Regarding Amber, John and the baby

catloverin_ks · Jan 30, 2007

Originally Posted by StarryEyedTiGeR

I'm soo glad a formal announcement was made. I have been wanting to say something for several days now but held off as i knew Anne was going to make one. I am one of the ones who checked into his story and i don't mind saying so. At one point, i was going to send things for the baby and wanted to verify everything before doing so. I went online and looked up the address he gave me to- the one where "Amber" supposedly lived- only to find that there was no record of her. At that point- I called the hospital numbers he gave me claiming where the baby was at. I called 3 different numbers (and after doing so- looked up ALL of the hospitals in that area.) Not one had a record of Amber, John, or the baby. None of them. It was definitely at this point that i realized it was a hoax- but attempting to give them one last chance- i called the morgues in that area and another member called the funeral homes- No record. I also called the NICU- no record of a baby under that name ever being there. So there you have it folks- if there was any glimmer of doubt left- please know that I at least fried to verify everything to no avail. Nobody under those names in those areas are in any of the records there. I'm sorry. I know ya'll got as invested into this story as i did. What made me curious before i ever did the calling around was that first picture posted of Kaelyn- if you notice in the background there are flowers, chocolate, and a card....Who would give that to someone who had just lost the mom? Also- John supposedly claimed that he was extremely allergic to flowers when members asked if they could send some to the funeral home- see...things don't add up. There were a few other things like that which really lead me to believe it was a hoax (i had NEVER heard of anyone faking an online death before this so it was quite a shock for me. I just don't understand the reasoning behind it.) Once i called around and checked up on the story- that was proof enough for me to know it was a hoax. I wanted to tell ya'll sooner...but i knew a formal announcement was going to be made and thought it was best to let Anne do so after she had also researched as well so i was not the only one. I am sorry we all cried and mourned over this story when it was only a hoax. I am still infuriated over the entire thing.

Thank you for telling us all that!! I still think theres more to the story than even all of this......

arlyn · Jan 30, 2007

Originally Posted by Dusty's Mom

The part that bothered me the most was 1) no obit, 2) no talk after the auto accident about insurance settlement that would pay for John's inability to work, if the accident wasn't his fault, 3) no talk of what may have caused this mysterious internal bleeding that caused her "death."

Again, I'll say that Obits and birth announcements are at the family's descretion and are not a good indicator.
Neither exist unless the family decides they should, and pays for them.

As for her death, an autptopsy would again be for the family to decide, unless it appeared suspicious and only then would the county step in and have one done.
And someone not savvy with medical terms and conditions may not know how to convey causes.

Insurance settlements can take a very long time, I'm still waiting on one for an accident that happened 11 years ago.

The opnly thing you can go on here is what's available (or not available) in public records.

starryeyedtiger · Jan 30, 2007

Originally Posted by Kiwideus

Thank you for doing what you did. That was brave of you.

You're very welcome. I felt ya'll had a right to know as soon as the formal announcement was made. I just wish it was good news- but it wasn't. I had never heard of anyone faking a death before online- so it's all pretty new to me concerning this situation. I will say though- even though we were lied to and misled- TCS is a wonderful place- and you can really tell how much the members care and love each other- that is amazing....reguardless of the situation

Originally Posted by catloverin_ks

Thank you for telling us all that!! I still think theres more to the story than even all of this......

I do too

I guess we'll never know though- i just wanna know WHY you know. Why make up such a fib and hurt sooooooooo many people in the process. Also, it doesn't seem like the motive was money eithor- so why do it? I'm wondering if it's something mental or emotional. I dunno

phenomsmom · Jan 30, 2007

Thank you Nikki for letting us know that you did the research only to find that this was all a hoax.

leto86 · Jan 30, 2007

Some people gets their kicks off hurting other people. Whether this was the case or not, I have no idea. Still sick for whatever reason that whoever it is, did it.

goosehazel · Jan 30, 2007

Thanks for taking care of all of us Nikki

And to you to Anne

menagerie mama · Jan 30, 2007

WOW....I am speechless....I actually feel sick.

starryeyedtiger · Jan 30, 2007

Originally Posted by Phenomsmom

Thank you Nikki for letting us know that you did the research only to find that this was all a hoax.

