The culprit unmasked...

I mentioned awhile back that we were finding puddles of piddle on throw rugs around the house, and that we suspected Sassy, our plump little longhaired calitortie glamourkitty. Through process of elimination (excuse the pun), that suspicion has now been confirmed.

We were about to take Sassy in for what we hoped would be a simple diagnosis of UTI when we realized that there's probably nothing physically wrong at all: she's just afraid of confronting my little Pearl. Apparently, if Pearl is between Sassy and the litterbox, Sassy just goes where she's at, poor thing. (Except that she's thoughtful enough to do it on things we can wash, bless her heart!)

Pearl is not at all the fearsome beast Sassy believes her to be, but they never have gotten along. Still, they've lived in the same house for over a year with only minor troubles, so I don't know why the situation has suddenly taken this turn.

We're trying Bach's beech oil on both of them, and we're keeping the Comfort Zone diffusers going night and day, of course. Next step is a vet who uses both traditional and alternative medicine. The friend who recommended this vet had a male who was spraying in the house despite neutering, and after trying various herbal remedies (with partial success), they finally put him on Prozac, and he's doing fine. But that's the last resort.

Meanwhile, is there anything... I know this is probably a stupid question, but... is there ANYTHING we might do to help Sassy and Pearl become friends? Our boys get along beautifully, but our girls just don't.

Maybe a little kitty slumber party... they could make popcorn, and do each other's hair, and look at pictures of unneutered males in Cat Fancy...

Originally Posted by CarolPetunia

We were about to take Sassy in for what we hoped would be a simple diagnosis of UTI when we realized that there's probably nothing physically wrong at all: she's just afraid of confronting my little Pearl. Apparently, if Pearl is between Sassy and the litterbox, Sassy just goes where she's at, poor thing. (Except that she's thoughtful enough to do it on things we can wash, bless her heart!)

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How many litterboxes do you have? If you have several, they should be placed in different and accessible locations in your home.

Originally Posted by CarolPetunia

Meanwhile, is there anything... I know this is probably a stupid question, but... is there ANYTHING we might do to help Sassy and Pearl become friends?

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Not really. I do not support using behavior altering drugs just so they can act the way we want them to. The fact that they tolerate each other is a step forward. They may become good friends and again they may never be. Time will tell.

You could try introducing them in a deliberate, quiet environment. Feed them both at the same time, give them some obvious hints. It might work...

Y'know, that's not a bad idea -- a re-introduction of sorts. Thank you! It sure can't hurt...

Put another reply and let me know how it goes

Hi, Cercia -- the update is: I forgot to mention in my first post that we had immediately put a litterbox in the kitchen, where Sassy spends much of her time, and we've had no puddles since. However, we don't want to keep a box in there indefinitely, so we're working on the Sassy/Pearl bonding thing.

The beech oil seems to help a bit when we're able to get it on them... Pearl is easy, but Sassy instantly throws it into reverse and whooosh! Mom and I have also been trying to spend an hour or so per day closed in the kitchen with both of them, and while we're all in there, we serve warm KMR and treats, and we dangle toys for them to play with... hoping they'll begin to associate each other's company with good things.

There really does seem to be a bit of improvement! Hope that trend continues...

Thanks for asking!

Y'know, maybe I should address Yayi's comment above, to clarify that I, too, abhor the thought of having to use Prozac on our cats -- and I would never do it just "so they can act the way we want them to."

But there's a major difference between micromanaging a kitty's behavior through drugs and using a drug as a last resort to make it possible for the kitty to:

(a) Be free of the terrible anxiety that her behavior indicates, and

(b) Continue to roam freely in the house.

So I hope no one thinks I'm some kind of monster for considering Prozac. The fact is, I also suffer from anxiety and depression, and I've taken Prozac myself in the past (though I'm on a different medication now) -- so I know how fear can paralyze you, and how good it feels to be given the chemical tools to cope with it.

One point of education, for those who are not aware of it: antidepressants like Prozac are not merely "feel-good" drugs like marijuana (for example) -- they are designed to correct something that's wrong in the brain chemistry, to bring the patient back to normal. It's no different from a diabetic taking a drug to help his body produce more insulin.

So... we'll try everything short of it -- but if Prozac is what it takes to keep Sassy from living in constant dread, then we'll try that, too.

It sounds like those two have started to get along again! Good for them!

Do consider finding a place somewhere for another box, though. It seems like that's such a point of contention.

Good luck!