotics for 14 days. I have to clean her wound 2x a day as well.

I thought I could keep the two of them separated, but I can no longer do that. Ophelia breaks through baby gates. She darts through an open door. I've tried re-introductions several times. Things have just gotten way out of hand. I mean, the Lily I know & love is dead & gone. Ophelia killed her a year ago. The Lily I have no has started spraying & there is no medical cause. The Lily I have now bites & scratches. She hides from people & other animals. Even the vet noticed a massive change in the kitty Lily was a year ago to the kitty Lily is now. The only thing the vet had to say about Ophelia was "I have no suggestion that you will listen to"..... meaning his only advice is to euthanize Ophelia. Ophelia isn't happy here anymore. She hisses at me, at the other cats, at the dogs. She plays less & less. She didn't fight me at all when I gave her a bath, which is very unusual.

I'm crying as I write this because I don't know what to do anymore. I didn't hardly sleep at all last night trying to figure out what to do. I don't know that you guys can help, but I've hit a wall I can't get past. I can't get Ophelia to a behaviorist for several reasons. Medicating her doesn't help. Feliway doesn't help. I tried some herbal thing(I think Rescue Remedy) & it didn't help.

If I just had Dorian & Ophelia, all would be well. Ophelia does well with male cats who are mellow. I've been looking for another home for her, but haven't had any luck. Mostly because I won't let her go to "any" home. She needs a home that understands what they're getting. And that is impossible to find here.

What now?
 

consumerkitty

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I really wish I could offer some useful advice, but you've already tried everything I could think of. I'll send vibes for Ophelia to calm down and leave Lilly alone. Your situation makes me cry and I'm praying for a miracle.
 

zissou'smom

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May be an unpopular opinion, but it is unfair to all your cats to keep Ophelia there. She is unhappy, and she is terrorizing Lily to the point where it is life threatening. They can't live in the same house, and I don't think anyone can fault you for realizing that.

I can't imagine how hard this is on you, and for you to have to think about. I'm so sorry.

I hope you can find Ophelia and only-cat home that you like soon


Maybe you don't want to let her go, and so are being too picky about where she goes? I do that sometimes when I don't want to admit that I don't like the situation I'm in. Honestly, if the vet is saying to put her to sleep, a home that treats her half as well as you have tried to is good (because half as well is still good, of course)
 

maddensmom

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I don't have any advice for you, but I wanted to know that you are in my thoughts and prayers!
What a heartbreaking situation!
 
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white cat lover

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My problem with finding a home is that the few I've seen that would bother to remember to feed/water, vet her, & take care of her always insist that she isn't that bad. The homes that offer to take her all have female cats. I can't seem to get it across to people that she really will attack another female cat. I cannot guarantee that she will get along with another male cat, but it's a better chance.

The other thing is that the home has to have no kids. Kids move too fast for her & she gets freaked out. She is liable to attack.

All I want is a home with a male cat or no other cats, no kids(I think once she gets into the right home, in a year she could be good with kids, but for now she needs that quieter home), & someone who will get her regular vet care. I don't just want to put an ad in the paper. I might just have to suck up & tell everyone at the shelter that I want to lsit Ophelia on petfinder.
 

kai bengals

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If you're not 100% ready to give up yet. Ask your Vet to let you try, fluoxetine. It's Prozac.

It's useful in treating aggression in dogs and anxiety/aggression in cats. You can get it compounded into liquid form by a pharmacy, so it's easy to administer.

May be worth this last ditch effort to keep her with you.
 

katiemae1277

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Oh, Nat, I don't have any advice to give you, all I can say is you truly are an angel to these kitties, I really don't think I could do what you do
when Posey and Hades were "arguing" for a week I thought I was going to pull my hair out, but a year? and no change? I would be as crazy as Ophelia by now. I hope you can find that perfect home for her, and I don't think anyone could find any fault with you re-homing her
 
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white cat lover

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Originally Posted by Kai Bengals

If you're not 100% ready to give up yet. Ask your Vet to let you try, fluoxetine. It's Prozac.

It's useful in treating aggression in dogs and anxiety/aggression in cats. You can get it compounded into liquid form by a pharmacy, so it's easy to administer.

May be worth this last ditch effort to keep her with you.
Do you know if Prozac is any different than Amitrityline? I will have to do some research. I also will do a full vet check again, just to be 100% sure it's nothing physical.
 

kai bengals

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Originally Posted by white cat lover

Do you know if Prozac is any different than Amitrityline? I will have to do some research. I also will do a full vet check again, just to be 100% sure it's nothing physical.
Amitriptyline is different than Prozac, but it is also used to treat depression/anxiety in cats. I've heard that it causes drowiness and cats tend to relapse after going off the meds, but Prozac has a better track record and many cats have gone off the meds and not relapsed into problem behavior.
I've done a little research on this, but have never had the need to use it, so I can't speak from practical experience. Maybe you can find out enough about it to decide if it's worth a shot.
Hope it all works out.
 
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white cat lover

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Originally Posted by Kai Bengals

Amitriptyline is different than Prozac, but it is also used to treat depression/anxiety in cats. I've heard that it causes drowiness and cats tend to relapse after going off the meds, but Prozac has a better track record and many cats have gone off the meds and not relapsed into problem behavior.
I've done a little research on this, but have never had the need to use it, so I can't speak from practical experience. Maybe you can find out enough about it to decide if it's worth a shot.
Hope it all works out.
When I had her on Amitrityline, she got better, then got worse. Vet said he almost never sees that happen, so I discontinued meds. He didn't know what else to try.

The one thing I'm reading about Prozac & if I am understanding correctly, it is the human form that is given to cats/dogs? Does anyone know who here has their kitty on Prozac? I can't for the life of me remember the username....
 

bella713

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Originally Posted by white cat lover

When I had her on Amitrityline, she got better, then got worse. Vet said he almost never sees that happen, so I discontinued meds. He didn't know what else to try.

The one thing I'm reading about Prozac & if I am understanding correctly, it is the human form that is given to cats/dogs? Does anyone know who here has their kitty on Prozac? I can't for the life of me remember the username....
Yes it's Wonton
 

laureen227

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Originally Posted by white cat lover

Thanks! I just couldn't remember the username!
& i'm thinking there's a transdermal form of it that you rub on their ear - much easier than pilling, IMO. would be worth a shot, anyway - from working with children diagnosed with ADHD, i can tell you that different meds work differently on different people. i don't see why cats wouldn't be the same. so the prozac might work even tho the amytriptyline didn't.
 
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white cat lover

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Originally Posted by laureen227

& i'm thinking there's a transdermal form of it that you rub on their ear - much easier than pilling, IMO. would be worth a shot, anyway - from working with children diagnosed with ADHD, i can tell you that different meds work differently on different people. i don't see why cats wouldn't be the same. so the prozac might work even tho the amytriptyline didn't.
She's relatively easy to pill. Easier than all the other 5, actually. I'm trying to gather info before I call the vet as I'm sure they'll be like "You want a prescription for what?"
 

sicycat

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Just wanted to say I'm sorry you are having to go through this. I cant imagine how difficult it must be. I am normally not one to agree with giving up cats once you take them in but I think in your situation finding a new home for her is probably best for everyone
Good luck with everything
 

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I don't have any further suggestions, but just wanted to let you know that I am keeping you and all of your kitties in my thoughts and prayers.
 

kluchetta

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Poor you, and poor Lily and Ophelia.
Is there any chance of rehoming Lily to a home that just doesn't have Ophelia in it?
 
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