Originally Posted by goosehazel

Thanks for taking care of all of us Nikki

And to you to Anne

Thankyou ladies...but i cannot take all the credit, a few other members (i won't name names i'll let them if they choose to do so) and mods also looked into this situation as well. We all worked together to investigate it and share information. Anne really did a wonderful job taking care of all of us when we pm'd here with concern after things started to not check out. She verified the things that we looked up and when things didn't check out confronted john in a way. She takes very good care of her site here and all of the member

/ I'm just sad that all of this happened and we got lied to and emotionally distressed over it all- but when it comes down to it, there are bad people in this world and things happen. Reguardless- it is still nice to see how everyone on TCS stuck together and opened up their hearts and showered lots of love on everyone in what they thought was a bad situation (i did too at first). It's nice to see what wonderful people really are here reguardless of a few bad ones like with what happened.

proudkittiemom · Jan 30, 2007

Originally Posted by StarryEyedTiGeR

I'm soo glad a formal announcement was made. I have been wanting to say something for several days now but held off as i knew Anne was going to make one. I am one of the ones who checked into his story and i don't mind saying so. At one point, i was going to send things for the baby and wanted to verify everything before doing so. I went online and looked up the address he gave me to- the one where "Amber" supposedly lived- only to find that there was no record of her. At that point- I called the hospital numbers he gave me claiming where the baby was at. I called 3 different numbers (and after doing so- looked up ALL of the hospitals in that area.) Not one had a record of Amber, John, or the baby. None of them. It was definitely at this point that i realized it was a hoax- but attempting to give them one last chance- i called the morgues in that area and another member called the funeral homes- No record. I also called the NICU- no record of a baby under that name ever being there. So there you have it folks- if there was any glimmer of doubt left- please know that I at least fried to verify everything to no avail. Nobody under those names in those areas are in any of the records there. I'm sorry. I know ya'll got as invested into this story as i did. What made me curious before i ever did the calling around was that first picture posted of Kaelyn- if you notice in the background there are flowers, chocolate, and a card....Who would give that to someone who had just lost the mom? Also- John supposedly claimed that he was extremely allergic to flowers when members asked if they could send some to the funeral home- see...things don't add up. There were a few other things like that which really lead me to believe it was a hoax (i had NEVER heard of anyone faking an online death before this so it was quite a shock for me. I just don't understand the reasoning behind it.) Once i called around and checked up on the story- that was proof enough for me to know it was a hoax. I wanted to tell ya'll sooner...but i knew a formal announcement was going to be made and thought it was best to let Anne do so after she had also researched as well so i was not the only one. I am sorry we all cried and mourned over this story when it was only a hoax. I am still infuriated over the entire thing.

thanx for letting us kno !!!

I am so shcoked right now i dont know what to say !!! even tho i didnt kno her that well I was still saddened by the situation and i was praying for the baby and her family and what not, I have heard of faking deaths online but I never actually seen it on a site i was at! It just makes u wonder alot of things

and also something that was odd to me and my mom(my mom views the site sometimes when i am on down here in the dining room) was the baby's picture, the baby looked alot bigger than a premie but some can but compared to me niece and nephew that baby looked big (and my niece and nephew werent premies) Also I just wanted to add to everyone that i am a real and geniune person, i was so saddened by this and now i am in shock I guess i am too gulliable !!!!!!

urbantigers · Jan 30, 2007

Thanks for posting this. After my initial shock and sadness at reading about Amber's "death" I, too, began to have my suspicions. I try to give people the benefit of the doubt, however, so hoped I was wrong. I guess we'll never know for certain whether there is any truth in any of this, but the facts as we have them do point to it being a hoax.

Sadly I have encountered people faking their death online before. A teenager on a board I used to frequent claimed to have leukaemia and several months after she started posting someone else posted that she had died. A few months later the OP actually had the nerve to start posting again. It transpired that she was in her 20's, was a mother of 2 and did not have leukaemia. She thought it was a huge joke and couldn't understand why anyone might be upset by her actions. I really don't know what motivates people to behave like that.

reesespbc · Jan 30, 2007

I just want to say too that hopefully this experience doesn't make TCS a less friendly and inviting place to be. There are many of us here (if not a majority) who are genuine and who know that to be true about each other. Hopefuly that doesn't change.

white cat lover · Jan 30, 2007

Yet another reason why TCS is great....people check into things & look out for the rest of us.

to all who looked out for us!!!

lunasmom · Jan 30, 2007

The only and I mean ONLY possibility is that they used fake names on this site.

However if the hospitals did not have any record of a death like this, then sadly we were all had.

At least it answers my question of whether or not people lie this still exist out there.

Moz · Jan 30, 2007

Originally Posted by Dusty's Mom

What I'm wondering is can admin - Anne? - check IPs to see if 4crazycats has been online since Jan. 25? I think if this is a hoax she would want to see what kind of reaction she has stirred up.

When I found out she had died, I checked her profile and it said she had been on around 8 pm on the day she died. I thought she had kept herself logged in and John just signed her out.

arlyn · Jan 30, 2007

Originally Posted by lunasmom

The only and I mean ONLY possibility is that they used fake names on this site.

However if the hospitals did not have any record of a death like this, then sadly we were all had.

At least it answers my question of whether or not people lie this still exist out there.

With the new federal privacy laws, Hospitals and such do not give out ANY information beyond whether or not such and such came into the ER.

I would assume that the names are fake for two reasons:

1) If this is indeed a hoax (and I think it is), they wouldn't want us knowing who they really are.

or

2) A lot of people are very paranoid about the internet (with good reason) and habitually use fake names.

It would be impossible to get any public records on people using fake names and public records are the only source to get such info from.

Moz · Jan 30, 2007

Originally Posted by emily_325

I even placed a rose from the vplaza on my posts in her memory, as did many other members. Now I look at it sitting there and wonder if it should be there at all. If it all did really happen, it will stay there as a tribute to her. If it was all a hoax, it will stay there as a reminder to be more careful next time and not to get so wrapped up before we have all the facts.

I feel bad having the rose there--since this is all a hoax and research was made.
But my question is--who "is" Amber and John? Where did they get these pictures of Nazumi, Bagheera, Kitten, Annie, and Lily? Are "Amber" and "John" real people, but just used fake names? I just wish we all had answers to this.

bella713 · Jan 30, 2007

You can go into your profile and make the Rose invisible!

starryeyedtiger · Jan 30, 2007

Originally Posted by Bella713

You can go into your profile and make the Rose invisible!

Thankyou for posting that. I didn't know if we could or not. I will definitely be doing that now.

sarahp · Jan 30, 2007

One of the reasons why I'm so upset about this is that it freaked my husband out about me having kids. As I have said previously, his mother died when he was 3 months old because she chose not to have cancer treatment - she chose to have him, and I have a heart condition which means my pregnancy will be considered "high risk", and I will need to see a high risk ob/gyn, and probably won't be allowed to have a natural birth.

There's the possibility I'm pregnant (4 not pregnant tests though now...

, but still no period), and this really really scared us about how things can go wrong during childbirth

hopehacker · Jan 30, 2007

For all of the people who cried, and who mourned the passing of Amber please don't be angry or disappointed in yourselves. You were just feeling the way any decent human being would feel and reacting the way any decent human being would react.

Don't be mad at yourselves because you BELIEVED a story that you couldn't imagine not to be true. After all, what decent person would lie about a death, and about a baby being left alone in life without it's mother? I would say that 99.9% of the members of TCS wonderful, genuine, and honest people. I have never come upon an online community where there was so many wonderful, caring and giving people. Please don't let this jade your hearts, because for every bad person there is out there, there are 3 good people.

To care about this baby and to mourn her mother is natural. If it's a hoax, then remember it's not on you. You didn't make a fool out of yourself for being a DECENT human being, but instead remember it was THEM who made a fool out of themselves, (and their Karma will show this) by trying to take advantage of good and decent hearts.

I myself don't know whether or not it's a hoax or a reality, although I tend to think it is probably a hoax. I know I too shed some tears for that baby, and for the loss of one so young as Amber, not even 21 years of age. I am not going to let myself feel like I was a fool, though, what I will allow myself to feel though, is sorry for anyone who would stoop so low to fabricate a story like this, for what ever reason. If it's fabricated, think of the damage they've done to themselves and their soul. Please don't let it damage who you are, as well.

Regarding Amber, John and the baby

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